


A Sunny Sky

by Leonixon



Category: Transformers (Bay Movies), Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One
Genre: Angst, F/M, Family, Friendship/Love, Holoform, Human, Hurt/Comfort, The start to the shin-dig that is Sunny and Felicity, human/cybertronian relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-30
Updated: 2018-12-17
Packaged: 2019-03-11 11:38:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 14
Words: 72,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13523481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leonixon/pseuds/Leonixon
Summary: She was just an artist trying to perfect her painting skills, make a living, and get into the college of her dreams. He was a broken, battle scarred mech with issues who gave up his profession of art long ago. It just so happened fate decided that it was time they met. G1/BayMovie AU, human OC/SS,





	1. Acrylic Paint

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter One Acrylic Paint**

* * *

He could have sworn that a permanent scowl was carved on his face for about an hour now. Throughout the whole damn gallery, he kept it on his face. People would glance at him with worried or quizzical expressions. Some were showing their annoyance at his displeasure more obviously than others. He, however, would simply brush their gazes away with no interest.

So now, he stood with his arms firmly crossed over his chest and his hip slightly cocked to the side. His stance was relaxed and comfortable showing no signs of a mind to anyone who saw him. He titled his head again for the millionth time and grumbled.

He had enough of the bland artwork that was displayed in front of him. Two canvases, each painted a solid red and blue hung next to each other. He looked around himself seeing people take photos of the work, They were truly impressed? Was there even a message behind the work? If so, it was hard to decipher. That, or he gave up very easily. He doubted it was that though.

How could humans be so dense?

With a huff he moved on to the next picture. _Oh for Primus sake._ He thought. Not another geometrical expression piece. He moved on not bothering to examine the squares, triangles, and circles that purged out solid rainbows. Is this what the humans were teaching to young apprentices at these so called universities?

Another sigh.

Where was the emotion? The hard effort? The feelings placed upon canvas that proved to show emotions and an objector? Where were the gentle maidens wishing upon stars? Where were the cafés, the busy streets, the starry nights, flowers, and fields? Where was the _heart_ and _color_?

The mech named Sunstreaker had enough of this particular gallery. He was only here to kill the time, after all. Shoving his hands into his holoform's jean pockets, he mumbled under his breath again and walked on. Back on Cybertron all this work would have been immediately criticized for simple mindedness. Artists were to challenge the norm but not lose their viewers intent doing so. And this had lost his attention very long ago.

Just as he was about to go on the elevator to leave, another corridor that branched off to the side caught his attention. It was mostly empty and poorly lit, most likely because of the lesser amount of new artwork on the walls. Sunstreaker paused in his step and glanced at a couple who walked right past it. Shouldn't they at least give the corridor a glance? Sunstreaker sighed and rolled his eyes at his own ironic declaration. He supposed he should to…

He walked past the elevator and continued to walk at a slow pace. He was in no rush to see more triangles and rainbows being poured from a human eye.

The holoform turned the corner and prepared himself, expecting the same. But no. Sunstreaker was very pleasantly surprised.

It was as if he wanted to run forward and brush his hands over the large canvas. Instead, he walked in front of the bench that was in front of the piece of work. His eyes traveled all over the canvas, taking every detail in.

Before him was an acrylic painting of a lone girl sitting at a table with a coffee mug in front of her. Wistfully she was looking out the window. Her elbows rested on the table while her hands were gently clasped behind her neck. He cringed at the small mistakes in the hands. He could admit, being a seasoned artist, he hadn't quiet mastered hands yet either. A small smile came to his lips as hope rose in his spark.

Each brushstroke was amazing. He looked closer almost touching the dried raised acrylic with his fingertips. He narrowed his eyes. He could point out the different brush strokes, the water used, and not used in certain areas. The mech could tell from the angry strokes, from the sad strokes, to quick and stressed and calm to soothing. Whoever created this work of art must have known what they were doing.

There was emotion and feeling. There was a message and a sad almost reluctant feel to the work. He backed away realizing his hand was touching the work. He cleared his throat and finally took notice of a young woman sitting behind him on the bench. He spun around completely, embarrassed at being caught off guard.

She didn't seem to notice as she smiled sadly. She was sitting cross-legged while her arms rested at her sides. She was wearing jeans and a hooded sweatshirt. Paint was smeared at her cuffs and splattered on her raggy originally white shoes.

She stood up, her medium length brown hair curtaining her face. "Messed up on the hands a bit."

Sunstreaker looked back at the woman in the painting. He noticed the hands because he studied it carefully, but from afar there seemed to be no problem.

"Hair is astray…"

Alright, a little.

"Face is crocked…"

A little but minor, nothing bad.

"Body out of proportion."

Definitely yes, but he assumed she was only an apprentice. It was acceptable to be so messy at first.

"And the sky. The horizon doesn't meet with the sky or the sun. All in all I am not wondering why I am not getting any viewers in here." Her voice was humored, sad, accepting, and disgruntled all at the same time. Sunstreaker exchanged glances from her to the canvas.

He tilted his head and looked at the title. _"Woman and coffee."_ He cringed. Okay. Maybe it needed a better title also…

"I think those humans over there are missing out truthful art." He said. He didn't mean for his words to sound kind. He slunk away a bit. He was just angry that the humans could be so simple minded. The whole race could be so simple minded.

She laughed. It was genuine but it was out of good manners. "Humans? Tell me, why do you think those _humans_ are missing out on this truth?"

He was about to growl and walk away regretting ever speaking to her. If she wanted to degrade her work and then ask for compliments based on his fact, he wanted none of it. Artists were to take pride in their work no matter how badly they messed up. There are no such thing as a failed work in the art world. Only learning and improving.

"Traditional art is hard to come by is all I meant." He huff and started to walk away. She held out a hand. "Wait. Please. What made you come over here? Away from the popular art? Away from them? Why come to this corridor?"

Sunstreaker was saddened by the question at first. Her expression mirrored that of the woman in her painting. Why the frag did he come here? He was bored but why here? He gave up art hundreds of years ago ever since-. "Because it was away from the humans, alright? I don't like crowds." He said in frustration cutting his thoughts purposely.

She smiled at him again. Damn that stupid smile. Why was she smiling?

"Humans…" She said as if it sounded weird to her.

"Yes, is that what you are? Human?"

She looked back up. "And you are?" She asked bowing forward.

He was about to say who he was but he refrained. "Goodbye." Sunstreaker simply walked away. He heard her create a sound of surprise and sadness but he forced the pained sound from his mind. He continued to walk away and with _each_ step it was painful. Why? Why was it painful? She wasn't special. Was she? She held potential but why did he care. He just came here to waste time.

He paused again and sighed irritably. A thought came to his mind but he ignored it. He looked back up and saw all the geometrical showings on the walls in front of him highlighted by the sun pouring from the windows. He looked behind him and saw the lowly lit corridor, dark and sad. Sunstreaker grumbled.

Why did he care…?

His scowl turned into sadness as he finally creased his eyebrows in concern. Would _he_ have wanted this? The thought made his spark writhe in pain and he had to close his eyes to fight it off. The calling was there before him. To start anew...but could he?

The holoform relaxed when the pain went away and turned on his heel walking with more gentle and firmer steps. He wouldn't have.

He turned into the corridor and saw the young woman sitting on the bench looking at her artwork. From behind Sunstreaker managed to take her full appearance. She was on the larger side, not too tall or short. When he was standing next to her she was shorter than him. But he was taller than anyone. Even in his true form he was a bit taller than some mechs.

Upon examining her Sunstreaker felt underportrayed. His holoform was a mirror image of his Cybertronian form only in human form. He was lanky and tall, strong but not built. His dark hair was on the long side, reaching his mid back. Currently it was tied back by a thin hair tie. He wore simple jeans, work boots, a polo and a leather jacket for appearance. Even if it was ninety degrees outside, in San Francisco you couldn't go wrong with style.

He slowly approached her from behind, his footfalls echoing around her. He looked behind himself seeing he was the only one there with her. He could let his outer wall come down right? He was doing this for him right?

He shuffled but his didn't seem to catch her attention. She had her head resting in the palm of her hand as she leaned her elbow on her knee.

Sunstreaker looked back up at the painting and titled his head. "The hair can be improved by using different amounts of water to the acrylic. Light highlights use less paint and more water. Base hair uses more paint and less water."

He paused to see if she got her attention or to see if she was listening. He raised an eyebrow and a smile ticked off at the corner or his lips. He looked back up at the painting. "Crooked faces can be solved by using face graphs. What you see is not always what you draw."

Pause. A glance. Look back up.

"Body proportions can be done different ways. With a good teacher you can find your own method to use to find the right style and appearance."

Pause. A glance. Look back up.

"The horizon and sky are only off because you used to much dark paint. The more distant objects are in a painting, the lighter they become. No big problem."

Pause. A glance. She was looking behind herself to him with a new twinkle to her eye. He smiled. A rarity these days. Even to himself. "And hands, well, I never really perfected them down either. So, I guess, I do not have any advice for that." He used his eyes to indicate the title. "A more creative name would help too." A shrug of a shoulder.

She narrowed her eyes and raised an eyebrow. She kept the gaze as she reached in her pocket. Sunstreaker felt uneasy by her creepy glare and his smile disappeared. He shifted on his feet and watched as she brought out a piece of gum, popped into her mouth and started chewing it.

She stood up and placed a firm foot on the bench and looked at him. "Who are you?"

He fumbled over his own words. It was a while since he had. "An artist, well ex, artist. I stopped a long time ago."

"You're only twenty-something. How long is long ago?"

Sunstreaker matched her still awkward glare. "What are you trying to get at, human? I am just trying to help. You were begging for my opinion a minute ago now you are playing detective."

The glare was softened and it turned into that stupid Unicron pitted damned smile. Sunstreaker was bristling now. Why, oh why did his kindness have to slam back into his face?

"Seems like you know your stuff, hot shot."

Hot shot? He did not look like Hot-oh the human term not the actual spawn of a glitch. "I do." He agreed.

She stood up and crossed her arms over her chest. In that moment he could have sworn he saw himself in her. She was using a skeptical glare now. She suddenly broke it off looking at the ground. It became sad. Sunstreaker was fighting to walk away. This human was careful with her words yet so reveling with her facial expressions. It made him less patient with the woman and yet...he was entertained by her.

"…I don't go here or to this university. I sneak into the classes here and try to learn but I can't. I try…but..."

Sunstreaker raised an eyebrow. Her raggy clothes weren't just raggy because they were work clothes. Now, he was now listening. "My parents and I became bankrupt. We couldn't sustain ourselves because..." It was a sore topic, he knew. She avoided it. "… I was let off alone in the world after I got out of my senior year in high school. My parents live on welfare now." She looked up. "You know where that leads."

This time the mech lost his skeptical expression as she continued to speak. Hewas interest as to why was she telling him her life's story. Did he seem that interested in her?

"So, what I am asking, I mean you know your stuff apparently, and this might sound like a lot but could…could you teach me, you know art?" She looked back at him with a hopeful sparkle to her eye. She didn't seem desperate knowing that he might turn her down. The holoform could tell she asked many people many times and they turned her down.

Sure he felt pity for the girl but how would he teach her? Surely she had supplies. Maybe use a fake credit card to buy some paint wouldn't hurt but where would he hide? How would he hide his true form from her? And he only knew Cybertronian art techniques. Human techniques were inferior to Cybertronian. He supposed he could teach a mix of both. He narrowed his eyes. This was if he was going to teach her anyhow.

He was silent for a while and this made her panic. He looked back to her. "Please, just a couple of sessions. I'll pay you back the best I can." So, she was desperate.

Sunstreaker cleared his throat. "Alright, first off." He started out a small smile returning to his lips. "I don't know your name."

"I don't know yours either and I rather keep it that way."

"Why?" He asked narrowing his eyes again. Strange.

"Don't avoid my question."

Sunstreaker balked. "I'm not! I thought it was appropriate!" He placed a hand on his hip.

She smiled at this. That smile...infuriated him.

"Just a yes or no will do. We could meet at my apartment every other day. I have the supplies. It's not a lot and they're not the brand name quality but it's something."

Sunstreaker shook his head. "Alright, fine, fine. Where do you live, what time?" He said standing straight again.

"Doesn't matter, whenever you want. Except on the weekends. I only work on weekends. I live in the Westside Apartments level 4, 34 A."

Sunstreaker crossed his arms over his chest. "I feel like you've done this before."

She stopped chewing her gum and looked away. "Yes, I'm desperate you know? I have to get this scholarship. The deadline is coming up in two months. I've asked a lot of people to teach me but they never give me the callback. I need this scholarship so I can get into art school. But every time I enter they turn me away. My stuff isn't good enough."

"It's not like that boring work over there?" He said as if he was translated her words.

"Yeah…I guess." She looked away again.

He relaxed his pose a bit seeing he was a little intimidating. "Anyone can do that."

She looked up and smiled. He didn't return it. "Alright, fine. I will come by tomorrow. I will see what you have and go from there."

She nodded her head. "Yeah? What time?"

"Whenever I feel like it."

His answer made her uneasy and he tilted his head. "I am not one to go against my word." Sunstreaker paused. Once again his words came out to be nicer than he wanted them to be. He jammed his hands into his pockets and walked away a slight pout still on his lips.

She watched him go and looked back at her painting with a hopeful twinkle to her eye. She was about to look back to him but he was already gone.

* * *

Nighttime driving was always soothing to the mech. His powerful v-12 engine roared and growled in the dark, practically declaring his approach on a driver and then the disappearing howl as he passed.

Going well over the speed limit, the golden yellow Aventador Lamborghini sped by yet another driver, the red glow of his taillights trailing ahead and dimming. He went by a cop car, but successfully jammed the vehicle's radar. He was safe from the human for now.

Sunstreaker shifted gears, his engine compensating for the change in speed with a guttural growl. He pushed forward passing by another Lamborghini. It was older, a classic model but it did not fail to bring a pained jab in his spark. This time he almost had to pull over. With a growl of his own he pushed forward. He had to ignore the pain and just drive, taking the frustration out on the road

For about a month, the mech had been stranded in San Francisco. All his radar, spark signature and navigation systems had been blown out and jarred from his arrival on earth. Now he hid and hoped for the best, that another Autobot would find his signature or that he would find the other remaining Autobots on this planet. The sole reason he came here, to rejoin his Autobot warriors. Maybe perhaps he came here looking for more.

He passed by another car, this time their horn blared at his dangerous driving. He ignored it, not even giving the grey sedan a side glance.

With curiosity Sunstreaker brought up the mental picture of the women he met at the gallery. He studied the image of her and he found himself musing over her smile. That stupid smile that made him so angry and yet assured and relaxed.

He found that he was slowing down as his thoughts brought him to a more relaxed state. Could this be Primus tempting his fate again? Could it be a sign to finally move on and go back to what he loved the most? Was that the reason why he didn't turn her down like he thought originally?

The question made him swim in his unsure and shaky confidence. All old emotions and past memories flooded his mind, open and chaotic. His spark ached and thrummed against its casing painfully. He wasn't willing to go through that again. No, he had suffered enough.

He made the picture of her go away and growled once again gaining speed. His engine howled into the night as he drove onto an exit ramp. This was all because of a stupid human.


	2. Canvases

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Two Canvases**

* * *

It was late afternoon when the Lamborghini found himself in front of the human's apartment building. Of course he had his reasons but those said reasons did not answer the question of why he was here still.

The building was located in the shady part of town. It was a little run down but the mech had seen worse. He reluctantly activated his holoform only changing his clothes from the last time. It would have been suspicious if he visited her in the same attire.

For show, Sunstreaker stepped out driver's side and closed the car door. Humans slowed their walkings on the sidewalk and stared at him in awe. Not because of him, no, but the vehicle he was driving. A smile appeared on his lips as his pride inflated. He was quiet gorgeous.

He walked up the steps of the apartment complex and pressed the appropriate button to call the human.

There was a long moment of silence causing the holoform to feel uneasy, the pride from just moments ago fading. Did he get the wrong building? He stepped back and looked at the sign in the front lawn of the complex. No, he was at the right place. He raised an eyebrow at the receiver and was ready to press it again when her cheery voice came through. "Yeah, come on in." He pouted just hearing her smile in her voice.

The lock was deactivated and Sunny stepped into the complex making his way down the halls to the appropriate apartment. Inside it was dimly lit and run down as the outside. A stench of cigarettes and something else Sunstreaker didn't want to classify was in the air. A permanent grimace was on his face as he made it to the elevator. He pressed the number four on the pad and the doors closed. The elevator was worse smelling. The light flickered and finally gave out leaving the mech in darkness.

"Great." He mumbled.

The doors opened again and Sunstreaker was almost reluctant to come out of the elevator. But in order to get away from the smell in there he had no choice. He stepped out and took a left until he reached the appropriate apartment number. 34 A.

He stopped in front of the door and was hesitant to knock. He sighed and did so three times. Before he could lower his hand, the door was opened in a flash. Before him stood the woman he had met at the gallery. "Hi!" She chirped.

Sunstreaker lowered his hand, a smile of his own taking place. He removed it with a slight grimace before she noticed. "So, let's get this over with?"

He walked past her and into the apartment. She frowned and spun to face him. "Yeah, come on in." She remarked.

Sunstreaker laughed. It wasn't genuine just appreciative for the sassy tone she used. He looked around already not impressed with the place. It was run down, cracks in the wall, wallpaper thinning, and the smell of cigarettes still stained the air or it was permanently stuck in his nasal sensors, whichever it still smelled bad.

He could smell an air fragrence or perfume of sorts trying to cover the smell. It was sharp and had a sting to it. It smelled like her though. The furniture was run down and the cloth was getting worn. He glanced to the left seeing a small kitchenette. He twitched his nose at the dirty pots and pans in the sink. A box of ramen was on the counter and a bunch of rotten bananas were sitting next to it. He looked around again.

It was clean relatively compared to the place's outer image. He let his eyes fall onto her again and realized she was walking to the kitchen trying to hide the mess. "Sorry, I haven't paid mind to the pace for a bit. I was working on something and I didn't have time to clean up. I've been busy. Usually I'm clean I promise..."

He kept the grimace on his face for a moment but let it fall. He appreciated that she was trying to look presentable as she hurried this way and that. The holoform took notice of what she was wearing as he watched her fix a chipped kettle on the stove. She had her hair up in a messy bun her bangs framing her face. She was wearing a long-sleeved grey shirt and worn out jeans. An apron was tied around her that had all sorts of paint smudges on them. Her sneaker's were the same as before.

She spun around and Sunstreaker quickly shifted his eyes to another object in the room. It just so happened to be a photo of her and apparently her parents. They were all smiling. It had to be from a couple of years ago because that is when she claimed they had left each other. He felt anger towards them. They had each other and they were willing to give up their only daughter so that could live off on their own? Pathetic humans.

They were the reason why he saw no hope in such a species. They were selfish and they cared nothing for family but money.

What he would give to have his own creators back...his-.

The woman came next to him and he knew that she could tell that his angered expression was becoming more prominent. She was about to say something but she backed away. Sunstreaker caught himself and relaxed erasing the expression. He didn't want to be rude. "Where is your work?"

She was still uneasy by his low voice. "Um, this way, in here." Sunstreaker followed her with his hands in his pockets. He had to be more careful with his emotions. He had to shove them down and ignore them, just like he always had.

Unaware of his internal conflict, she led him into a separate room branching off from the living room. Inside the floor was covered by tarps. Two ceiling length windows poured in sunlight from the late afternoon sun. He looked around at the walls all covered in works of art she had made. She backed away from him studying his reaction. He pulled his hands out of his pockets as he looked around. Scenes of the city, the ocean, a park, a man and a women sitting on a bench, a children's park, all landscapes of the city were scattered around. Cafés, restaurants, bakeries. Sunstreaker divulged himself in the true art he had hoped to find ever since he arrived here in this particular city. The acrylic seemed to have danced across all the canvases.

He walked closer to each one pointing out the mistake and errors but also the positive correct techniques. There was a lot to be done in some such as proportions but by Primus, _the magic_ was there. She just needed someone to show her what her potential was.

"How long did it take you to do all of these?" He asked his voice leveled not daring to show any happiness or emotion in his tone. He was...impressed. Something along the lines of nostalgia came along. He continued to sweep his eyes across the room.

She smiled seeing this. "I don't know, just a long time."

It was a normal response for artists. They never paid attention to the time it took to create. They were all too busy creating it.

This time he smiled continuing to spin slowly, taking in all the canvases. He stopped his head slightly titled in curiosity as his eyes fell on a dark corner of the room. A half finished painting was resting up against the wall. Sunstreaker walked over to it and pushed aside the one picture that was covering it.

Slowly he brought into the light. His smiled dropped and his spark fell. It was a half finished acrylic painting of a sunset. The horizon was way off and a large splatter of black paint was smeared across it. Sunstreaker frowned. He too had done the same to the last piece he ever created.

The frown deepened as he set it down on the floor again. She seemed uneasy by it. "I know it's bad but I was angry."

He stepped away from it. "I was too…" Sunstreaker's voice rumbled. That was when he caught himself but it was too late.

"I'm sorry?" She wanted to know more.

And she would not. "Nothing." He pushed by her, striding over to a canvas holder where a painting was in the making. Resting next to it was a dresser filled with used tubes of paint, destroyed brushes from overuse, and wooden pallets of dried paint. It was a distraction as he lifted one up. It made his perfectionist in him crawl. "Rule number one, human. Keep your tools clean and neat."

She crossed her arms. "What if I like working like this?"

Sunstreaker turned around and placed the pallet back on the dresser. "Then I can not teach you."

She huffed in defeat.

"What do you want me to teach you?" He said with an exasperated sigh.

She shook her head at the blunt question. "That's the thing. I don't know. I know I need improvement but only another person can tell me my flaws."

He tilted his head. "For one, we need to work on your perspective. If you fix that then everything else will fall into place. The university was it? They will take in your work in no time."

He walked past her and she seemed disappointed by his blunt observation. "That's it?"

Her unappreciative voice made him bristle. What did she expect asking a stranger to help her out? "What else are you looking for?" He blurted out. "I don't know what you want out of this university. I don't know what you think the problem is with your art. It is minor problems. I don't even know your name. This is a waste-" He used harsh gestures with his hands, his voice was deep and at times he knew he could be very threatening when he did not mean to be. He saw the way she shrunk back and he hated that. He caught his words in time to prevent further damage.

"Of time?"

But she was too smart.

The kettle was now whistling in the kitchen. She didn't pay mind to it at first keeping her sad shrunken stare on him. Finally. _Finally_ , she moved brushing a lock of hair behind her ear and went away into the kitchen.

Sunstreaker remained where he was for a long moment before he placed his hands on his face. He scrubbed them down and took in a deep breath. He didn't mean it. He never did. Yes, he was known to be an angry and a bit hotheaded but he never meant all the words he said. This time he was angry at something else. She wasn't accepting her art as her own and maybe he was just disappointing with himself...

Sunstreaker slowly walked to the doorway, and leaned his shoulder against it. He bowed his head and looked away from her.

"Maybe it was wrong for me to ask you to help me." She said quietly as she stirred a teabag in a mug. Her voice was so quiet and small. "I don't know what to do. Maybe I was just looking for a friend. Maybe I was just lonely…I don't know anymore…"

Sunstreaker lifted his head from looking down at the ground and back to her. She took a sip of the tea and exhaled. "I never wanted my life to come to this. Begging strangers to help me. My job can't keep me up anymore and I am on the brink of losing this pace."

She looked up to him and he did too. His expression was softer, at least he tried to. "I am not trying to guilt trip you, honest truth, I just need that scholarship so I can make money with my art. Hopefully, I can help my parents too."

Sunstreaker stood off of the doorway and towards her. He was relatively close to her bowing his head slightly so that he could look at her. "How about a name and then we can start from there." He murmured.

She smiled. It was sad and not like the annoying one he disliked so much. It made him sad actually. "Felicity, my friends used to call me Fil, or Filly, any one will do." She took another sip of tea. The smell of it was calming and soothing. Chamomile perhaps.

Felicity. He liked that name. He said it out loud by accident. She smiled when he did and he didn't mind. Her name rolled off his tongue like a fine drink. "Do you have a name or what?"

He paused and bit his lip as he came up with a random name. "John." He supplied quickly.

"John, huh? It suits you." She commented as she set her mug down. "Would you like a cup?

Sunstreaker could admit the smell did bring a calming sense to him but he couldn't. Not as a holoform "No, thank you."

She nodded her head once. "I mean my place isn't much but make yourself at home."

Sunstreaker relaxed as the smell of chamomile continued to brush his nasal sensors. "Do you want to start or…?"

"How about you? What's your story?" She asked the question far too quickly for his liking. Felicity gave her story to him but he didn't ask. "I rather not." He said in a slightly warned tone.

She hummed an agreement as a lock of hair came loose from behind her ear. "Fair." She said brushing it behind her ear again. "We can get started if that's alright with you."

He looked down and away from her. "Honestly, I haven't painted in ages. Like I told you before I gave it up a long time ago. If we started now, it would be like the saying, the blind leading the blind?" His words called for humor but Sunstreaker delivered it too flatly. Truth could be harsh.

She tilted her head indicating for them to sit on the couch in the living room. The holoform watched as she walked over to the couch, sat down with a huff, and waited for him to follow.

This Felicity was rather blunt when it came to invitations and what she wanted. With reluctant obedience the holoform followed and sat across from her in a love seat. It was awkward because of the cushion being worn down but somehow he felt comfortable. Maybe it was her inviting smile or just the tea was starting to effect him, if it could.

"Why did you stop?" She pryed gently. "No artist just stops creating art without good reason." She folded her legs to her side and rested her elbows on the armrest.

Sunstreaker shook his head. "I just did. Things happened and I didn't have the time to do it anymore." Half lie and truth. The war took too much from him. Far too much.

Felicity looked away and sighed. Her motions caught Sunstreaker's eye as she ripped the hair tie from her hair and shook it loose. Sunstreaker couldn't help but stare as her hair curtained her face so perfectly. She would honestly make a good subject to draw. He found himself grimacing again. Where the hell did these thoughts come from?

"You know," she started combing a hand through her hair ruining the perfect effect. "I know we haven't known each other for a long time but, I will listen you know. I am not really open about my past-"

"Really?" He couldn't help but mutter sarcastically.

She caught it and continued. " _But_ if you're open about yours maybe I could help you. Ever since I saw you seem to have this weight. I don't know what it is but I can feel it. You're tense, defensive, rough, but I know you don't like that. Maybe I can help."

Sunstreaker laughed bitterly. What could a sole, tiny, little human do to help him? What could she possibly do to erase what can not be undone? What could she do to ease the life sentence that fate had handed to him? It was a terrible, Primus damned _sick_ _joke_.

His sparked ached again.

He stood up and started after the door to leave. She got up quickly. "Wait!" She set her tea down and ran after him placing a hand on his shoulder. "Did I say something wrong?"

He harshly spun around and slapped it away. "Don't touch me." He snarled.

Felicity recoiled, fear in her worried expression. He spun back around opened the door and stormed out. She followed and held her stinging hand in her other holding it in front of her chest. "I'm sorry…" She whispered bowing her head. Sunstreaker was already around the corner. Her voice brought the pain of guilt as he knew it would.


	3. The Ideal Subject

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

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**A big thank you my readers.**

* * *

**Chapter 3 The Ideal Subject**

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Felicity took another sip of her coffee and crossed her legs under herself. She glanced up at the café's front counter and watched as people placed their orders. The atmosphere smelled of coffee, bagels and frying pastries. Soft murmurs were heard every now and then along with a quiet laugh or two. This was her favorite place to come and relax. A better moment outside her dingy apartment and her weekend night job.

A sigh came from her and she lifted the mug, taking a sip. Outside she heard a loud rev of a car engine. She paid no mind. It was just a nuisance ruining the peace for a small moment. Felicity swallowed and looked down at her sketch book. So far, upon the blank page, there was only her coffee mug sketched in it. After yesterdays' incident she couldn't paint or draw. Hell, she didn't even get much sleep.

All because of a simple polite gesture.

She was only trying to help him. Why did he react so harshly? Was it really something she said? He was but a stranger but something about him...she didn't want to give him up. Not yet.

Felicity was never the one for any sort of conflicts. She was sensitive to anger, loud voices, and harsh words and whenever she did come into contact with any of them she wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out. Yesterday was no different. Maybe that is why she didn't paint or draw last night. Even if he scared her a bit...she had to know more.

She looked up at the clock mocking six thirty. A groan from her throat. She hated being up so early. The woman couldn't help it, though. Once she was tired of trying to fall asleep she came here to seek some sort of relaxation and relief. The coffee helped, but only so much.

As she lifted her mug to her lips for another sip, the bell attached to the entrance door rang signaling another customer coming into the little café. She realized the footfalls were coming toward her and she smiled recognizing those steps anywhere. She placed her mug down not taking a drink for now. "So now you're stalking me, huh?" She never turned around.

He was silent for a moment. "You'd be surprised how much I drive around." She didn't turn around just yet. Felicity waited for him to speak before she did. She heard him sigh before he spoke. "I want to say…sorry."

She laughed. It was soft but genuine. That apology meant the world to her. And for that she would accept it. But not his way. She turned around wrapping an arm around the back of her chair. She looked up at him. "Wow, that sounded like it hurt."

"Sort of." He said with a shrug. The woman watched as he indicated if he could sit down with her. She nodded with her smile still on her face.

"Whatever…" She said wistfully turning around facing him as he sat.

"Whatever?"

"Yeah, it's fine." She bit her lip. Should she take the blame? Maybe...she wanted to see where this went. I guess I was overstepping my boundaries yesterday. I understand why you snapped. I do that a lot actually…" She bowed her head and took a sip of her coffee.

The holoform hummed and looked away. "Highly doubt the last part. So, why do you take blame for something I did?"

She paused. She honestly didn't know. Yes to be polite but maybe more. She bit her lip. "I was being polite."

"Don't be. It is my fault and I apologized."

Felicity studied him with ceased eyebrows a sort of wonder to her expression. He was so odd indeed. "Accepted..." She murmured softly.

She saw how uneasy he grew being so open. Like a hermit crab, he went back into a shell. Yeah, that's what it was with him. If you got to close he closed up. She was onto him.

"So, you're not suspicious how I found you?

Felicity shrugged. Honestly she wasn't. "Not really. A lot of people know I come here, especially the people who work here. Figured you asked around for me?"

* * *

Sunstreaker cringed, feeling her eyes study him. "Sure." He actually did stalk her down until he found her bio-signature. He made an effort to find Felicity because he truly did feel sorry for snapping at her like that. It was beyond proper and rude…

He looked down at the table seeing her sketch pad with all sorts of different pencils and erasers scattered about. A smirk crossed his lips, barely at the corner of his lips. Sunstreaker leaned forward and took it without her permission.

She almost choked on her coffee and set it down quickly almost spilling it. "Hey!" She said getting out of her chair and swiping at him.

He kept it away with a smug smile on his face, as he backed away only sitting on the two legs of the chair. "Not much in here." He said flipping through, tilting it this way and that when the pictures were upside-down or sideways. It was still impressive and charming.

"Yeah, it's because it's my personal sketchbook. I don't do much in here except when I'm seriously in a rut." She said puffing out her cheeks in frustration and giving up.

He looked over to her without moving his head, that smug grin still on his face. Felicity finally realized that he was flipping through the pages gently all this time and took great care with it. She backed away and placed her hands in her lap in defeat.

Sunstreaker looked over and saw her saddened expression. "You know for a femme who seems like she knows what she's doing, you seem lost." He pointed out teasingly. He slid it back over to her and leaned forward.

"I can say the same about you." She retorted taking her book back.

The mech ignored her. "Draw that human over there for me. I want to see how you draw." He said.

She gawked at him. "Do you expect me to draw without my morning cup of coffee at six forty in the morning?"

"Yes, now do it." He commanded leaning back, placing his hands behind his head.

She looked up at him. "If this is a distraction for what happened yesterday, it's sure as hell working." She said in frustration.

Sunstreaker smiled at the ironic statement and watched as she picked up a pencil and started sketching out the man next to them. He was oblivious to her as he intently read the morning newspaper. Sunstreaker, however, watched in a trance as her face turned from tensed to relaxed. Her teeth were firmly gritted, concentrated on the subject too much. He raised an eyebrow at that. The mech never did that when he drew.

"Your jaw is clenched, relax."

"Shut it."

He rolled his eyes and remained quiet as a waitress came over, asking if he wanted a coffee. He turned down the offer with a shake of his head while concentrating on how Felicity's hand moved and stroked. It was confusing. Her techniques were everywhere. It didn't start from head to toe but rather she skipped everywhere and somehow she kept it harmonic. Her perspective was still off because of the lack of a simple skeletal structure.

When she was done she released the death grip she had on the pencil and exhaled as if she had been holding her breath. She shifted her jaw side to side and realized indeed she was clenching her jaw. Sunstreaker leaned forward and raised an eyebrow. She clenched and relaxed her hand, massaging it at the wrist.

"I have terrible carpel tunnel because of that." She said indicating her tight grip on the pencil.

"I would guess." Sunstreaker had heard of the disorder before. It was similar to Cybertronian hands sizing and cramping up as the humans would say. He too had symptoms of it every once in a while. But that came from his swordsmanship as well.

He shook his thoughts away and spun the book so that it was facing him. He nodded his head. "It's good for a two minute sketch. I know where you're getting your perspective wrong, though. You don't do a skeletal structure before you start drawing the actual details. You need to relax more. You're over thinking."

Sunstreaker was to continue pointing out observations but he stopped looking at the pencil that rolled his way. He creased his eyebrows and picked it up carefully. The mech looked over at the first human that landed in his vision.

He placed the point to paper. "Here, I think it would be better to show you like this…" His voice was shaky. Why…? Pencil was to paper but he did not move. It was skillfully twirled between his fingers. Why…? Embarrassment flashed across his features but only for a short moment before he erased it. "I haven't drawn in such a long time…" His voice was unsteady and shaky. He hated admitting to that. He was scared.

And of course the human sitting across from him, sensed this. She pressed her lips into a tentative flat line. A shoulder was shrugged and remained that way. She was scared to say what she wanted to next. "That's alright. Maybe...maybe we were meant to meet each other again for a reason, you know?"

When he didn't react as she thought he would, whatever that may have been, she flicked those green-blue eyes to him and back down. She watched as he kept slowly twirling the pencil as if he was discovering it for the first time. One finger over the next...and then back to the index. "Do you believe in fate, John?"

He stopped his twirling mid motion. He blinked once. Twice. He opened his mouth and closed it. Yes, he did. By Primus he did...no matter how cruel and just she was. But was he ready again? A breath of humorless laughter. As if he had a choice. Fate would deal her hand no matter if he was ready or not.

She reached over and placed her hand on his. He didn't move. "It's alright. I got time. Maybe we can stay here for awhile until you get back in the swing of things? Two months is a lot of time, you know." She assured with that smile he'd grown to hate and yet find humor in.

Her touch was registered and he shook his hand making sure he didn't come off rough or rude. Sunstreaker sucked in a deep breath through his nose, placed his feet on the edge of the table, and pushed himself back until he was leaning just on the two legs of his chair. "Ready or not..." He murmured to himself.

Felicity barked a mix of a startled and humored laugh as he placed the sketchbook on his lap. "Ready or not?" She repeated.

He ignored her and she didn't seem to want to pry. For a moment he simply got comfortable with the graphite. He did simple spheres to practice shading and did a value graph before he officially started drawing. It was hard but it was like picking up what he had dropped but a moment ago. It was coming back to him. Slowly but surely and the more he found himself relaxing the more he find himself revisiting those nostalgic times. Sad bittersweet and lovely times...

Felicity couldn't see what he was drawing but from him looking up every so often at a subject she could tell when he changed persons or objects. He scratched out many sketches in aggravation from messing up and used all of the available space he could on many pages. As he flipped the pages she could see his work. They were messy and sloppy at first but within an hour or so he was drawing beautiful pieces. He went from rough sketches to value drawings and then to full out drawings. He felt her observing her with uninterrupted curiosity and hope. Her smile grew more and more as she saw each piece. It made him smile in turn. He liked it when others enjoyed what he created.

Each one had his own weird twist though. And he knew she could see that. "I can't place my finger on it..."

"Hmn?"

"The pattern of the drawings they seem...alien. Like the eyes, they're so beautiful and detailed...like a photograph. You're amazing..." She was breathless. Her second cup of coffee was halfway done but long ago cold and forgotten.

He didn't look up but he smiled. The irony. "Alien?" He flipped the page revealing to her the woman in the corner he just drew. She hesitantly glanced over to her and back to his holoform. "No offense to her, but your work makes her look ugly."

"Because when I draw, I make my art beautiful." He said in pride. His chest expanded as he said that. He hadn't felt this...this feeling in so long. Everything else forgotten and fading away. Just him and the white of the paper. Just him and the world he saw through his optics. He reached for the pencil sharpener again and let the filings fall to the floor.

She smiled when he became silent again and that is when he felt her examining him. His face was calm and sincere. Just a inconspicuous flick of his gaze to her and he saw everything. She was so readable. Her eyelids were lower as she examined his sharp jaw and eyes. He caught her looking at his lips, possibly just as lush as in the pictures he drew.

He stopped drawing looking at her until she realized she was the one being watched now. It took her a moment and Sunstreaker found himself rolling his eyes. Such a funny human. Immediately she looked down at her cup of coffee and sipped it trying to act like she wasn't caught, she cringed and gagged. "So when can you…" She cleared her throat. "Start teaching me officially?"

Sunstreaker didn't answer her immediately. He set the pencil down for a moment and crossed his arm over his lap. He tilted his head observing those light green eyes lock onto him. He narrowed his and finally flipped a page keeping his gaze locked on her until he picked up the pencil. "Keep that pose." He ordered, finally ending his silent debate to finally draw her.

She was about to protest but she already saw him moving the pencil on the paper. Now she didn't want to move and ruin his drawing. Smart.

He was silent as he continuously exchanged glances from her to the paper. It visibly made her self conscious and blush at the same time. He smiled. It was small one but it was the best he could manage at the moment. "To answer your question. We'll leave soon and go back to your place. Do you have a subject for the entry yet?"

She wanted to move but she withheld the impulse being a subject of his will. "Well, no, but I was thinking about doing a piece from here. This place holds a special place in my heart, you know?"

"How?"

She wanted to move yet again but she smartly held herself. He smiled again. Funny human. "Um, well, I come here when I need to get away..."

"This place is kind of relaxing..." He shrugged.

She smiled liking his reaction for some odd reason. She studied his body but not too obviously. Hopefully she wasn't getting any ideas... "I have an idea."

A huff.

She continued on. "How about a couple sitting in the corner over there talking over coffee. Is that a good subject?"

He hummed erasing something she couldn't see just yet. Soon. "Something more…what are they doing besides talking over coffee." He asked titling his head.

"Erm…"

"Perhaps an argument? Maybe something from behind the window is the center of interest rather than the couple. Not everything is so straightforward." He noted.

"No, I would like it to be a couple just talking."

"Felicity," His voice saying her name made her jump. He paused seeing that. He hoped...He tossed the idea away. She was just a human. "It has to be more." He insisted.

Sunstreaker's quick strokes were now softer and he didn't look up to her as often. He was now placing the final touches on it. Still, she didn't dare to move. She kept her eyes locked onto him intently. "Maybe..."

"What do you feel or enjoy the most when you are here? Make that your subject." His voice was gentle. She raised an eyebrow at this.

He finally placed his feet off of the edge of the table and lowered himself. He shook out his hand and placed the sketch book out on the table. Gently he turned it so it was facing her. "What you feel makes the art come alive…"

She hesitantly looked down. Her shoulder fell and an unreadable expression crossed her face. It was almost sad...and that made him...sad.

Did she not know she was a rather interesting subject? For a human, anyhow? The pose she was just in was drawn in the picture except her eyelids were lowered into almost a sensual way.

Sunstreaker caught the blush that crossed her face. Indeed, she didn't know he had caught her embarrassing expression for that long to remember it.

The strokes were gentle and the lines were smooth. The shading was beyond perfection focusing on her lips, eyes and face.

"John, I don't know what to say." She looked at her medium length hair. The sadness was melted away for a smile. "My hair isn't wavy."

He wasn't used to her calling him by his alias. "It looks better that way." He shrugged.

"I don't know whether to feel insulted or complimented." She quipped with a mock pout as she backed into her seat.

Sunstreaker smiled and leaned forward cupping his chin lazily, elbow resting on the table. "Do you have a subject or what?" Sunstreaker wanted to change the topic. He didn't like it when it centered on him for long.

"I told you, I'm sticking to the couple in the corner." She hid a smile with her hand.

"You are really set on that couple?" He said. He wasn't shaking her decision, was he?

"Yes, my drawing, my entry." She said determined.

No.

"Whatever." He said sighing and stretching backwards. "We can begin with hard sketches and perspective exercises. Then we'll go onto liner perspective. Agreed?"

"Today?" She said in hope with a half smile. "Seriously?"

"Why not? I have nothing else to do today." Or for the next for that matter. It was a bitter truth that he kept to himself.

"That's great!" She said bouncing with joy. "You have no idea how much I appreciate this!"

Sunstreaker cringed at her enthusiasm but let it dwindle away to a faint smile. She was something, growing onto him it seemed.

But of course, he would never allow it to go beyond just faint amusment of this tiny human.

He stood up indicating for them to leave. She let out a surprised sound, hectically moved to dig for money in her pocket, and splayed the crumpled piece of paper on the table. He slowly raised an eyebrow as she quickly gathered up her drawing supplies and pad of paper. She was so clumsy, like a little sparkling.

Felicity stood tall and proud with a smile finally ready to go.

"Are you...all set?" He asked with humor, looking her up and down.

She nodded glancing at the clock. "Yeah, c'mon the bus should be here any moment. It's here every hour." She said walking towards the front door. Sunstreaker followed with a hand casually shoved into his jean pocket, a smug trim to his lips. "You don't have to take the bus, you know."

Felicity opened the door with her shoulder and kept it open for him with her foot, fondling the supplies against her chest. "Why's that?" She asked as he walked past her and onto the street. It was busy and sunny. A normal day at the Bay.

He walked and as he did he felt her eyes follow him, where he stopped, and stood proudly. "I can drive you."

Felicity let her mouth hang open. "Are you serious? Out of all the people I meet. Out of _all the people I meet_." She walked forward dumbfounded. "You have a _Lamborghini_."

Well he was the Lamborghini but to her he was but another human. Sunstreaker stood proudly with a rare grin on his face. The woman exchanged glances from the vehicle to him and smiled also. She was silent for moment and stood straighter. "You should smile like that more. It looks good on you."

Sunstreaker immediately let it fall slightly. He hated being caught like that. "Get in already." He said circling around to the driver's side.

It was her turn to let a stupid smirk fall on her face as the car door hissed open and upwards. The woman enjoyed making him aggravated a little too much. She looked in seeing Sunstreaker already comfortable in the driver's seat and ready to go. "Well? Hurry up." He grumbled.

Felicity seemed suddenly uncomfortable and fidgeted her feet. "Are you sure? Should I take my shoes off?" She peered in seeing the genuine leather and carbon fiber dashboard. "Seriously though, John. This is a vehicle worth not even half of my lifelong earnings."

Sunstreaker pursed his lips. He knew she was used to the low cost living especially the scene of public transportation. Felicity looked down at herself as if to confirm her thoughts.

She was living in the lowest of the low. Perhaps, she felt so unworthy of even being in the presence of such an expensive exotic. Hell, only the rich of the rich humans could afford his model. He only chose such an appearance for it's well appearance and it closer resemblance to his Cybertronian form. One person so low could only feel dismal standing before him. And this he could understand.

He may have a reputation as an insensitive narcissistic. A murderer or even a psychopath but...he could sympathize and show empathy. If those that he knew allowed him to do so...just a chance. He rid of those thought very quickly.

"I'm sure. Just don't touch anything, keep your feet on the mat, and don't touch the radio." Despite his assurances he had to sacrifice his own discomforts. And for some reason he did this for her. This human he barely knew.

A slow smile appeared on her lip. His words were appreciated. The human hesitantly got in carefully, sitting down slowly and gently.

Sunstreaker tried to keep his holoform's expression as neutral as possible. He never had a human passenger before and this was sure as slag not as pleasant as he thought it would be. He tried to keep his thoughts away from human oils, dead skin flaking off, and other humanly functions as she sat down fully. Felicity turned to him and he relaxed knowing she was looking.

"Alright," He started stiffly. "Let's go." He started his engine like a normal human would do, pressing the ignition and such, and revved it a couple of times like he always did before he drove off. In the corner of his eye he could see the woman flutter her eyelids at the sound.

A sudden sense of pride and inflated ego came over him washing away the negativity of before. As they pulled out onto the road she clenched her hands into fists as his engine roared. " _Oh_ …" She breathed in surprise. He smirked. Maybe he could get used to a human passenger after all.


	4. Pallets

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

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**Chapter Four Pallets**

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The days turned into weeks and Felicity was learning more and more about her own abilities of art. Capabilities she found anew and re-learned with the knowledge John passed to her.

John was patient, holding back nothing when it came to telling her what she did wrong. He would correct her standing behind, with strong, steady, and guiding hands upon her own. Felicity rather enjoyed it whenever he would correct her like that. His body pressed against hers felt so protective, safe, and assuring. She found herself straying one time, trying his nerves just to feel his presence once again. Although, in due time, he noticed and made a quick nasty quip to focus and "stop being a sparkling". Whatever the hell that was. It wasn't heated. But his cheeks were and to this Felicity felt victorious. Why? Who knew. These feelings were strange.

At times he was specifically patient and kind, using low and gentle tones that sounded as if he were thinking out loud than actually teaching. It was a rare glimpse into the other side that made him who he was. That wall that came down to reveal something more. And she really didn't mind it at all. She preferred it over his tense and snappy self. They would stand side by side drawing and sketching. She would watch him at times, sitting cross legged on the floor while she ate a peanut butter and banana sandwich. Her favorite meal. He was so handsome. Her eyes tracing his jaw and lips. His eyes so brightly blue...

He would usually take his jacket off and toss it on the windowsill before he painted just like he was right now. She stared and lost herself as he moved his hand and stood stiffly, almost but not quite, moving with the brush. His muscles flexed and relaxed under his honey skin as he dipped his hand for more paint from his pallet onto his brush.

Felicity could watch him all day. Drinking in his motions. They were graceful and just lovely. She sighed out loud and it was too late to catch herself. He would notice a couple of times say nothing. Perhaps for their own good...

* * *

Again, he felt her eyes on him as he painted the view from her apartment window. It was hazy but purposely done so to give the affect that it was a dream. Of course this had to be all a dream. Who knew that he would become so close to this human femme?

The day grew older and he found himself growing more and more tired. His frame heavier. He lowered his paintbrush slowly and paused. He knew it was coming soon...they were happening more and more frequently. Felicity, watching him so closely, noticed and tilted her head.

"Something wrong?" She asked lowering her bowl of ramen soup. How she could eat that processed food was beyond him. The holoform heard her get up and stand next to him. He didn't move to look at her. "It's looking great. What's wrong?" She asked assuming that it was his artwork that caused him to pause. What would she assume otherwise? He was just another human.

He slowly twirled the large paintbrush in his hand, paying attention to his true form. The feeling he dreaded the most at a time like this crawled through his systems. His spark suddenly ached and he couldn't help but let his eyebrows knit in discomfort. He was quick to wipe it away before she noticed. Sunstreaker set the pallet of paint down and plopped the paintbrush in a paint clouded mason jar of water.

"I have to go." He said picking up his jacket and marching out of what he called the canvas room.

She watched him with worry and surprised eyes. "Wait, What? Where do you have to go?" She followed after him.

He didn't answer as he turned around and offered her an apologetic expression. He truly did enjoy himself whenever he was here. And only now did he accept the fact. His spark pounded painfully again. "I'm sorry." He breathed as he spun back around and walked out of her apartment making an effort to not slam the door.

Felicity stood in the hallway watching as the door clicked gently.

* * *

And of course this happened more than a few times for the rest of the time he spent with her. He would stay until lunch and then leave the same way coming up with morbid excuses each time. "I have a doctor's appointment", "I forgot to pick someone up", and "I forgot the stove was on." She raised an eyebrow at that excuse as she mused over them again and again.

He was lying and she hated that. Felicity knew he was and that hurt more than the truth he was hiding from her.

And one day he didn't come at all.

Felicity did have his number stored in her phone. After much struggle he gave her a three digit number. Once again it was odd, but this was John. He was an odd fellow and for only a short moment did Felicity questioned it as some sort of new text messaging. To this he simply rolled his eyes and insisted that she would take it before he changed his mind. Felicity sent him at least five concerned messages.

He anxiety was getting the best of her.

Crestfallen she sat crossed legged on the floor with a cup of tea, looking over his painting of the view from her apartment. As the steam rose to her nostrils, she imagined he was there painting while she gazed upon him selfishly. She was starting to miss his presence. It wasn't about his gorgeous self but because...because she truly enjoyed his company. He was so very odd, defensive, and gentle at the same time and she enjoyed figuring him out like a morbid puzzle. She had come up with many scenarios to his past but they all sounded silly and out of some sort of cliché movie.

She looked away from his work setting down her tea and then over at her painting that was going to be her entry. It was half finished, the acrylic peacefully setting dry. A sad smile crept to her lips upon the two persons in the picture talk over coffee. She wondered if he would realize the persons in it when she was done.

* * *

Five more messages and Felicity didn't know whether she was being concerned, clingy, or just a plain stalker. She couldn't help it.

Her overthinking was getting the best of her.

She missed him and she was concerned. It had been three days since the last time she'd seen him. What if something bad happened? What if she said something wrong? What if he didn't like her and hated her skills? What if this was a joke and she was the punchline?

She placed the heels of her hands into her eyes. She had to stop. More tea. Drink more tea...Fresh air...Some air...

A visit to the cafe for an hour was made in hopes that he would miraculously show up. Her efforts were fruitless when he didn't come and made the sad bus trip back home.

Felicity sat on the couch sipping on her chamomile tea and sighed. Maybe...maybe he gave up on her. No, no, he wouldn't. He seemed so happy-so content. Something in his eyes told her that his stress and barriers fell down when he painted and spent time with her.

Her mind was over thinking, taking the situation into overdrive. She took another sip of her tea calming her nerves and attempting to wash away her thoughts. She was her worse enemy...

* * *

_Two days later_

It was raining.

And along with that was brought the moisture that made it more hot and muggy causing that bittersweet discomfort in her lungs. She looked out the window and hoped that she would see that yellow car she had grown to love when the their meeting time rolled around.

Maybe he wouldn't come? No, he would definitely come. This time he has too...She looked back at the television hoping it would distract her mind from destroying itself. Too many what ifs and how comes…

Watching the news was the better of the two. She didn't pay much attention to the claims of odd sightings of giant robots and meteors sightings all around the world. She passed this off as a conspiracy theory. If there was a definition of over thinking, conspiracy theories were it. She ignored how the stocks were doing bad and noted how cute the reporter was when he spoke. But maybe she noted a panini recipe with their cooking segment but nothing more.

The human crossed her legs on the couch and closed her eyes. Maybe a nap would do her some good. Her mind needed to shut off for a while…

A rumble rolled outside. Thunder. It wasn't uncommon. Sometimes rain's brought in the cold front. Another came soon after and she opened her eyes quickly. Now _that_ was _not_ thunder.

She stood up, ran to her window, and glanced outside seeing the yellow Lamborghini parked out in from of the apartment complex. Felicity's lips cracked into a smile before she ran for her boots, jacket, and umbrella. She couldn't wait for John to come up and greet her. She had to go to him.

* * *

Sunstreaker sat in the rain parked next to the apartment complex. He did not know why he was here. He had left her for so long. He had seen her messages and ignored them in hopes she would leave him alone. But no she was truly concerned for him.

Today he didn't bother to look for shelter from the rain but rather invited it. The rain thumping against his hood, and the rippling of the water at his sides was soothing washing away the last of his bristling anger and pain. His engine was running, hiccuping every moment or so as his spark pulled on its casing uneasily.

This time was different. This time it was lasting too long.

No matter how bad it became he never dared to let a single sound escape him as humans walked by with an umbrella or coats wrapped around them.

His vents took in the muggy air and his coolant systems struggled to fight off the heat from his stress. _Primus…_ Again he felt his spark chamber wanting to concave on itself.

Sunstreaker came here…he came here because of her. Maybe she could make it go away. Maybe she could sooth his uneasy, broken spark.

Maybe he could trust her with his secret. He couldn't do this alone...not anymore. No. That was his spark talking. _Alone._ No, he didn't need anyone!

A strained whine came from under the hood. He bit back another growl. He had to see her, Felicity, he had to Felicity again. Just once more...his spark pulled toward her.

So caught up with his own thoughts he didn't notice a human running out from the apartment complex come relatively close and suddenly stop next to him. The human had an umbrella and she was staring at him peering into his heavily tinted windows windows. Sunstreaker finally realized it was Felicity.

His spark lept at her presence. Despite his pain he activated the holoform to avoid suspicion. He appeared in the driver's seat, stepped out, and walked over to her.

She smiled upon seeing him and it made his spark soar but at the same time thrum uneasily. It was gone when she became angry and rightfully so."Where have you been!? What the hell?" She placed a hand out in a "what are you doing?" manner.

"Felicity...I have to..." He had to tell her the truth...

Despite his determination, halfway over to her, he gripped his chest and doubled over. If it wasn't raining she would have seen his holoform flicker. It was just too much...He didn't know how long he could sustain his holoform. It was taking too much energy from his frame. It would only make the withdrawal worse...

"John!" She dashed forward catching him at the wrong moment to cause her to toss the umbrella aside. She had misjudged his weight, and ended up falling to the ground with him curled on her lap. He was shivering violently as the rain started to mat his hair and clothes. She too was becoming the same way as the rain kept relentlessly pouring down from the sky. With dimmed blue eyes he saw Felicity was now becoming panicked.

A pained gasp came from him and she tried to hold him close to her. She backed away brushing a hand down the side of his face. It felt nice. "What's happening!? Oh God, we need to get you to a hospital." She declared out loud. Silly human. It was more to assure herself than him.

Through his clenched teeth he gripped her shoulder and bit out a "No".

She kept holding him close as his shaking grew worse. Strangled gasps and pitiful whines came from his throat soon after. Was pride tossed away? Perhaps. Did he care? Well, not really. For once it felt good to let the walls come down. To be held and perhaps... were those tears coming from his closed eyes?

Was it the rain?

She reached over for her umbrella and brought it over them. The rain stopped stinging his face. He looked up to the frantic human, hair clinging to her chubby face and lips. She was soaked.

Silly human. Wouldn't she catch a cold or whatever…?

Felicity brought out her cell phone form her pocket. It was soaked and he doubted that it would work now. "I' m calling an ambulance."

"I'm fine." He bit reaching up to grip the phone. Another wave of pain that came from his spark. His hand slide from her hand to her shoulder finding purchase there to grip it tight. A startled pained gasp was her reaction upon the death grip. Felicity once again curled herself closer around his body clutching his shoulder to her chest.

"Don't let me go…" He bit out. It felt right.

She shook her head. "Tell me what is happening…"

"Just don't let me go!" He begged his voice giving out.

She creased her eyebrows in pain and worry. "I won't, I won't." She assured holding his hand and allowing him to clench her shoulder.

He saw Felicity biting back her own tears as he yelled out for the first time.

* * *

Whatever was happening Felicity knew it wasn't okay. Her mind screamed for her to get him to the nearest hospital but he refused and continued to do so through pained gasps and groans. All she could do now was be brave for her friend. And brave she would be.

She could have sworn that they were out in the rain for hours when they were but minutes before she got him to his weak feet. To this he made no argument and quiet.

"We need to get out of the rain." She hissed through her strain. He was so heavy. She placed his arm around her shoulder and forcibly and determinedly brought him through the halls of the apartment leaving a trail of puddles behind them.

Hair stuck and whipped into her face as she struggled to bring him to the elevator. Harshly she lost her footing, lost balance, and accidentally slammed him in the corner. Gasping she lifted him up. He didn't even bite out a pained gasp. Harshly she slammed the floor button and the door closed agonizingly slowly. The smell of wet dog and cigarettes dissipated but only by so much.

Felicity repeated her apologies in a hushed whisper, brushing his hair back from his face. He looked so vulnerable, so strange for a man like him. So strong and graceful and yet…

_Ding._

She situated him on her shoulder again and huffed as the elevator doors opened. By now sweat and water was dripping down her forehead. He had gotten worse and more limp, now practically being dragged by her. She had almost lost balance again but successfully avoided colliding into the hallway wall.

The young woman made it to the front door of her apartment and brushed her wet hair out of her face, digging for the key in her pocket. She brought it out but almost lost him off of her shoulder. She quickly scooped him up once again and opened the door, her sudden shift in weight bursting it open. The woman staggered into the living room almost tripping on the rug.

She would not give up, with another huff of determination she brought him to the couch and tried her best to set him down gently. A curse left her as his body fell limp across the cushions.

Felicity went onto her knees and came face to face with him. She shook her head reaching forward and brushing her wet hands down the side of his face. "John?" She stammered hoping he was still conscience. "John!" She yelled louder, her strokes becoming more rapid. She placed a hand over his lips. Was he breathing? Barely?!

He was so cold and damp. "Hang on, Hang on..."

She stood tall on her knees and ripped the wet jacket off of the holoform. She hesitated to take his soaked shirt off as well but she did so revealing his skin...marred by countless scars. A gasp left her as she covered her mouth in shock.

She looked at him realizing dreary eyes were looking at her. He was still awake but…

"Felicity..." He rasped. Was he...pleading?

And she panicked looking away. Who was he? This wasn't real. Why was...this happening? "You're-you're ice cold, hold on..." She got up and ran into her bedroom to retrieve a space heater. She ignored the questions that knocked at her brain. Making sure he was okay was her priority. Not his scars or whatever _the fuck_ was happening.

She plugged it in near them and it came to life with a whirr. The lamp flickered out for a moment before the electricity was balanced and the heater came to life. She made sure she'd set it on the table pointing at him. The last thing she wanted was for him to catch a cold. She placed her hand in front of it making sure it grew hot. Quickly she turned around and fell by his side again still sopping wet. A shiver ran through her but she ignored it.

Attentively she watched as his body grew stiff again. Was he not warm? No, that wasn't that at all. He didn't open his eyes as another yell was bit back. "It's okay…I am here." She said gripping his hand tightly in hers. She held it close to her chest and reached out with her other hand placing it upon his forehead.

Moments later, too long to accurately measure, the rain was finally letting up but the clouds weren't going away just yet. She was shivering by now her clothes smelling against her heated and muggy body. A puddle had grown under her and the couch had grown sopping wet. She had been looking outside when the rain stopped and now looked back to him. He was still. "John?" She asked.

He didn't reply. She felt his hand become limp against hers. She panicked. "Oh no, no, no. John!" She immediately leaned forward pressing her ear to his chest. She heard no heartbeat.

She released his hand and quickly stood up and ran into her bedroom to get her phone. "Where is it, where is it. Oh my god..." The woman finally found it under a pile of art magazines and rushed back out to the living room. Before Felicity could call 911 she dropped her phone. The spot where he was just laying was empty. "John?" She called out.

"John?!" She heard the familiar roar of his sports car and ran to the window. She gave a quick glance out and watched with disbelief as the yellow vehicle drove off.

And that us when her mind raced.

There was no explanation for this. No reason. How could he run out so fast? She was gone for a moment! What was happening to him? Why show up here if something was wrong with him?

_What the hell was happening?_


	5. Answers

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Five Answers**

* * *

_Two days later._

Felicity sat facing the front door arms crossed over her chest. She had been ever since she had heard the yellow Lamborghini rumble and pull up next to her apartment building. A permanent scowl was on her face but morphed into a critical glare. The door would have burst into flames if the glare grew any hotter.

A few moments later, the knock at the door finally came and she didn't get up immediately. She remained where she was.

"Felicity…we need to talk." She heard his leveled voice from behind the wooden door. Hell yes, they needed to talk.

She waited a moment more but the need for answers override her need to keep a grudge. Finally she marched to the door and just for good measure she waited. Answers would come soon.

"I know you're right there." He said in an exasperated tone.

She exhaled with a huff of aggravation and opened the door only so the chain was keeping it from opening further. "You have a lot of explaining to do, John." She hissed.

He looked her in the eyes. "My name is not John." He said quickly. "Can I come in?"

Felicity balked. "Wow, okay. You expect me to let you in now? Who are you then? For real this time. I want no bullshit." She rarely swore but when she did it was for good reason. What happened the last time? How did he leave so fast? Why did he come after missing for days?

"Felicity please, I need to tell you something." He was begging and she never heard him beg before. Was he this desperate?

"Yeah you do! How do you expect me to let you waltz right into here after that episode, huh?" She moved her face closer to his the chain cutting across her fiery eyes. "What the hell is going on!?"

"If you let me in I'll answer all your questions and tell you the truth!" John not John's voice was curt and harsh but she did not falter this time. Anger was something she didn't like but she knew all too much, just from the time spent with him, his anger was all bite no bark. Deep down though, she would hate to see it for real...

The woman eyed him carefully and suspiciously before stepping back, closing the door, and taking the chain off. She opened it leaning her forearm on the doorway pointing at his face with a stern finger. "If you don't clear up things now, I will ask that you never come here again." And she was surprised to find that it was painful to say. But only because she always had enjoyed his company, his angered attitude that wasn't meant to be taken serious, his good advice, and his mysterious self.

It dawned on her then. Maybe she would learn more of that side of him today. Was he a spy? A foreigner running from his country? A murderer? An escaped prisoner? A-? She stopped her mind from overthinking once again. She had to have a leveled mind.

He kept his strong gaze on her as she lowered her arm and let him in. Slowly she stepped aside granting the unspoken welcome inside. She watched him walk into the living room and sit on the couch, afraid he would snap like a wild breast or cause some unknown trouble. But he didn't. He didn't seem to be in pain this time although he looked tired and stressed. Lines she had never seen before where under his eyes.

He was leaning forward with his head resting in his hands. She closed the door, walked over and sat down across from him. Felicity waited patiently before settling into the worn out couch.

She felt only a tad bit of pity for him. And she still cared...She hoped he would sincerely tell the truth.

"My name isn't John…" He repeated not looking up. "As a matter of fact I am not, I am not…" He looked up frustrated and troubled by what he was about to say. Eyebrows were creased as he struggled to form proper sentences.

"Yes?" She urged him, trying to make her tone as inviting and assuring as possible even though she wasn't necessarily feeling it. If reviewed over, it almost came out more impatient than kind.

He finally settled on words. "Felicity, do you know of the alien battle in Mission City not too long ago?" He suddenly asked.

She raised an eyebrow. The news was talking about some weird stuff lately but other than that, oh... "It was all over the place...something about giant robots...right?" Her voice was uneasy. Her mind suddenly went to the news she was watching the other night. She swallowed, her throat suddenly dry. Did he fight them? Did he have to have another name and identity to be protected from the government and the so called robots?

"Yes, yes, and you know how there were the good kind and the bad kind, that they were in a civil war?" His voice was becoming quiet.

"Yes, sort of." She growled. But how does this explain he pain you were in?! How you up and left?!" Anger grew in her again. But this time it was from the uncertainty of where this conversation was going. She didn't like it when conversations couldn't be predictable and John not John was anything but predictable now.

He looked at her with eyes that seemed to have sharpened and become clearer. It almost took her breath away. But not as much as what he said next. "Felicity, I am a sentient robot from a distant planet and I am here on Earth to search for the other Autobots who have so called promised sanctuary here. Can you understand this? I am not John, I am not a human." He belted out the information in an even monotone voice as if to make sure she could follow correctly.

And she did.

To the point of where her face fell and her mouth hung open in a disbelieving manner. It was a joke, _har har_ , funny. But no. He wasn't... _joking_. Felicity was silent for a moment as he watched her watch him. But a hysterical bark of laughter cut the silence. It was an unsteady breath, like her saliva caught her throat the wrong way or her voice cracked.. "You're crazy. This is _fucked_ up." She stood up and shook her head. That same laugh broke through her voice. He was crazy. This wasn't... "I think you need to go, like forever."

His expression turned desperate. He stood up as well and rushed her, taking her by the arms. "You want me to prove it?"

She squirmed against his hold her heart jumping and skipping a beat. "Don't touch me, you freak!" She struggled against him, the action unnecessary for he released her and stepped back. The John not John didn't back down.

"Trust me. Watch and then come outside." She did as she was told against her will. Something told her to dial the authorities to get the crazy out of her apartment but something else told her to trust him.

Another feeling do gut deep she remained and stood rigid. She stood rigid as the very being before her. The very man that stood, was suddenly no longer there. Felicity yelled out as the-the-image exploded into something...something like dust.

She jumped back and covered her mouth fighting another scream. "Oh my God, _fucking_ God…" She watched as the particles floated downwards into a pile on the floor. They glittered and twinkled out of existence and eventually disappeared.

She wanted to faint. The world was too heavy at the moment and this was too much to take in. This was a joke. No, she told herself that a while ago and now that excuse would definitely _not work_. Because here she was. This _really_ happened. He was...was he?

_Was he one of them?_

She looked around her apartment as if she would find someone else that had just witnessed this too. To assure herself she wasn't crazy. She peeped out a strained, stressed sound, keeping still afraid to move. She kept her eyes on the pile of light shards at her feet as they disintegrated into nothing.

The woman jumped, gasping upon the growl of the Lamborghini outside. Numbly she turned facing the window. The woman placed a lock of hair behind her ear and kept her hand there moving closer to the window. She pulled the thin curtain to the side and saw the bright pristine Lamborghini outside. Its head lights flickered as if they were beckoning her. Beckoning her to come outside like he told her to.

Felicity stepped back, shaking her head. This couldn't be happening. He couldn't be real. It was all a lie. He was making it up just so that he could, so he could...

She creased her eyebrows at her reasoning when she didn't come up with one. She lowered her hand from her ear and looked back towards the window. She had heard about the alien robot battle in Mission City but she never really believed the hype that they transformed into vehicles.

Another step back. What if he was telling the truth? He never went anywhere without his Lamborghini or he never appeared from a bus or anything. It was always from the vehicle.

Felicity shook her head panicked tears coming to her eyes. He told her to trust him. His words echoed in her ears as she looked back up again. John not John was sincere.

She creased her eyebrows again. He wouldn't hurt her, right? He would have already done that. Right? What if he was a bad guy disguised as a good guy? Felicity let out a shaky exhale. She was over thinking again, destroying the rational thoughts she needed right now.

A hysterical laugh. Rational? What was rational about any of this?!

And that is when all caution was thrown to the wind. It was tossed away like the jacket John not John wore. Tossed away to the wind. Because if she wanted to know if she was crazy, or he was what she thought he was, there was only one way finding out.

It was to do as he told and come to him.

She grabbed her shoes, placed them on her feet, and went out the front door before locking it. She made her way down the hall and then on the elevator. Her confidence was dwindling away and her expression was turning from stern to worry to fear. She clutched her hands in front of her chest as the elevator doors opened. The smell of cigarettes and body odor filled her senses and she fought the gag reflex. Hurriedly she made it down the hall and outside where she took in a breath of fresh air. And where her fate and answered lied.

There, in front of her was the Lamborghini. She swallowed hard, taking each step carefully as if the vehicle would suddenly charge at her. "John?" She stammered craning her neck. "I know-I know I want to trust you." She said with faked confidence that she absolutely did not feel.

She was five feet away from the car when the door opened, shifting upwards. She recoiled away placing a hand over her mouth, shutting her eyes tightly. "Oh my God!" When she wasn't eaten, or killed or whatever, and nothing happened she slowly uncurled herself and looked back at the vehicle.

She saw no driver. No John. No one. The car rumbled in it's idled state. Her legs became too heavy and turned to jelly. She tripped backwards falling on her bottom. "No... no, you're one of them! But how? All this time you were one of them!" She yelled out pointing at the yellow car. "You lied! What do you want with me?"

"First...calm the frag down, Felicity. It's me." The holoform appeared in the passenger seat and it caused her to jump again. "It's me." He soothed.

She shook her head, tears coming to her eyes. "J-John?" She didn't see as he got out of the car and walked towards her. The disbelief and fear was dwindling away as his words from before became truth. He was one of the alien robots that turned into a car. She heard his footsteps come closer and he crouched down. He held out his hand. "Name's not John, remember?"

She didn't move to meet those now understandable, unnatural blue eyes of his. She didn't want to come face to face with his doppelganger. Who was he really then? What was he? What did he look like? "Who...who are you then?" She gathered her courage, looking at the hand and then his face that was just a gentle as before.

"Sunstreaker." He answered.

Like the first time he had heard her name and said it, instinctively she said his name. The name was pleasant rolling off her tongue smoothly. To here, a human, it was strange to be called such a name. And yet, she couldn't quite get over the fact how much it was _him_. It fit him. She couldn't hold back a small smile that crossed her face. She let it disappear. "Why have you been hiding as a human?" She whispered.

"How about we go for a drive? You can trust me, I hope?" His voice was calm and stern at the same time indicating his impatience. Apparently his reveal took a shorter time when he planned it out in his head. Or maybe it did not go as planned...

Felicity looked back at the Lamborghini and looked back up to him and his hand that he'd been offering the whole time.

"You'll tell me everything…"

"Sure..."

"You better mean it." She pushed for a more sure answer.

"Yes, yes, I don't have all day." He said, his kind tone gone away for true impatience.

She took the hand and in return it was gripped sternly. In one fluid motion she was lifted.

The holoform shattered again and she jumped from the sudden disappearance.

"Get in." This time the voice came from the vehicle. Fear came back to her again. She stayed planted right where she was.

"Sunstreaker?" She called. She had to make sure it was really, _really_ him. His engine growled, that too sounded impatient. A flick of a smile wanted to cross her lips.

"Yes, we already went over this. Now get in, let's go!"

Still shaky about her decision she walked forward eventually slid into the passenger side of the vehicle. No, his form. She tried not thinking about that. The door closed after her and she jumped at the automated action. She was stiff as the engine roared to life causing her heart to flutter at the sound.

She felt him start to drive and she remained very still, eyes locked on the seat where a human should have been driving. Or whatever that picture of a human he had should have been.

Felicity remained ridged yet her heart raced. What would it feel like if she moved? Didn't he not like it if humans sat inside him? She remembered she had already ridden with him before. She became painfully self aware. Apparently he already sensed her tenseness.

"Look." His voice came form all around her causing her to jump, yet again. "If I didn't like you, you wouldn't have been here before or right now."

A steady intake of air was taken in. "Yeah I know, but don't you, like, not like humans?" She asked cringing.

He was silent for a moment before he answered. "You're the exception."

She didn't know whether to take the answer to heart or keep it the way it was. Either way it helped her to relax a little. Just a little. "Where are we going?"

"You ask too many questions."

A humorless laugh. "Damn right I am. You still haven't answered any of them! Also, still trying to wrap my human brain around the fact _you_ are one of _them_." She hissed.

"I am not going to hurt you, I am not going to dump you into the ocean, I am not going to run you over or squish you alright? Get that out of your head. I would have done that already. Trust me Felicity. We're just going somewhere where no one will see us." Sunstreaker explained as he turned the corner and another one leading to the highway. She watched the world outside as the driver less vehicle took her where Sunstreaker wanted.

Felicity gripped the center counsel as she felt him accelerate over seventy. They were only on the on ramp too... She could only dread the speed he would drive on the highway itself.

"Alright, so since you don't like questions." She pointedly eyeballed the dash. "How about a conversation starter? I'm dying to know who you really are."

The lull of his engine was a comfortable background noise as he drove at a consistent pace. He never went over eighty and for that she was grateful. She never liked going fast anyway.

"I'm an Autobot. I'm on the good guy's side in stupid terms. I come from Cybertron but our civil war killed our planet. We had to leave and," A humorless laugh. "Basically fight somewhere else. It just so conveniently happened to be Earth. Congratulations." He added sarcastically.

"Uh-huh..." She nodded her head once and looked outside seeing cars pass and go. "So the other side? The one that destroyed half of Mission city?" Another car, another vehicle.

"Decepticons." A pause. "Kill them whenever you get the chance." He added harshly.

She frowned, swallowing hard. "So this civil war. How did it start?"

"Where to start." His voice was caustic. "A bunch of political messes. Imbalance in the senate, caste systems, Megatron wanting power, who successfully became the leader of the Decepticons. Take your pick."

"And you? How long...have you been?"

"Fighting?" He finished softly. She expected more but he did not indulge her. Those scars she saw on his human picture. Were those a reflection of his true self? Were they battle scars? He continued on, his soft voice carrying over through the dash.

"I am here looking for Optimus, _our_ leader. He promised stray Autobots sanctuary here on Earth along with the humans but I see no sanctuary. Just an annoying planet where anything can get your finish dirty."

She huffed at his last comment. "And now?"

"I am stuck here in this city because my navigation, communication, and location systems were damaged when I crashed landed. So now I'm stuck until an Autobot crosses my way, which will be never. So now I supposed I just have to wait here, until I pick up some bit of information on the whereabouts of the Autobots. When I do, I'm leaving."

Felicity widened her eyes. He would be gone? He would leave her behind? Her words were caught in her throat. She felt devastated yet she didn't know why. "You would leave me…?" She settled on those blunt words.

The silence that followed was taken as him not hearing her, but she knew very well that he did. She bowed her head. "Oh…" She said barely a whisper. So, that's what she meant to him. Even if he was an alien robot at least they could still have feelings, right? She knew she did. But that was for his human disguise. Would she care for his true form?

"Your human picture. What is that?"

"Not a picture. A hardlight image. A holoform Physical hardened light to create a picture to our will. I could use it to portray any species, really. It is to blend in with the inhabitants of the planets we cross. I only made mine to blend in with the humans while I entertain my free time. I'm not just going to wait around on my wheels and rust."

"So, if you were human you would look like John?"

"The holoform is not John. It is still me. I said that to keep my cover from being blown but...I decided to show you. I trust you." He confessed gently.

With that she felt honored. She was entrusted with a huge secret to be kept from the other humans for his safety and theirs.

"You felt so real."

"Glad to know it works so well."

"Your scars...were they?"

"A portrayal of my real self." Sneaky. He dodged the true question so smoothly. "Yes. Some of our features mirror our holoforms, although we can bend them to our will. Some mechs prefer female holoforms or other femmes prefer male. It's based on preference and appearances.

Femmes and Mechs. Were they genders? Femme was a word for a female as in a femme fatale so it had to be so.

"So did you purposely make it handsome or are you handsome as your true self?" She tried a bit of humor. And it worked. A laugh. It was genuine and it made strange things happen to her stomach.

"Depends on the person and species. In a way I was...very popular with the masses."

"Wow, don't hurt yourself."

A remaining chuckle. "Never."

It was silent for a long while, Felicity passing the time by playing with the ends of her hair. Her eyes were half closed as she was in deep thought. Her mind was drifting elsewhere taking in the situation the best she could. She felt more comfortable knowing the truth now. But one question remained.

Why was he in pain the other day?

She looked up and opened her mouth but closed it as soon as she felt him decelerate. A slight whining sound from his engine whistled through the vents. "Sunstreaker?" She asked the name still sounding odd in her mouth. She leaned forward placing a hand on the dash. "What's wrong?"

He didn't answer. She felt him speed up again, changing lanes and driving onto an exit ramp at the last minute. She held on tight as she was knocked into the door.

She creased her eyebrows as another whine came from his engine. Felicity called him again.

Finally he replied but his voice was strained and tight. "I'm fine." Just like the last time.

"Oh God…this is like the last time. It wasn't...It was you. Your real body."

He growled. But not at her. "Yes, just be quiet for a second while I find a spot to hide."

She was smart to head his warning. Looking outside she shifted her glance this way and that helping him look for a place to hide. They were in the industrial side outside of her city. It was run down where the smell of musty diesel and rotten dust stung the air.

Her eyes fell on a rusty and worn out building. "Try there. That old warehouse." She pointed ahead.

The woman didn't need him to speak as he turned, engine growling as he slowed his speed, and broke through a rusty gate. Ahead, was the shelter he was searching for. He hurriedly but quietly drove past the wooden door that was hanging by the hinges and stopped. His taillights illuminating the dark warehouse in red. She paused wondering what he would do next but her answer was the door opening. Felicity jumped yet again upon the sudden muffled pop and hiss it made as it did so.

"Get out." He commanded harshly. Felicity did as she was told hurriedly and backed away holding her hands to her chest again.

She watched with worry and curiosity as he closed the door again. And that is when the true magic began. Golden plating to his vehicle form expanded, shifted, slid, bent, and spun in all directions forming a new shape against the darkness. She stepped back and gasped as the giant metallic being in front of her stood up and finally took form. A symphony of metal clanging metal and parts hissing and whirring filled and echoed around her until he was done transforming.

Who she guessed was Sunstreaker gathered himself before he clawed at his chest folding over with a groan. She backed away a startled breath coming form her. It was a repeat of the last time. She shook her head tears threatening her eyes as his painful groans echoed around her. Nearby birds took flight upon the sound startling her further.

She watched as he stumbled and fell to his hands and knees shaking the ground beneath her. His frame wheezed and strained as he kept helplessly clawing at his chest with one hand. Slowly she made her way closer to him. Despite everything happening, she took in his new alternate form. His golden plating was sleek and smooth and his body was lithe and skinny. Sharp plantings graced either side of his face. One that held familiar sharp blue optics.

The woman came closer circling in front of him. His optics were turned off but they flickered on again, bathing her in a cool blue light. Felicity gazed up to him in a mix of awe, worry, and panic.

But he in turn looked away from the woman as if in shame. Her eyes adjusted to the dark warehouse as she rushed to his hand where it was keeping him steady. Clawed fingers dug past the wooden floor and into the dusty earth below, clutching to hold steady as he quivered barely keeping himself up. She reached out and placed her hand on his wrist. When he didn't argue she wrapped her arm around his wrist.

"Sunstreaker, what is wrong? Please tell me!" She begged not bearing to see him cry in agony when she didn't know the reason. She had to help. But how?!

He growled and harshly pushed her aside. It wasn't harsh but strong enough to send her tumbling with a panicked cry. She bounced once before coming to a stop. When she collected herself she looked up hurt and betrayal in her eyes. Why did he slap her away? What did she do? She was just trying to help!

The mech collapsed on his side, shaking the ground, causing wood to splinter and a cloud of dust to puff up. He curled into the fetal position still clawing at his chest. He wasn't being harsh. He didn't want to crush her.

She hurriedly got up pain spiking in her ankle as she did so. She ignored it making her way around her friend and looking up to him. This time she was forceful. Bringing her hands to his face. She was not longer scared by him. Felicity only wanted to make his pain go away. Was this odd? Was this something she never saw herself doing? Yes. But no matter what. Sunstreaker was the human not human she cared for. And he was in pain. His chest...was in pain.

But she was smart not to question it. She looked into his optics and continued to stroke what she knew were his cheeks. "I won't leave you." Felicity grounded out in determination.

His face was twisted into a permanent pained grimace when his optics shut off yet again. He looked away ripping the grip from her. Sunstreaker gasped and shuttered, biting back a strangle yell.

She stood still when he finally looked back to her. Sadness, pain, and devastation were written on his face. "Bond…withdrawal…" Was all he could bite through before he freely let an agonizing yell from his throat.

Felicity cringed from the sound and backed away. "Alright, Alright…" She didn't know if it was to soothe her or Sunstreaker.

"My…gone…" His voice was beyond devastation or sadness.

Felicity shook her head becoming ever more confused. She was just a mere artist want-a-be. How did her life come to this? She had no idea what to do to soothe his pain or to get rid of it. She went closer and clutched his neck to achieve the best hug she could give. She hung on tightly never daring to let him go.


	6. Black

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well hello there! A blast from the past now isn't this? Haha! Oh man I remember this chapter. What. A. mess. Haha! I remember the song to this chapter and I went back to listen to it. And it didn't do much for me. Of course back then listening to music like two steps from hell was like THE go getter of my inspiration. SPOILERS AHEAD (a warning for those who haven't read my story already) When I wanted to write Sideswipes death I received so so so many positive reviews. I made a lot of you cry and that was a very very awesome success in my view. I made the reader connect and feel. But what I failed to do was introduce Sunstreaker as a living killing violent monster Untamed and troubled by past demons when he was soldier and not as a gladiator as we learn in A Dark evening. This time around, re-writing it, I dropped a few hints in the dialogue between these two to hint of something more with Sunny. Back then my vocabulary wasn't that well and I didn't know how to "dance" with words quite yet. I was just discovering that talent in this chapter.  
> So when I have Sunstreaker just kill the Decepticon it was just a bunch of stabbing. Legit. I was also scared to describe bloody battles. Like I felt I couldn't get it right? I dunno. Pfft. So anyhow, I use facial expressions, lack of any true dialouge, sounds and word enunciation now. Its more of a show than tell when it comes to my writing.  
> Re-writing this was so charming because back then I overused the repeating of words factor for dramatic effect. Now I used sentence fragments because fuck grammar. :D All in all this brought back so many memories and so many awesome people who read my fic.  
> And always, always remember to never give up. Never give up writing and your characters. Never think you are bad or terrible. There is only improvement when you continue to write. Embrace mistakes, forget the haters and love your imagination and self. The rest will follow. :)  
> If any of you are out there, join me again as I re-write and re-vamp A Sunny Sky. Thank you lovelies!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Six Black**

* * *

Each tremor that shook his frame, shook her hold on him but she didn't dare to let go. She would continue to touch him. Keep that contact. Continue to let him know that she was still there. "I'm here, hold on. I'm here." She kept repeating small little assurances. But more to calm herself than him it seemed. Felicity still had no idea what was happening. All that she knew was that he was in pain. She closed her eyes tightly as another yell rolled from his throat. She cringed as it vibrated her chest.

Whatever this bond withdrawal was she hoped it would pass quickly. For Sunstreaker's sake.

_"Sideswipe..."_

Felicity opened her eyes at the name but also his voice. It was cracked and weak. The telling signs of someone about to cry or sob when it all became too much. Was he crying? Could his species cry? She backed away and realized that there were no tears but just strangled sounds as if he was. She brought her hands to his cheek plates again.

"Sunstreaker. I need you to listen to me. Tell me what's happening, please!" She begged brushing her hand frantically down the side of his face. "It's alright."

He struggled to rip her hold but she held tight. " _Sunny_ , _look_ at _me_!"

The mech immediately froze at the name and she nodded her head seeing that the blue orbs of his optics focused on her. Whatever she did it worked. She would roll right with it. "I need to you focus on me, alright? Calm down, focus. Block out the pain." She didn't know what sort of pain it was. For all she knew it could have been beyond what she could understand. But saying something would have been better than nothing.

She noticed that whatever was happening was slowly passing away, a mere tremor or so shook his frame but she kept her soft eyes on him continuing to brush her hands down the sides of his face. "That's right, focus on me. Focus on me..."

Her own tears fought to fall from her eyes but she blinked them away. Those were silly tear. Panicked ones because her emotions were everywhere and so what her delicate mentality. Felicity remained selfless, focusing her attention on him The mech struggled out of her touch but she ignored his pathetic attempt. She knew his ego was hurting because of the treatment she was giving to the mech.

He gave that up a long time ago when he had met her. She moved closer to him and held on him tightly. As the sun went down and throughout the night she would stay with him, never daring to let him go.

* * *

Felicity woke up feeling a gust of air brush along her body. She moaned at the hot air and took a deep inhale of the damp and musty air. She fully woke up, sitting up. Her body was stiff and screamed in dulled aching pain. Once she looked up at the golden mech she had realized where she was. She had fallen asleep on the warehouse floor.

She brushed her hair back and stood up realizing the mech was already awake. Heavy clicks and whirs came from his chest as if an engine was cooling down.

"So, is it over? Are you okay?" She asked hesitantly. The mech didn't say anything at first but sat up causing her to back away and give the mech some room. He simply laid on his back placing his hands behind his helm. He bent his leg so that the other could cross over it. "I'm fine."

She balked at him. The seemingly rude and out of place position was as if he was just lounging around like nothing had happened. Like this was okay. Like anything like this was okay. Felicity huffed. That was exactly what he was doing. She bravely walked forward and started to climb his chest. She knew she was taking a big risk but she didn't care. She wanted to break through to him. "No, you're not fine." She pried.

He glared at her as she stood firmly on his chest. "Felicity, I'm fine."

The answer made her bristle. He was lying. She could feel through her shoes that he was still shaking uncomfortably. She felt him quiver so slightly. She felt something crackling in the air. Something that would give way. His stress and growing devastation. She wanted to help him.

Her mind searched for anything that would make him realize she wanted to help. She just wanted something to make him snap. Anything to just-Felicity took in a deep breath and prayed that what she was about to do was something she wouldn't regret. "Who is Sideswipe?" The name enticed the reaction she wanted. He flinched turning to her, his optics brighter than normal.

"Don't." He warned in a dangerous growl.

She swallowed the lump in her throat. She pushed on. "Who _is he_?"

"Felicity…" His voice grew darker. She could feel it shake her very body.

" _Just tell me_!"

"I said _don't_!" He roared sitting up faster than she could realize. She was falling. She clawed for the groves in his chest but she still fell hard onto his thigh plating, skin slapping against hard metal. It was more jarring than painful, her head spinning more than she would have liked. Felicity stayed still, collecting herself as more sensations came to life. Her skin prickled and her head pounded. Her ankle screamed in pain once again. She coughed once as her breath came back to a normal pace.

The sting of tears came.

Couldn't he tell that she was just trying to help him? Did she care too much? Maybe...She hated how she was sensitive to his loud voice. She hated how weak she was. She hated how he couldn't see that she cared for him.

Everything was coming down.

Her body was grimy. She was tired, hungry, and her body ached. Not just from now but just from everything she had endured. The sting in her nose and eyes gave way to the sensation of relieving tears. She held back a sob.

Her desire to stay like that was cut sort. Beyond what she would ever feel, delicate fingers picked her up by her midsection. Hands wrapped around her rag doll body. She kept her eyes closed simply afraid of what she might see. But oh how did his cool fingers feel so good against her warm body.

Felicity relaxed upon being rested on his other hand securely. She kept her eyes closed. She was determined to. She didn't want to see that angry expression. She took in a shaky breath of air. "Why are you so mean?" She asked. "I'm-I'm just trying to help you…" She felt him flinch.

"I know..." He murmured.

Finally she slowly opened her eyes and looked up seeing that he was looking away from her out to the sunrise. For a moment more she looked at him observing his gentler expression. The woman followed his gaze and met the sun that was rising behind factory smoke stacks. Their smoke created momentary wispy clouds that disappeared.

"And for that, I'm sorry."

She looked up at him her voice numb. "For being mean? For hiding? For not telling me the truth? For _helping_ you?"

He was quiet for a long moment. Was he deciding on truly telling her? Who knew. That seemed to be the pattern between them. Silence and then questions. Silence and then words. She hated it. She wished he could just be him. "For snapping at you. For yelling at you when you didn't deserve it. For hurting you. For everything. For just being me."

She clenched her jaw tightly. Oh irony you bitch. "Don't say sorry for being you Sunstreaker. I rather like you to be you."

"You shouldn't get into my business."

"I should, because you're stuck with me. I know there's something more to you than just your pretty paint job and amazing art skill. I know you're in pain. I know you are more. You're holding something back. Please, Sunstreaker." She begged gently. She stood up limping as her sore ankle took her weight. Her fists were held by her sides. "Tell me."

He looked down at her, his alien yet so human like face holding an unreadable expression. She had to stay strong and break down that last wall. She wanted him to stop keeping whatever skeletons he had in the closet to himself.

"Tell me, Sunstreaker…." She begged stepping forward a bit. He immediately brought his hand behind her. She gripped it tightly and let out an exhale of relief.

Slowly she was lowered back to the ground. "Thanks…" She mumbled.

"I don't understand you. Why do you pry so much?"

"Because I care about you. I want to help you, Sunstreaker. I really do." She said never looking away or breaking their gaze upon one another.

The mech flicked his optics to the side of her. She followed it and noticed that her skin was turning red. A bruise on her arm was starting to appear. She continued to look at it even when the sound of gentle hisses whispered near her. Fingers were brought to her arm and were brushed down her side. She watched with gentle eyes at his so very gentle motions. Upon the touch her bruise protested with a sting. She ignored it.

"Sideswipe." He started in a hushed voice. She slowly brought her hand to the fingers that touched her side. The name was painful to say. "Sideswipe was my twin."

Felicity was careful to choose her next words. "Where is he now?" She asked even when she already knew.

"Offline. Dead."

Felicity closed her eyes upon this and swallowed harshly. Her mouth became very dry. A lump formed in her throat again. She continued watching his fingers brush her side. It seemed they were both lost in motions. Not that she minded. "How, if I may ask?"

The fingers left her side and with it a sigh and the gaze upon them. She watched as the mech shifted so that his back was leaning up against the wall. The metal and cinder block moaned for a moment but held his weight. He looked back at the sunrise. And she did too.

"I lost him in a battle. A long time ago. An ambush."

* * *

_They were rare. A split spark. Twins. Two halves as a whole. They were granted a second chance and they would spend it fighting the Decepticons that damned their lives from a very very innocent age._

_Sunstreaker, being headstrong as ever was determined and true to his promise. His twin? Not so much._

_"We are doing this. The Decepticons deserve to die for what they did to our city, our creators. Us, Sideswipe!" He hissed. "Nothing will change that just like the last time and the time before we argued over this."_

_"It's not right, Sunny." He insisted. "The Autobot cause isn't meant for revenge... It's meant to protect the innocent and weak. Don't you listen to Optimus? He himself says so." He paused shaking his helm. They were walking down the halls of their base. They were fresh metal right out of the academy. He was careful to say what he thought out loud._

_"It doesn't matter."_

_"We can't. We just can't. It's too dangerous. You can't just go onto the battlefield and expect it to be all glory and energon pumping excitement. it's not like that anymore. We are one spark. If one of us dies-!" In this instant Sideswipe was the one being level headed. Sunstreaker was too far gone, wrapped in his own agenda._

_"Sideswipe. Who can take us down? No one could back then and no one will now." A nudge of confidence through the bond made Sideswipe roll his helm in aggravation._

_A trio of mechs went to greet the twins but backed away realizing their heated discussion. A twin fight was best avoided_

_"This is war! Not a holo flick or match, Sunstreaker. You need to get that, please." He begged._

_They both paused and the red twin saw the sincerity in his twin's optics. But it was sincerity that ignored his pleas. "I know you're scared. We need to get by that. We need to. I know this isn't a holo flick. Why do you think I go out on the battlefield first?"_

_Sideswipe rolled his helm again a growl taking his voice. "You. Don't. Get. It! This isn't a 'we' thing, Sunstreaker! This isn't all about you! It always has been and always will be! It's not about protecting me or revenge or your stupid honor. It's about surviving and doing the Primus damned right thing. Revenge won't make it better. Nothing will! One day we're not going to be the winners or heroes and it's not going to be all you! When will you realize you never take me or hard facts into consideration!?"_

_Sunstreaker stood firmly where he was. His jaw was set. His brother was right. But he wouldn't change despite his pleas."I'm sorry Sideswipe. I have to do this." His voice was quiet. "I_ will _protect you."_

_And where the one went the other would follow. So Sideswipe reluctantly did follow, just as before._

* * *

"I couldn't. not that one time."

* * *

_This was an ambush and, like him, many knew from the start. The canyon rose between them as hellfire was rained down below. They were losing and the front was becoming more and more brutish. It didn't matter if Decepticon or Autobot fire was crossed, everyone was dying and not many were left, either in one piece or many._

_It was when he cleared through a group of front line mechs Sunstreaker saw the blade before Sideswipe could. The warning was shouted through the bond they so cherished. His spark fell. He couldn't save his brother. He couldn't reach him in time. A pain shot through his body seeing that blade run through his twins' crimson chest. He curtly stopped where he stood, stuck in time as he helplessly watched his twin from across the battlefield. His frame wouldn't respond. His body was frozen."No..."_

_His body shivered in pain as that bastard twisted the blade. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe moved in sync as the blade was torn from his body. His spark flared and sparked. Electric like light jumped from his chest as he saw his twin fall to his knees._

_He was still frozen but something was creeping up from his spark. Sickness._

_"No...no..."_

_Anger. His monster. The sickness he had felt watching his creators offline and now his twin. He welcomed the untamed anger within. His monster shaking the cage wanting to be free._

_"No, no, no...Sideswipe!" The bellow echoed across the field, overriding the sound of a mortar shell exploding in the distance. He ran towards him, his peds pounded on the ground uplifting scraps. His vocalizer became raw as he continued to scream for his twin._

_His blades harshly unsheathed from their wrists, causing the plating that didn't shift in time to be ripped off. Energon dripped from his wrists as he charged, bellowing out his anger. White tinted his sight._

* * *

"I thought it was beautiful."

* * *

_He was quickly upon the Decepticon. He was a larger, heavier build, but that didn't stop the golden twin from forcing his blades into the mechs shoulders. They could cut through anything. Easily they sunk into mental. His frame was shaking. His mind was set on what was ahead of him. He couldn't focus on his dying twin on the ground. The kill. The revenge. The energon. The monster he should had left so long ago._

_The Decepticon screamed attempting to reach back and rip him away. He wouldn't._

_Sunstreaker pulled away and rushed him again. Another sound, unheard and untamed, ripped from the mech's throat as he sunk his twin blades into the mechs upper back. The panicked cry of pain wasn't enough._

_Nothing would be._

_Repeatedly, blades were dug and forcibly shucked out of the Decepticon. It was enough to cause the mech to be overrun so quickly. Sunstreaker wouldn't allow him to raise an arm. Through gritted denta Sunstreaker growled his harsh mother language. Wet strips of energon slapped upon the ground and golden plating. It felt good. It tasted better._

_The mech could only take so much trauma. A large mech overtaken by such a demon was unheard of. Plating was ripped apart and protoform was dug and broken. Energon lines mangle beyond repair and neural nets hung from the blades that continued their assault._

_He could no longer take it._

_He wanted more, he wanted more energon. Kill._

_The larger Decepticon fell forwards and Sunstreaker jumped away. He was venting hard, his frame dripping in energon. He circled him. A crazed look in his optics never left as he watched the Decpetiocn's spark fade away. He licked his lips their energon trailing down his chin._

_A painful stab within his chest reminded him. His spark was fading. He wanted the Decepticon to feel more pain. The pain that he dealt to them both._

_Another crazed scream left him._

_Blades were slammed into the corpse. They were twisted, pulled out and twisted again. Sunstreaker remained focused on what was below him._

_He twisted one last time before the spark gave out in a show of sparks and light. Venting harshly, with growled breaths he watched in satisfaction. He kept his blades there, hands twitching to keep stabbing._

_And then he realized his folly._

_It wasn't enough. He died too slowly. He died_ too _easy. He was_ let off _too easy. Unlike his anger, his strength was dwindling away. The mech below him wasn't allowed to be killed off so easily. He wanted the mech to suffer. He wanted to watch as he ripped him limb from limb. But he wouldn't get that. He never would get that satisfaction. His yells were intermingled with desperate sobs._

_So, the twin stood, bathed in the Decepticon's blood that seeped past his armor and trailed down protoform. He raised his blade for more. He wanted to defile. He wanted more. First, he would cut the arm and hand that still held the blade with a tight grasp._

_**::** _ _**Stop.::** _

_He did as he was told by the weak and timid voice._

* * *

"His was my sanity."

* * *

_**"S-stop, Sunny…."** _

_His vents heaved and stuttered as he continued to sob broken strangled sounds. His arms and legs shook. His mouth was agape letting in extra air. Energon dripped from the bridge of his nose. He only moved his helm to look down at his broken brother. His chest was open and bleeding out._

_And with that, the fog in his mind disappeared and he was set back into reality. Slowly he was brought back. Optics turned back to blue from white. He sheathed his blades once again and looked at his hands and then the Decepticon on the ground. He felt momentary disgust as he looked at his whole frame. He had done this...in front of his twin. Instead of possibly saving him...he had...he..._

_**::S** _ _**unny.::** _ _His voice was painfully sent over the strained bond. He could feel it disintegrating._

_The golden twin looked down at his twin again and fell to his knees immediately, bringing him close to his body in a flurry of panicked motions. "Sides, Sideswipe. Hang on for me. Hang on."_

_Frantically Sunstreaker looked around the battlefield and took a deep intake of air through his vents. "Medic!" He bellowed desperately. He looked around again. "Medic!" It was a sob._

_A mortar shell whistled through the air and Sunstreaker prepared for the blow. It struck a nearby cluster of mechs and femmes, Autobots and Decepticons alike, scattering and ripping apart bodies, limbs, and the ground with it. He used his frame to protect his twin._

_Sparks flared and something wet pelted him but he ignored the sensations. He looked down at Sideswipe and gave him a panicked smile despite the cries of agony and for medics._

_We'll get you better. We still...we still owe fire-aft a cube of your brew. And...and what about Ironhide? He still hasn't found his blow torch. What about Ratchet?" His voice cracked. Ratchet...their… "You can't do that to him..." A shaky laugh. "To me."_

_Sideswipe smiled weakly as his brother kept going on and on saying sweet nothings. He shook his helm weakly, grimacing as the bond started to slip away. His sob was hysterical. "Sideswipe! Don't you slaggin' dare. Please. Please!" He shook his shoulder wrapping his fingers around the plating._

_"It's-." His twin coughed bringing energon with it. "a-alright..." His optics flickered. A shaky hand reached up to caress his brothers face. "Death isn't s-so bad, b-bro…" Those words were hideous coming from his lips. Helplessly, Sunstreaker watched the energon drip down his twin's black and shaky hand and quivering lips. He leaned into the touch with a broken sob._

* * *

"He was slipping."

* * *

_"Please don't leave me. Don't leave me. Don't leave me! I am so sorry...so sorry..." He was shaking, helpless as the bond agonizingly tore away. Like a fraying rope, each strand was snapping, breaking, causing them both to quiver and shake. Sunstreaker held his brother tighter against him as if his clutch would prevent him from slipping away. His hand that held his face slowly became weaker._

_Sunstreaker pined it between his shoulder and cheek denying that he was leaving him behind. He was still there. Sunstreaker bowed his helm offlining his optics, as he desperately gave his strength to his disappearing twin. He was reaching out into an empty sea. A line was cast out. But he did not reach. Blackness started to take over his side of the bond. His spark wracked against his spark casing. There was nothing. There was nothing!_

_Sideswipe's body became limp. Sunstreaker quivered holding onto him. He buried his face into his chest, clutching the hand that was only held up by his own. The bond snapped. Sideswipe's spark shattered bright until it whispered away in short wisps of blue mist._

_Sunstreaker lifted his helm slowly in disbelief studying the relaxed expression that was upon his twin's face. "No...please...Sides..." He cupped Sideswipe's cheek. "Please..." His frame was already turning gray. A whimper bubbled from his lips. A sob and then a long cry of agony, one of loss and pain, left him as he bowed forward over his graying twin._

_The broken twin held the corpse of his brother, rocking back and forth. Again, a long cry left him, his vocalizer cracking. His spark felt as if it was giving away. And it was._

_As so the law went: He was him and him was he._

* * *

"He had warned me yet I ignored him."

"He was gone."

* * *

_The golden twin hated everything. He hated how this life wasn't fair. How they took his family away. The only being he had left. What use was living now?_

_Seething, his spark suffered within his chest, and he in return. Every waking moment…_

_He stood in the middle of his quarters. An empty vacant berth mocking where his brother should have been._

_His art on the walls mocked what he had before. It was all the past, broken and twisted, and a big morbid joke._

_With a violent roar Sunstreaker gripped a small bucket of black paint and splattered it across all of the metal canvases. Iacon standing tall, his brother posing in front fo the sea of rust, him and his brother relaxing near crystal city's edge. It was all a dream now, the past._

_He watched as the paint slid down the canvases and onto the ground._

_A choked sound escaped him, and his spark gave way to yet another out of sync pulsing. With it's other half gone the spark was no longer able to stay balanced._

_He clutched his chest with a clawed hand and curled over, venting harshly. He fell to his knees, frame shaking._

_Ratchet had said he would live on like this. Slowly he would die and slowly he would waste away. He looked up to his canvases and growled. Those monster, those killers...the Decepticons would pay. But deep down he knew who the real monster was._

* * *

"I knew it was me. I did not listen. I paid the ultimate price."

* * *

"And I changed after that. Do I know this? Yes, I was always violent. I was...a front line soldier. I did and saw...so many...so many…." He tried to look for a word. "The war made me ugly but with him gone...he was my sanity."

Felicity swallowed slowly as she stared at the sunrise that sadly complimented the story. The red hues and sad pinks glowed along the horizon.

What had he done on his planet? What horrors…?

Felicity looked away not bearing the imagery that arrived with each assumption. "Sunstreaker, I had no idea…" She swallowed the lump in her throat yet again, tears stung her eyes. She bowed her head. All before, all the times he had gone suddenly, the times he spaced out and far beyond, how sometimes painting became too hard. The times he snapped or seemed edgy…His anger towards her wasn't justified but simply made sense.

Wouldn't it had been easier for him to tell her about his twin She huffed. It was easier said than done. How many years had this mech suffered with this burden? And to tell it to one mere human? It would be so silly. Or would it been?

Here he was now, told all of what made him who he was today. There had to be more. Hell, so much more that she may or may never hear one day. This being was a soldier, seen the front lines, seen what only she could ever imagine or hear through stories from others who lived it.

The mech hadn't answered or replied to her yet and that was alright with her. He could take as much time as he wanted. He had told his story in quiet whispers, harsh tones, and quick snaps. It was animated and painful to retell. She had listened intently not daring to speak or move afraid he would lose track of his delicate words. Her legs were beyond numb now. The woman looked up to Sunstreaker seeing if it was alright to break the stillness and silence that came over them. She moved to stand and he didn't seem to mind.

"I've been through bond withdrawal ever since." She stood legs quivering below her. She placed a hand on his side to steady herself. She swallowed.

"That's how split spark bonds work." He shrugged one shoulder. "When one spark dies the other will follow. They will go through bond withdrawal until their spark gives out."

Felicity clenched her hand into a fist. That sting crawled into her vision

He continued despite her silence. "I do not know if I will last a week, month, a year, or a thousand more. Until then, the episodes will become stronger and longer until my spark can't take it anymore. It will simply give out."

"You can't die..." She whispered. "That's not fair."

He only looked down at her then. "I won't, not for a long time anyway." He assured quietly. "And it is. My twin and I were born with this sacred law. All twins are."

She brushed the back of her hand across her eyes to rid of the tears. "I had no idea…" She repeated.

"And you would continue otherwise if I had not trusted you." He reminded her gently. "So be honored, human" He huffed. She didn't catch him sparng her a glance.

Felicity didn't reply turning to look out to the horizon again. The sky was turning from pink to a clearer normal blue of the sky. Once her legs grew steady she stepped away from him and stood numbly. Hands limply by her sides.

"You remind me of him."

It was so sudden yet so gentle. "Yeah?"

"Yes." A pause, "Sideswipe was...always trying to help others. He was...down to earth as your kind would say. He was an optimist. Times would be rough, but he always found the good." He said titling his helm wistfully. "He was good..."

Another pause. "He made me promise to keep painting. To not lose all of myself to the war. I never really thought much of his words. Not after I lost him. I did lose myself to the war. Maybe too much. I' m only here with you now..."

He paused again frustrated at his words not forming correctly. She remained patient. "I only agreed to help you at the gallery because it was what Sideswipe would have wanted. He would have wanted me to begin painting again…right now...with all the spare time I have. I decided it was time to move on. I suppose...this is the only way I can heal."

He turned to her but she was already looking at him with a lighter and hopeful expression. "That is brave of you...to decide to move on."

His optic ridges creased. They always seemed like that in his human form too. Strained and always confused, or pained. He made no notion of her compliment. "But I realized as time went on, I didn't just do it for my own personal gain...I think...I think I enjoy you." She knew it was hard to admit and she remained humble, though her cheeks flushed a bright red. No one ever admitted something like that to her before. No one ever told her such wonderful things. First, to be so similar to a great person as this Sideswipe? And second, to actually be enjoyed by another? It was something that overwhelmed her. She didn't think too much on it.

Felicity looked away and cleared her throat. "I don't think our 'meeting' was just some coincidence. I think it was fate. And I believe in it very much, Sunstreaker. I'm really glad I met you. I really am." She moved closer to his side and allowed herself to lean up against his thigh.

He titled his helm as he looked down to her. She looked up seeing that his expression was changing. His optic ridges and jaw relaxed. The mech looked back out onto the sunrise resting his helm on his crossed arms on his knees. "So am I, Felicity."


	7. Ashes

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Seven Ashes**

* * *

The rumble of Sunstreaker's engine lulled her into a deeper thought induced state. She watched as cars passed and went by faster than she would have liked, but she could admit, Sunstreaker kept strict and steady control on his speed and motions. He drove smoothly. At times she forgot he was driving.

She forgot _he was_ the vehicle.

It was silent between them both. His holoform wasn't in the drivers seat. She had found herself staring at the empty space deciding whether this unsettled her or not. She hadn't decided as of yet. And anyway, it was hard to talk without the fake human by her side. Talking to just the vehicle would seem...odd. On top of that, she didn't want to move or shift as if to break whatever abnormal silence truce they held between each other would shatter.

Felicity continued to mull over his story, the loss of his twin, his violent nature from being a front line soldier, trauma... Never would she had guessed he would have such a heavy past. She thought back to when he had begged for his twin during the withdrawal. It was something that still bothered her. Never had she witnessed someone in so much pain. It still made her uneasy.

And that nick name. _Sunny._ Her thoughts and mouth betrayed her. The nick name came out of her mouth a little too bravely. She flinched upon her voice cracking. "I mean...I'm sorry."

"Don't call me that." He warned her halfheartedly. He seemed to not have the strength to snap at her.

"Sorry." She looked back up at the carbon fiber dashboard. She swallowed. Bravely she pushed on. "Did-did he used to call you that or-?"

"Yes."

She bowed her head at the quick response and licked her chapped lips. Maybe that's all the conversation she would attempt at the moment. She was tired and sore and she could only guess he was too. She couldn't wait to get home and take a shower and sleep in her bed. She had wished that he had the same luxury. He deserved it.

Another rumbled was heard but she paid no mind to it as of yet. She opened her mouth but closed it, deciding again speaking again. Another rev and Felicity spared a glace at the rear view mirror. She narrowed her eyes at the white vehicle and looked away. It was nothing.

It was another hot rod trying to outdo Sunstreaker. The vehicle revved again. Violently. Sunstreaker suddenly shifted gears jerked into another lane. Felicity gripped the seat and yelled out.

"Primus damn it…" A dangerous growl of his engine and voice.

"Sunstreaker?" Felicity said. "What the hell?" She flipped her astray hair over and looked in the rear view mirror again and widened her eyes. The vehicle stayed on them. Her stomach dropped and a hard lump formed in her throat. A heavy feeling came over her.

"Listen. I'm taking you back to your apartment. I don't want you to come out until I call you, got it?"

"Is that...It that what I think it is?" She said looking over her seat and into the rear window.

"Decepticon scout. I picked him up on the way in but never got the chance to say hello." He shifted another lane and went off an exit ramp. His tires squealed as they turned onto the main road. He shifted gears again and straighten himself out starting to drive and weave through traffic.

If he was but one Decepticon he so called "picked up" how many more were there? Was it just him? Ten? Hundred? Her heart raced. "Oh my God." She closed her eyes as they almost sideswiped a minivan. Sunstreaker missed another compact car by a hair. She knew he knew what he was doing. Thousands years of driving should have been enough assurance but she still groaned. "I swear if you-."

The seat belt quickly snapped over her and she gasped as it slammed her into the seat. "Quiet, or I swear to Primus I will toss you at him." His voice was tight and stern.

She immediately ducked down as the white, now recognizable, Audi behind them straightening out from the exit ramp and chased after them. Unlike Sunstreaker, he caused vehicles to swerve out of the way and crash into one another. She turned around and realized she was breathing heavily. Panic came over her. She clutched her hands tightly onto the seat.

"Felicity, get your claws out of my seat!"

"Sorry!" She immediately clasped her hands together and closed her eyes. When she opened them again a growl of the white Decepticon came from next to her, engine howling and all. She screamed out and leaned away from the window.

"Sunny!"

The steering wheel turned sharply. Before she could register it, Sunstreaker veered sharply onto an ally road. Her heart sank realizing they were still being followed.

"Alright, we'll be there in a few minutes. I will draw him away while you get to safety." It was an order.

"What about you?" She said leaning forward and placing her hands out on the dash in panic. She knew he could handle himself very well, yet she held that same worry within her. She never would have thought she would be hunted down by a killer robot. That stuff was only in movies yet here she was.

Sunstreaker held her back with the seat belt again. This time he was more gentle. It felt just as assuring as his words. "Don't worry about me. Get to safety." He said again.

Felicity nodded but then cringed as he sharply turned off the alleyway and onto another road. Car horns blared yet no one was hit. The Decepticon however was not a cautious. A few pedestrians had to jump out of the way of the prowling vehicle. Felicity looked away in time to not see a few not move in time.

Another turn, another alley way and then another. Sunstreaker's engine continued to growl and downshift as he changed speeds drastically. The steering wheel and paddles continued to move. The brake and gas peddles shifted up and down in a steady duet with the sounds of the engine.

Felicity bravely stole a glance behind her and the rear view. She held the door handle tightly. They lost him. The grip lessened only by so much. She had a feeling it wouldn't be for long. "How-how do you think he found us?" She swallowed, her voice out of breath. He didn't slow.

"Us? He wants me. How often do you think Autobots travel alone? He thinks I'm an easy target." His voice was still tight as he turned and merged with traffic easily.

Felicity kept quiet, continuously looking at the rear view mirrors and out windows. Each road they went down was a sharp turn here and blazing tires the next. Smoke poured from his tires squealing against the asphalt. Only when he stopped suddenly did she take notice of where they were. Her apartment complex.

"Get out. Run. Hide."

* * *

Felicity nodded, and turned when the door hissed open. The woman wasted no time. She jumped out of the passenger seat and hurriedly ran toward the front entrance. She was stupid to freeze upon that all too familiar sound of the engine growling in front of them. Felicity gasped turning to see the white Audi speed towards them.

She backed away more when Sunstreaker's engine roared before transforming harshly. His peds stomped the ground like an angry bull as he stood his full height. He turned towards her. "Run!" He bellowed swiping his hand in a harsh 'go away' gesture.

Felicity did as she was told, the command vibrating the air around her. The ground rumbled as the Decepticon transformed and charged into Sunstreaker. She quickly turned away covering her head as the ground shook from the two titans falling to the ground.

She stole a brave look at the starting fight. With fear she shook her head seeing Sunstreaker kick the white mech off of him, roll onto all fours, and then his feet. With a snarl he forced his arms to his sides.

It was then that the sound of metal on metal made her jump. A startled sound left her as his blades were snapped out of their holdings. Her eyes remained on the impossibly sharp edges that caressed the late morning sunlight. Time was slow as her eyes traveled the alien glyphs along the inner blade. A shaky exhale. They were sinister upon the mech's wrist as he circled the Decepticon beckoning for him to get up.

She was witnessing the other side of Sunstreaker. Not her mentor. Not John nor human. But a war hardened front line mech that had seen too much and done so much more. And she wasn't sure if she wanted to witness such a side. He was a snarling dog barking as its prey while on the chain.

Felicity watched frozen in place, as the Decepticon got up onto his feet slowly. He started to mock him in harsh clicks, warbles and tones. Sunstreaker replied back snapping his helm along with the clicks as if he was possessed. Their language. It was so...violent. Just like he was.

This wasn't her mentor. The one who guided her gently with such delicate hands and movements. His gentle voice and fluid motions. So handsome and beautiful.

This was something else. Just as beautiful and dangerous. The motions made sense now. He did. These graceful motions of a killer and artist perfected into one.

* * *

"Hmm, I knew it would be a long while before I found you."

Sunstreaker circled him. "I think it's a charm others can not resist." He spat.

The Decepticon stood onto its scrawny legs. Sunstreaker observed. He was a mere scout. Oddly sharpened and armored. No name or rank but a lap dog of the Decepticon cause. He was no trouble. Sunstreaker watched as he too placed his arms out to his sides and revealed two long thin blades.

The Decepticon smiled. It wasn't friendly. "I am a wielder of the blade as well. I knew it would be entertaining to spar with an infamous Autobot like you."

"I'm flattered." He charged at him, blades poised and ready

He easily slid out of the way, his scrawny and lithe form dodging the blade. Sunstreaker remained focused stepping forward with each swing of his blade. What was once focused determination grew into frustration as the white mech kept dodging and blocking his attacks. A smooth laugh was heard from him. "You're a bore with those are you? No, you have to move _with_ the blade."

"You talk too much." Sunstreaker spun around him bringing his blade down. But all that he struck was the howling and hissing of air and the contact of the solid road. He looked up and charged at the smiling mech.

It was then one of Sunstreaker's blades connected with a thin blade. The white mech hummed deeply, admiring the shivering contact as sparks flew from one another's strengths.

The Decepticon glanced to Sunstreaker. Within his optic held a deadly glint he had never seen. The Decepticon as wise to break away. Sunstreaker spun, but just in time to block another blow. He grunted forcing the shivering weapon away and down into the ground.

Before he could recover, the twin lifted his knee and slammed it into the mech's chest. Another grunt as he conjured up strength to kick him in the side, sending him down and slide along the street.

Sunstreaker wiped his nose casually as he walked down the road. Each step more determined and purposeful than the next.

* * *

Felicity followed after them. Her breathing was hard and loud. Sunstreaker's command screamed in her mind as she became closer but she ignored it. She was stupid to ignore him, but...but she couldn't just leave him behind. Again she told herself she was stupid, naïve, and stupid all over again. She had to know he would be okay. He said so but her mind told her otherwise. He had thousands of years of experience. Yeah. That seemed to be the excuse for everything it seemed. Curse her human curiosity and empathy, it was her worst enemy.

She listened as the Decepticon and Sunstreaker continued to speak in their odd language. It was hypnotic and strange. Each, what she could only guess, word was disoriented, angry, and so very alien. She froze crouching as the ground shook again. She ducked her head and held it. When the ground stopped shaking she looked up and then down the street seeing the mech recovering from a blow that caused him some disorientation.

She gasped slowly as Sunstreaker walked towards him. Felicity slowly moved alongside him, eyes glued between seeing where she was going and how he walked with the purposeful grace he also held with his holoform.

The woman crouched down behind a short brick wall and froze as she watched him approach the final steps towards the downed mech. He lay in the upturned asphalt and earth. He seemed surprised by the blow but nonetheless recovered slowly.

Sunstreaker was standing above him now. A blade was brought to his neck. Gently and with strict control of the power behind his hand he lifted his helm to the side. She watched as the white mech kept his red optics on him, obeying the blade's will of its holder.

The air was tense as they continued to stare down one another. Optics were locked and held with a grip as steady as each others blades. Sunstreaker's clawed fingers rolled before returning to the controlled fist they were held in.

The air snapped.

In the blink of an eye the Decepticon swiped the blade away from his neck and spun onto his hands swinging his legs under Sunstreaker feet. Sunstreaker fell hard and tried to recover.

The Decepticon was too fast. A ped was slammed on his forearm and a blade into the other. Felicity froze as the dull thud made her flinch. It took a long moment to realize what had happened.

When she did she had to clasp a hand over her mouth to prevent a hysterical strangled yell from escaping. Felicity watched helplessly as the Decepticon brought around his long thin blade and placed it under his chin just like Sunstreaker had. Her breath was fast and hard now. Her nose flared, her eyes continued to look at the Decepticon and her mentor.

Sunstreaker struggled to pull away from the blade but with each movement the plating and muscle relays in his arm were torn and cut apart. With a hiss he looked back up to the white mech and froze as the blade Seductively traced a vital energon line.

Felicity struggled to remain where she was.

* * *

"Tides can turn so easily can they Autobot?" He purred.

Sunstreaker remained focused on his opponent. He liked to play with him. This wasn't an ordinary Decepticon soldier. His fighting was too neat. As if he were performing. There was something familiar about it.

Before his thoughts could deepen a thin blade burned against his neck. He grimaced away from it. He continued to stare down the mech, mind beginning to race to get out of his pin. He wanted, no he needed to end this fight quickly. If not, he knew there would be bigger consequences than those that happened thus far.

All around him, humans yelled out in fear and scrambled away. Traffic froze and cars were abandoned. The humans couldn't be harmed even if they were a race he did not agree with or care for. They were innocent. And innocence was to always be protected.

He clenched his hands into fists, struggling against the blade lodged in his forearm. He had to test the hold against him. It was strong and sturdy.

"Now, now, don't be too eager to get back up. I like you in this position. Yes, I do."

Sunstreaker ignored the mechs smug tone and pulled away from the blade, he growled, fists clenching tighter, and blade glimmering in the light. Upon moving his helm away from the blade that caressed his neck, his optics caught sight of a lone human sitting still among the chaos around them. Felicity was cowering behind a brick wall. Her fear filled eyes met his optics. He shook his helm so slightly. He told her to go away! He _ordered_ her to get to safety! Stupid human!

Before he could focus on the Decepticon again, he realized he traced his line of sight and found the human. "Oh," he hummed. "What do we have here? A human too curious for its own good?"

Sunstreaker didn't bite his glossa. The panic shot into him too fast for him to stamp down. He cared for her too much. "Leave her out of this!" He barked.

The white mech paused in shock. He looked back down at him leaning on the blade lodged in his plating. The shock was replaced with glee. "Oh... so you know it? A pet? How nice. I wonder what sounds it will make when I get a hold of it. You do know how delicate flesh creatures are."

The Decepticon curled his lip as he slammed the other blade in his shoulder joint causing metal to crack and bend inward. It dung into the ground easily pinning him where he was. Sunstreaker bit back a growl of pain and offlined his optics. He wouldn't give the Decepticon the pleasure he wanted. Fire bloomed across his neural net.

He onlined his optics when the pressure from his ped was lifted. Instead of relief, realization set in. He was going after Felicity.

"No! _No_! Get away from her!" He snarled, rabid like a mad dog on a chain. Cybertronian laced his words. He bared his denta gripping the deeply lodged blade with shaking hands. He gave up, loosening his hold, allowing himself a long exhale from his vents. He heard her scream and rare panic went through him. "Felicity!" He wanted to turn his helm and see her but the blade pinned him down. "Run!" He yelled.

Again he gripped the blade and attempted to pull it free. The blade dug into his fingers, fire biting into metal. He growled.

"Sunny!"

Her voice begging his name, ignited a reaction deep within his spark. He yelled out as the blade was yanked free. He sat up ripping the other blade form his forearm, the pain through his neural net never set in. Sunstreaker gritted his denta, spinning on his hands and feet into a ready to run position. He charged forward towards the Decepticon chasing after the human. His human.

Sunstreaker continued, frame moving with the grace he was known for. A blaster was brought from subspace. His aim was not the best, too skilled with the blade. Ranged weapons were not of importance to him. With a dull whine it charged. Only when necessary did he use them. Sunstreaker fired multiple rounds, all of them striking the mech until it caused him to buckle and crash to the ground. The subspaced weapon was traded for blades that were at the ready.

Before the Decepticon could regain his senses he was rushed by the golden mech. Below Sunstreaker could hear Felicity yell out in fear. With agility the Decepticon forced the energy into a flip sending Sunstreaker over his head. The Autobot converted the force to his advantage and landed on all fours.

In return, the Decepticon had his thin blaster from his subspace and aimed at the Autobot. With a smirk the gun was spitting hot plasma. Sunstreaker bolted avoiding the projectiles. Instead of hitting his mark the plasma struck nearby buildings with loud explosions.

There were screams from all around but one in particular froze his spark in fear. He spun and zeroed in on his charge. A plasma round sent brick hurtling into the air above her.

Sunstreaker forgot about the Decpeticon and his fight. He ran towards her, blades sheathing into their holdings. He ran though he doubt he would make. It wouldn't stop him. From behind he could hear the whine of the Decepticon's blaster charging. He was a fool to drop his fight. But...Felicity was more important. This human he had allowed to crawl into his life.

The report sounded. He dove for her. She screamed. Hot searing pain burned in his side. He yelled out, momentary static filling his vision as he scooped Felicity into his hands and against his chest. He hit the ground hard, the brick and debris from the building falling onto him.

When all was still and silent did he move. Electricity buzzed from his side, energon dripped onto the pavement.

Below Felicity whined with fear and shook violently. She was fine. She was safe. He moved, debris falling off his back and to his sides. A hot breath from his mouth.

He heard the Decepticon laugh. He was approaching slowly, pride giving way to that confident stride he held. Sunstreaker unraveled his hands and revealed a shaken up Felicity. He grimaced. "Why didn't you run? Why didn't you do as I told?!" He didn't realize his heated words were causing her to shake more. He sat up fully, remaining debris rolling and clacking off of his frame.

She was panicking. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" She chanted out erratically. He regretted his words. He was only scared…

The realization made him freeze. Fear was an odd emotion he rarely showed or felt. Not since Sideswipe.

"For a pet you show quite a lot of loyalty to it. For all the trouble it causes, I think it should be a burden relieved of don't you think?" The white Decepticon purred. His voice made him jump. The moment was gone, he gritted his denta.

Sunstreaker began to go onto all fours. His voice gave out as he growled, trying to ignore the burning in his side. "I need you to run. Now." His hand rested on the ground allowing the shaken human to step off.

"I can't leave you!" Her eyes shifted to the wound in his side. Her hands shook, as if they wanted to reach out towards it.

"Primus damn it, Felicity, Run!" He bellowed causing her to jump and become scared all over again. He didn't wish to cause her fear. He just wanted her to be safe. " _Please_." He begged. Upon his plea did she nod and move into action finally. He watched her for a moment as he stood and flicked each wrist revealing the two long silver blades. He turned away from her and stood tall. He was tired and weakened from the fire across his neural net. He stepped forward on a shaky ped. It was hard to seem strong at the moment. His mind was elsewhere.

"I am confused. Are we swordsmen or soldiers? Blaster to blade, and blades to blasters, it's all too confusing. Why don't we settle on a fine sword match, hmn?" He said approaching the unsteady Autobot.

Sunstreaker tried to calm the swaying in his helm. He shook his helm and growled. "You need to shut up." He mumbled, rushing him.

And just as before, as Sunstreaker slashed, hacked, and swung his blade the white Decepticon would simply slide and bend out of the way. He was slippery and it made the him more and more impatient. White tinted his blue optics as he pushed himself harder. He blocked his neural net, dampening the nodes to become numb.

It was a performance to this mech. To whom he didn't care. Perhaps to himself.

"Give up?" The Decepticon laughed. "Because I mush finish this quickly. I've had fun Sunstreaker of Kaon."

Sunstreaker growled upon the name. He yelled out in anger, vision becoming white. The Decepticon slipped up. A doge that was left open to parry. Instead of forcing his blade down the next round, he swung his leg around and kicked the Decepticon in the midsection sending him sliding across the asphalt once again. Using the spin as momentum, he forced his arm in a downward arch and detached the blade. Air was sliced with a deadly whistle and ended with a sharp metal on metal thud. Sunstreaker slowly stood and held his frame in a tense posture. The weapon met its mark in the mech's chest sending a burst of blue energon and light out from his chest.

The air was suddenly quiet and Sunstreaker heaved a few good vents before approaching the stumbling mech. As he came closer he was falling to his knees. Sunstreaker caught him with his good arm and brought him close to his face. "If you found me you sure as frag know where the other Autobots are. Where are the other Autobots?"

The white mech smiled and barked out a bloody laugh. Energon dribbling down from the corner of his mouth as he spoke. "I myself am lost Autobot. Finding you was but an order I had to fulfill. If I knew, why would I tell you?"

Sunstreaker forced his chest into the hilt of his blade, causing it to press out of his back. He barked out a painful cry, energon splattering on his face. Sunstreaker enjoyed the sound all to well. "Tell. Me." He hissed through his denta, face unchanged.

The white Decepticon smiled and Sunstreaker made it disappear by jamming the blade further again. The light from his spark was fading. They both knew it and the Decepticon shrugged his one shoulder, so casually. "This is not the end Autobot. Other's are on this planet. What they did to your half spark will be done unto you. Do not think you can hide or rely on the others for help and definitely not your human _pet_."

Sunstreaker felt the Decepticon becoming limp and growled. "Decepticon slag! Tell me where they are!"

"You do not realize? You are one of us...Not Decepticon nor Autobot..." A laugh that formed into a sigh left his lips.

The white mech's optics flickered offlined, slowly fading to black as he sank to his knees. He was now offline with that permanent smug look on his face. Sunstreaker jerked the blade from his carcass and harshly tossed the body away.

He was seething. Beyond anger. He attached the blade onto his wrist and watched the energon flow down it's edge towards the ground where it slowly puddled.

His words confused and angered him. The whereabouts of his brethren still lost. He was not one of them. Whoever _they_ were he would never be them.

He was he...and no longer _him_.

A roar of frustration left him. " _Primus damn it_!" He forced the blade downward into the same wound and yelled out a long suffering cry. It broke way to static and into a pitiful sound. He sagged his shoulder and fell to his knees, his limp arm dragging on the ground as his other clutched his blade in a morbid one armed hug. From behind, his acute hearing picked up Felicity approaching carefully.

He thought he told her to run away...

"He was the only hope that could've gotten me to the others...My only lead." His voice shook.

He never turned to face her. Slowly she continued to approach him. She stood next to him. From his wound, energon dripped into a steadying growing puddle.

She hugged herself and looked up, finally brave enough to speak. "You're hurt…"

Her tiny voiced made him pause. Sunstreaker ticked his helm towards her direction and looked down out of the corner of his optic. He saw her expression turn into concern as he willed his frame to relax. His shoulder sagged once again. His plating that was puffed out in aggravation slowly came back into place. Fogged air that was created from hot vents continued to steadily be pumped out.

He fully turned to her. He hated the gasp that left her. He quickly looked away. His optics...

They wouldn't change for a while. Sunstreaker felt disgusting. A monster...

Energon dripped from his forearm. The plating on his side was black, twisted, and melted no longer the yellow he so proudly presented. Felicity flinched as it sparked.

"...It's fine. It'll heal on it own." His voice was harsh but he was trying to be gentler. She nodded her head. Bravely he looked back to her again and she didn't flinch.

She walked forward and hesitantly brought a hand to his thigh. He felt her steady herself. He didn't dare to move.

* * *

"Sunstreaker…" She started, her voice was small and pathetic as she looked at the dead Decepticon. She shivered. The mech she was touching now, caused this destruction. Killed a being so effortlessly without a second thought. Her stomach felt tight. "I don't want to be here anymore..."

She didn't look up to see him open his mouth to respond. It was cut off by the growing roaring sirens that rang in the distance.

"Sunstreaker…!" She warned but he was already transforming. She backed away with a gasp and stared at the vehicle that now laid dormant.

What was the plan now? Was it to run and hide? Was she to run to her home and hide like he had originally warned?

Her home.

Realization struck her. She spun around, her hands splayed out of her sides to catch her delicate balance. Her eyes widened and her heart sank. A strangled gasp was left in her throat. Before her, the crackling of fire licked at the apartment complex and bared the innards that she had called home for a few years now. Only then did the damaged and carnage caused by the alien robots was realized and set in.

It looked as if a wild storm had ripped through upturned earth, buildings and road. Her home...It was completely destroyed on the one whole side.

"No…" She took a step forward but anymore motion was held back.

Before she could run to the building in a flurry of worry and fear, an officer caught her by her arm and pulled her away, claiming to get her to safety. Despite her pleas and worried glances at her apartment she was brought away from the scene. She didn't put up much of a fight. She was exhausted.

Persons alike rushed this way and that to secure a perimeter around the building and scene of destruction. Felicity was brought to a group of bystanders and was placed in an ambulance. She numbly complied ignoring the other frantic humans.

By then, the woman lost track of time. Was it one or two hours before all the fires were put out? She didn't know. Unblinking and statue stiff she continued to remain where she was. A few more people accompanied her. They were better off than her. She had seen it all. They had only seen bits and pieces. Their home didn't get blasted away.

Witnesses were pulled aside by curious men in black suits. One had pulled her aside as her minor injuries were tended to. Many unnecessary tests were done on her. The man in black didn't think otherwise. Her temperature was taken and a breathalyzer test was given.

Felicity was good at lying or he wasn't so good at his job. She lied, never seeing the other killer robot. Others had. But she would do everything she could to keep Sunstreaker hidden...despite if...he was the reason why her home was gone.

No...she couldn't; think that way. He was only trying to protect her. The Decepticon was the true evil one. Not him. She fixed the bandage on her arm.

Felicity finally looked up when the steady pulse of a truck backing up a flatbed got her attention. She watched as pulleys and chains pulled away the wreckage of the Decepticon body on the said flatbed. It was covered with a heavy black tarp and brought away with a rumble of a diesel engine. The only glimpse she could catch from the back of the ambulance was a skull insignia on one of the truck's doors.

She had kept Sunstreaker in the side of her vision. He played dead good. He was but a sports car that got damaged in the wreckage of the killer robots. "A shame," one person whispered. It was, but deep down Felicity wanted to see his holoform. He wanted him to be by her side. Even if those white emotionless optics replaced brilliant blues.

She wrapped the rough blanket around her tighter and bowed her head. At that moment she felt too heavy, broken, limp. Lifeless. She closed her eyes. He laid dormant for the whole two hours. No holoform. Nothing. It hurt.

* * *

From afar Sunstreaker observed as the humans ran this way and that to retrieve their own and collect the ones affected by what the Decepticon...no _they_ had done. Among the chaos he had glanced at Felicity every so often to make sure she was taken care of.

_"You are one of us..."_

The anger from those lingering smug words still stung him. The anger from Felicity misunderstanding his harsh commands for anger instead of fear burned. The anger of not protecting her home was worse.

Her only home.

Like an icy cooling way had the anger finally washed away leaving his mind exhausted and seeing clearer. He looked around once more and his spark ached. The devastation from just one fight set in.

He now fully focused his attention on Felicity sitting in the ambulance. Her blood pressure was being checked but she paid no mind. Instead her eyes were staring at the ground. As if feeling his stare she looked up slowly towards him.

Her face. Her _expression_. Her eyes held that of sadness, defeat, and worry. Her golden skin was pale and her medium length hair was dirty and frizzy. Her clothes were covered in dirt and ash from the dimming fire nearby.

Somewhere dried blood streaked across her pants.

And just as slowly she looked away blinking what were tears from her eyes and up to her apartment complex. This was her only home. A place where she felt safe. Her haven.

Sunstreaker's spark felt suffocated against the casing. This was just as bad as the bond withdrawals. He was so damned selfish. He should have done something to prevent this.

He gave a reluctant glance to the building now. Her apartment was on the west side affected most by the Plasma fired the Decepticon rattle doff to smite him. Plasma still glowed in the outer brick wall as firefight belted water onto it.

What he would do to have changed the outcome of their fight. What he would do to not be here. If he had not been here Felicity would still have a home.

He wanted to be back with his Autobot comrades. He wished he had never met Felicity. He wished he didn't cause... _this_. He wished everything to be undone.

* * *

Sunstreaker watched as the woman in front of him walked into her apartment. Each step was heavy and reluctant. He held his arm stiffly to his side as he stood in the hall glancing around at the destruction. His eyes set on her once again as she frantically looked around.

Everything was a color of black or charcoal gray. The furniture was torn and tattered burnt at the edges and soaked in murky water. Wooden chairs and tables that were against the walls for decoration were burnt and charred. The kitchen was beyond repair. The counter and appliances were but ashes and destroyed. He dared a look into her bedroom. That was where the worst of the damage was.

Her bed was dust along with all her dressers and knick knack on them. His eyebrows were creased in a grimace as he watched her helplessly look around her home. A shaky hand touched the door that hung on a hinge. It moaned once and fell onto the creaking floorboards. She stepped back startled by the loud noise among the silent destruction.

She turned out of her bedroom making a point to not look at him. Shame boiled within him. She made her way towards, what was once, the kitchen but paused when she heard crackling under her feet. She gasped startled again. She looked down, gingerly bent, and picked up the cracked and slightly burned photo that was frame by delicate metal trimmings.

As she stood tall once again, the trimmings fell off and delicately fell to the ground. She placed a hand on her mouth and then shook her head. He watched as the expression suddenly changed from grief to full panic. She placed the photo down quickly and ran off into the canvas room. Sunstreaker only spared a glace at the photograph before he ran after her.

There, he found Felicity gripping her hands against her chest. She looked around, grief and devastation wrinkling her face into something so painful. Sunstreaker dared to glance around also. Only then did the last lingering anger from the battle dissolved away. Only then did his expression turn from grief to shame. All around, her canvases were turned to dust. The once bright room was destroyed, leaving wallpaper curled and burnt. The once tan wooden floor was now covered in murky dampness and ash and water.

All her life's work. All of it was gone and destroyed. The dresser holding her paints and pallets were melted and deformed. Next to it was the pedestal holding her work that she would submit into the college of her dreams. Where she would become an artist and get money to finally support her and her parents. That was now all but burned and charred at the corners. She stumbled forward hand reaching out to shakily touch it. Her strangled exhales flaked the burned tips of the paper. Sunstreaker watched as they floated to the ground.

"You...you asked what I enjoyed the most…what I felt that day." She said her voice cracking and giving out. "It was the best feeling I ever had in...in so long..."

The mech glanced at the canvas again. Fearfully he walked forward. In the center of the painting were the two people sitting at a table at the café that she promised. Only now did he painfully realize the people looked so familiar.

She bowed her head, quickly bringing her hands to her face. He heard her take a sharp inhale through her fingers. He was quick to catch her as she fell to her knees in grief.

Without hesitation, he wrapped his one good arm around her, brought her close to his body, and cradled the back of her head. Gently, he pressed her against his chest. He held on tightly as she released a long cry of pained grief. "I am so sorry Felicity." Sunstreaker murmured into her hair.

How stupid did he sound? Words would not fix what had been done. How pathetic. Again the guilt from before only reminded him of his selfishness. He was the cause of this. He could have prevented this. He could have taken his destruction away from her, her home. He shouldn't have told her to run away. _He_ should have ran away. He closed his eyes tightly, gritting his teeth. If he had never met her, her life's work wouldn't have been turn to dust. A stupid pathetic sorry didn't do his sins justice.

She gripped his shirt and shoulder tightly, allowing her sobs shake her whole body. Just like she did with him, he held her tightly. He allowed her to grieve freely.

" _I'm sorry_ …" He gritted out again. He was angry at himself. He didn't want this pain to come onto her. He didn't want any of this. Why did it have to be this way? Why was his life filled with disaster? He would never place his fate upon anyone else.

He heard Felicity try and say his name but he shook his head against her own, brushing his chin against her dirty and matted hair. For once the thought of her human grime didn't cross his mind. He himself could push aside that stupid pride. She wailed a single word.

Sunstreaker gritted his teeth as he felt his spark writhe at the sound of her devastated and pained voice. Her home, her memories, her life was now all but turned ashes.

Why, indeed.

* * *

There wasn't much to salvage besides a few photos and clothes that were protected in her closet. Sunstreaker watched and remained by her side as she weakly gathered the remains of her home and life into a garbage bag. She was so withered, so broken.

They were there for an hour scavenging anything else. Felicity shook her head. "I'm done. We're done. Let's go." She quickly lifted the garbage bag and hurriedly walked out of the apartment. Sunstreaker was left behind glancing at her for a long while before back at the doorway. He shifted his grip on his broken arm and turned to walk away.

A sudden slap was heard from behind him. On instinct the mech spun around tense and alert. He realized there was nothing there but floating pages in the air. From one of the book shelves a pad of some sort fell to the ground. It was already soaking the water up from the ground. He released his arm and hurriedly went onto one knee and picked it up. His limp hand brushed along the ground as he delicately wiped the water off of the thick paper. With delicate motions he gathered the loose pages and placed them on his knee.

The holoform flipped through the all familiar pages and stopped at a sketch of Felicity sitting across from him that day at the café. Some sort of relief came over him seeing the sketches were not only in perfect condition but the fire only licked at the edges of the pages.

Steadily, as if the sketch book was made of glass, he placed the loose pages inside and closed it, not daring to press harder on the damp pages.

He stood and walked out of the apartment not bearing another moment there as well. All was not lost. It still didn't make him feel any better.


	8. Talking

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Eight Talking**

* * *

Where would they go? They were both lost. Homeless. Felicity kept her eyes away from the windows, away from the street lamps that came and went. Instead she kept her head bowed and eyes focused on the floor before her. She was numb to the outside world as it continued on and as they continued as well.

They continued even though it was aimless. There was no destination now. For the both of them. They only stopped to rest here and there. A parking lot. The side of the road. It was rest by night and driving by day.

Was this what Sunstreaker did before he had found her?

Was this what it felt like to have no home?

She didn't ask him. They rarely spoke. If they did it was small talk. Very small talk. It was becoming painful. In some ways and some manners she tried to forget Sunstreaker was there, to make it more bearable. His holoform wasn't activated. These past days were made harder because of that fact.

Felicity wrapped her leather jacket around her shoulders a little bit tighter. She shuffled the collar up higher to hide her lips. It was the tenth time she tried to fight back tears. She didn't want to cry in front of him. She didn't want to feel so weak in front of a mech that harbored so much strength and dangerous intent.

She was selfish to think of him in such a manner. Was he not the one that caught her and held her as she yelled out in pain? No one had ever held her like that before. She wished he would do it again. She wished she could cry again. Freely.

She knew Sunstreaker had good intentions. Oh, did she know he was only trying to protect her. She knew he bared the weight of her home being destroyed. She knew he wanted to leave but was now bound by her. She knew that he didn't want to leave her behind homeless and destroyed.

She hoped at least.

Felicity hoped he was here because he wanted to be.

A choked sob managed to escape her trembling lips. A hand covered her mouth. She looked away to the door handle. Anything besides the windows. Away from the driver's side of the vehicle. "Sorry." She whispered between fingers.

He didn't reply and she hated it. The silence was beginning to suffocate her. Should could only take so much.

She wanted him to rumble those same words said to her in her canvas room. Being held by him was something she had never felt before. Someone so strong and powerful. Graceful and wonderful as...no. No. She couldn't get that deep.

She just wanted him to say everything would be alright, that he was fine, that he didn't want to leave her behind so hurriedly, that he didn't mind taking care of her until things were worked out. Until she could figure out what the next step was.

Just...another apology for her home being gone even though she knew it wasn't his fault.

She clenched her jaw and eyes shut.

Her breath caught when she felt him slow down and then stop all together. She looked up and dared a glance out the window. Another parking lot. It was away from street lamps that highlight his dark interior. With the dark, it was now truly silent as soon as he cut his rumbling engine. She remained so frozen not daring to move. Her quivering chest and heart felt strangled.

"Felicity."

His hoarse voice saying her name sounded too good at that moment. Her heart skipped a beat. Her name being said like that...

" _Felicity_."

She closed her eyes and tried to hold back the sobs ready to escape. "Yes?" Her voice cracked.

"Please..." He begged.

He only begged her once and that was when she needed her to run to safety. Because he cared. She knew he did. She hoped he did. Because she cared for him too…

Carefully she finally revealed herself and shook her head. She wouldn't cry again. She already did. She already thought her feelings were said and done but they weren't. The woman let in a shaky breath and closed her eyes. Next to her she felt the air crackle as his holoform came to life. His presence was gentle.

She felt the static crawl across her dirty skin as he reached over to her arm. Then woman craved his touch but didn't dare to let her want show. She was being weak and that was something she could not be. Not until she was given permission to be so.

She was homeless again. It would be so hard to start again.

He gripped her wrist tightly. She looked up to him opening her bloodshot and tired eyes. She saw him crease his eyebrows at her withered face.

Not again...

"Sun..." She whispered staring ahead. Her words were choking her throat, causing it to close. The air became too thick. "I don't want to keep you down. I don't want to keep you away from the Autobots but, but I need you right now, I need you." She shivered, her body betraying her will.

She closed her eyes, sobs coming from quivering lips and clogged words. "Please don't leave. I'm so alone. I don't know what to do. I just need you to stay...I can't do this again...not again. I did this once. _Oh God_ …." Her inhales were choked and broken as the words came out. She went to cover her face and sob her little heart out but wasn't allowed. But not like she thought.

Instead he had reached out and brought her close. Her face was gently pressed into his chest. It felt good. He felt so strong.

"Felicity, don't let me go. You hear me? Don't you let me go and I won't let you go."

Those words. The all too familiar promise she had told him. She clenched her eyes shut and bowed her head, pressing her sobs into his chest. The little human lost so much, she didn't want to lose him either.

"I' m sorry." She said.

"Don't." Was the harsh order. "This is all my fault. Please don't say that." His voice vibrated within his chest.

* * *

They had been driving around the city for more than a few days now. Days that felt like forever. He drove by day and rested by night. But that barely helped his frame heal. His energon levels were lowering and so was his energy. He had to keep driving in case of any remaining Decepticons in the area. _Damned if you do damned if you don't._

A Decepticon's threat was not something to be taken seriously although not to be ignored...

Within those days were words sparingly said. Guilt was heavy in his spark. He felt if anymore was said he would do more harm than good. So the only time he spoke was for anything she needed physically. He only spoke when he found a food mart or a coffee shop for her to eat and go to the bathroom in. The only shower she took was one at a local gym before they kicked her out because of the lack of membership. Humans were disgusting to those that were in need.

Wasn't he in the same position so long ago? Where he lost everything?

So why did he remain silent when she so obviously needed him?

Felicity was lost, and so unlike him, she had someone to turn to.

At that moment the woman in his passenger seat shuffled her jacket around her tighter. She wasn't good at hiding when he was so observant of her. A timid apology was said. Stupid human...it was he who was at fault. It was he who crumbled her world. He couldn't take this silence anymore. It choked him. That or the guilt did.

He slowed and pulled into a parking lot. He had enough. He was gentle. "Felicity." He called.

She was hiding her tears under her jacket. Her little heart was pumping so fast and it worried the mech.

"Felicity." He said again so desperate to let her know that he was here for her unlike him so long ago. He was alone. He didn't want that to happen to her. To anyone. Loneliness was just as painful as what caused it.

Finally she answered him and it never sounded so relieving. He activated his holoform knowing she would respond better to something more human. As his holoform materialized he tried to come up with the right words. He wanted to allow her her grieving. He wanted her to feel comfortable with him. But those words never came.

There really wasn't a need for a speech or comforting words. Instead he simply begged. "Please…" His voice just as tight as the grip on her wrist. He wanted her to stay anchored. As much as it would help her, it secured him as well.

That one word was good enough. It was all that was needed for her to look up to him. Only did he see now, in the darkness and dim lighting from his dash, how worn and exhausted she was.

Her expression told all. She had given up. He sagged his shoulders and creased his eyebrow in pain. _Please don't give up..._

She had seen his reaction and in turn she broke. Her words were babbled and a mess as she went on and on. She didn't want to be a burden. She didn't want him to leave her.

The Autobots were in the back of his mind. They weren't on his mind for the past days, instead his sole focus was on the human he protected.

Primus, forget finding the Autobots for now. His human was in pain.

He shook his head wanting her to just stop. To calm herself. All that she said was false. Her mind weighed so much more heavy than his and he didn't know how to fix it. So in a rushed attempt to calm her, he wrapped his hand behind her head and brought her to his body. He held her tight once again shaking his head.

"Felicity, don't let me go. You hear me? Don't you let me go and I won't let you go." The words were strict. He brought his mouth to her ear and whispered the words. "Don't let me go." Over and over again. Just as he did when Sideswipe was slipping away in his hands. Just as Felicity had said when she first witness his withdrawals.

"I'm sorry."

Anger flared but he stamped it down. Stupid human...It was his fault that her life was torn apart. It was his fault that she was broken. He had to fix her. His voice was a curt order. "Don't. This is all my fault. Please don't say that."

She brought her hand to his shoulder and he pinned it his neck and shoulder. "I am going to fix all of this I promise, Felicity."

"How...?" Her broken voice asked.

He didn't know. But...he had to. No matter what it took.

* * *

After that night they had reached an understanding with each other. The silent pact was made. They would not leave each other and they would stay together.

Sunstreaker held her until she cried the last of her tears and slipped into an exhausted sleep.

He broke away and stayed and watched her until the sun rose. He didn't sleep yet again. Exhaustion bit at him but he had gone for longer without recharge.

The front lines conditioned him enough.

Despite how they aimlessly drove from one parking lot to another each night. How she barely lived on toast from coffee shops and vending machine food. And how she felt grimy and disgusting after her short lived shower at another gym. They would remain together. Sunstreaker would not abandon her like that. He felt the pain of long ago resurface and he forced himself to forget. How he saw himself in Felicity.

It was just another night when he pulled into another vacant parking lot next to a run down gas station.

It was away from human eyes and traffic. Not enough to transform unfortunately. Above the street light flickered and buzzed to life. Sunstreaker cut his engine and felt the ache of his axials from the lack of transforming and stretching out in his bipedal form.

Felicity opened the passenger door and stood outside stretching. He wished he could have that luxury at the moment. She took in a couple of breaths of air and stood hugging her arms. Oddly tonight felt different. He watched her look around, flipping her hair back and into a short spiky poney tail.

She considered the gas station for a moment before looking down in her pocket. "I only have a few bucks left…" She murmured.

It was a signal for him to activate his holoform. It appeared standing next to her leaning on the side of his form where the yellow plating was still dull and black from the plasma round he took. "What about what you humans call banks? Any credits there?" His voice was a murmur.

She turned around and shook her head, she didn't make eye contact though. "Money? Not much. It all goes to rent. I can't afford to take any out." She considered something for a moment. "I guess that doesn't matter now." She added quietly.

Sunstreaker nodded once. "Then what about your job? You said you only work on the weekends? How does that support you then?" He said raising a brow.

The nighttime was cooler and fresher as the wind blew past them. Felicity looked down to the ground and smiled sadly. Still no eye contact. "I never told you what that job was, huh?"

"Nothing you tell me will make me think differently of you." He urged.

She looked up, heaviness in her eyes. "A pleasure dancer. A stripper."

Sunstreaker became stiff. They too had what they called pleasure bots on Cybertron. They were a common service not spoken about. They were always there just never spoken of. Kaon was filled with them. Many femmes didn't appear back in the morning. Many were taken and never seen again. It was a terrible job. He felt pity for her.

She spotted his disgust and he quickly wiped it away. "On Cybertron we had the same. Except it was harsher business." He paused crossing his arms. He held back the bristly tone that was ready to come from his voice. "Did anyone tried to do anything…?" The tone was one rough because he couldn't bear thinking of anyone touching her in that manner.

Felicity smiled sadly. "Oh yeah some close calls but I had a friend there. He would escort me out to the bus stop and make sure I was alright…" She exhaled, her breath fogging the air. "It's not a bad job. People get the misconceptions that you're a whore or slut if you're a stripper. I was just trying to make ends meet. I was going to quit last week but it looks like they forgot about me instead. I can't complaint though."

Sunstreaker's protectiveness over her vanished. It was good that she was out of that business. It seemed like the concept of pleasure dancers were different on Cybertron. He withheld the other part that Cybertronian pleasure bots were meant for interfacing and teasing, here they were meant for just a show. He still didn't like the concept of either one even if there was a shameful time he was serviced by them...He stamped the memories down.

"You say making ends meet. You struggled?" He asked uncrossing his arms. He could admit he looked a little intimidating with that strict and judgmental stance. He relaxed more setting his hands in his pockets. It was more casual and Felicity's response was also relaxed. Now was a time to know the human more. He wasn't going to blow it. He wanted to know this human more. He had told her some of his past and now he wished to know hers.

"Stripping is good money. I paid rent pretty well but I only could afford Ramen for meals. If I had enough I would buy fruit, and boy was that living the life…but yeah. That's how dirt poor I am."

She hugged her arms tighter around himself. She bowed her head. "My parents...my parents." Her eyes shifted. She was hiding something. "They are on the other side of the country, while I am here busting my safety and ass for a meal and a broken dream." She paused licking her lips.

"What happened?" He gently urged.

She smiled. A humorless laugh. Felicity placed her hands on her face and scrubbed them down. "They gave up on life. They just gave up and turned to the state for money and now they forget what hard work and determination are. They needed the help and they take it for granted now. Dad liked beer and mom liked the drugs…." She paused her voice becoming tighter. "Maybe they still do..."

She leaned against the hood of his form and he relaxed upon the contact. She looked to him. "I'm going to save them and show them to never give up on life. That it's always worth fighting for... I need that college so my art can get me money. Dancing or painting. The only two things I am good at and one can get me money, safely."

Sunstreaker watched and listened to her intently. Felicity nodded her head as if she was reassuring herself more than him. She fiddled with her hands digging her nails under the others. She was nervous revealing her inmost self, so parallel to when they first met. Why shut herself away now? What she ashamed?

Another breeze blew past them and Sunny watched as her slightly dirty hair came undone from her pony tail. It moved across her tanned skin. For a human, an organic, she was a beautiful figure. In a professional way Sunstreaker saw her as a very pristine and gorgeous human. What humans called beauty was odd...there was only one definition of it. One strict view of it and everyone else that was different was not. Before him was true beauty. She was…husky for a woman but that's what made her unique. She was proud of herself.

Confidence was always Sunstreaker's motto.

He realized an unintentional and poorly timed smile was on his face as he stared at her.

Her sad eyes were still on the ground but she looked up expecting some sort of reply from him from her speech.

He nodded just once. He wasn't always good with words. Actions were better unspoken things. "It's late."

She seemed disappointed that he had nothing to say. "I'm not tired…"

Sunstreaker sat up from leaning against his form. He walked over to her and placed his hands on her shoulders. She was shorter than him. Enough for him to look down at her. "You're tired. I know you are. Your body is taking its toll. Sleep."

She gazed up into his inhuman blue eyes. A small smile came to her lips. That stupid smile. He felt a flood of relief come over her seeing that Primus damn smile. He returned the gesture but it was only minute. Only Felicity's careful eyes would have caught the tiny curl of the corner of his mouth. "Sunny…"

He didn't exactly know why she said his name. But it felt good to him. Only Sideswipe was the exception to the annoying nickname. When she said it, it brought a wave of calm over his spark.

She moved closer to him and hugged him around his midsection resting her head on his chest. Sunstreaker placed his arms to the side in shock, not expecting the show of affection. He swallowed and cringed. "Ah, alright…yeah." He patted her lightly on the back awkwardly.

"Thank you."

Sunstreaker sagged and relaxed upon her truly grateful tone. He sighed. "We'll make it through this. I promise."

* * *

Footsteps echoed down one of the many halls of Diego Garcia's base. In his hand, Colonel William Lennox held a debriefing of a recovery mission in San Francisco. A Decepticon had been left in the middle of a populated district. He flipped through the pages again. An offline Decepticon.

What made the recovery so different from others is that none of Optimus's bots had been dispatched to intercept the nameless Decepticon scout. As a matter of fact, it was unknown that there was any Decepticon activity in that area.

Lennox came to a heavy metal door and punched in a code. The pad turned from red to green to indicate his clearance. The heavy metal door opened with a groan and the man made his way into the large hanger. He held the clipboard to his side and nodded to other soldiers coming back from a mission on the east coast. A warm breeze came off of the ocean and into the hanger. Loud footfalls and hydraulics echoed into the hanger as Optimus Prime and, not too far behind, Ironhide came walking off of the tarmac.

Lennox made his way to the catwalk in the middle of the room and climbed up the stairs hastily. "Prime." He called.

The leader immediately zeroed in on the man as he walked across the metal. He smiled politely to the mech and nodded his head once. "I hate to bombard you coming back from a mission but I thought you might want to hear about this as soon as possible." The human said indicating the clipboard

Optimus gave Ironhide a curious look to which he returned with a nod. Being his right hand mech, what Optimus heard, he heard also.

"Go ahead, colonel." He said.

Lennox was now face to face with the Prime. He became comfortable on his feet and took in a deep breath. "A few days ago one of the recovery units in San Francisco were called in to clean up an offline Decepticon scout. He was left in the middle of a populated area. Until the local authorities arrived that's when we were alerted. His designation is unknown."

"We've had no 'bots in that sector." Ironhide pointed out.

"Exactly. That's why I wanted to bring this to you. The mech was left in a populated area. We have eyewitness reports but all of them are different and lead to no direct lead. All we know is that there's another Cybertronian in that area.

Optimus remained silent before drawing his attention to the human. "Were there any human casualties?"

Lennox turned a page on the clipboard. "Nine, from a nearby apartment complex that got caught in the crossfire. They found all the other bodies but one woman is missing." He said quietly.

Optimus's systems groaned as he shifted his footing. The grave news of innocent humans being caught in the crossfire made his spark ache. "It is optimal that we investigate this immediately. If there is a stranded Autobot or rogue Decepticon in this area we must make sure that they do not cause any more damage or attention to our cause."

Lennox nodded his head. "Send Bumblebee to scout the area, Prime?" He suggested.

Ironhide hummed. "The Decepticons have been quiet lately should we both go with Bumblebee? Who knows what sort of operations they've held up there."  
"The Decepticon body was transported to a nearby military base. N.E.S.T officials have been sent there already. You can hide there if things become…too hot." He said searching for the appropriate term.

The black mech seemed to be content with the additional news. "So, no need for scouting."

"I'm hearing this for the first time too, 'hide." Lennox said with a shrug. "We did detect an incoming Autobot earlier this year if you remember. We lost it afterward so we discarded it as a false beacon. Connecting the dots I guessed it's the Autobot we've been searching for."

"And he is already slaggin 'cons." Ironhide added with a snort of laughter.

Optimus didn't acknowledge his weapons specialist's comment. "We will leave as soon as we can, colonel Lennox."

The man nodded his head. "I'll assemble a team as soon as I can."


	9. Eraser

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really really like how the rewrite came to be in this chapter. It ended up being super super long but I think length at this point doesn't matter. Sunny and Felicity have a way of being dramatic in their own cute and strange ways and they just took the wheel in a lot of these scenes. Originally I thought this whole chapter was so mary sue for sunny to (SPOLIERS) altogether fix her life just like that but in the end I basically said "f' it and went with it because reasons.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers** ****

* * *

**Chapter Nine Eraser**

* * *

The same routine of driving by day and resting at night was wearing on the both of them. Both were losing hope and losing confidence. Cruising on the highway now seemed to pass the time like nothing. Radio softly played in the background for Felicity's sake. She hadn't had much sleep the past days and, even if he wouldn't admit it out loud, it worried him. So right now, he remained as quite as possible to allow her rest. Even if it wasn't good or deep, something was better than nothing.

Gentle late night music strummed through the radio even causing him drift into recharge, but he couldn't let that happen. He wanted to stay active and keep driving. He couldn't stop, that would just make him feel more useless.

Felicity moaned in her sleep and clutched the counsel between the seats. He cringed as her nails dug into the leather. He sighed with relief when she let go. Sunstreaker exchanged glances between her and the road.

The human mumbled something and then opened her eyes as if something startled her. Sunstreaker didn't acknowledge her immediately, too curious watching what she would do. She glanced around the cabin and sighed in relief. She brushed her messy hair back. Felicity then became comfortable once again and nuzzled her cheek into the seat and closed her eyes again. It was assuring to the mech.

What was just a sigh to him was the reassurance that he needed. She still found comfort with him. _Him._ The thought didn't make sense at first and Sunstreaker struggled to wonder why. She had seen how he fought, had seen the terrible side of him, had known what he was as a fearsome soldier so why _him_? But then again, with all the slag they have been through it was expected she would have grown to trust him. Did they just know too much about each other? Did he let down his barriers that much to her?

Sunstreaker vented harshly. He would never had admit that she would have gone so close to his spark. Yet now...

His engine rumbled as he downshifted.

...It was different.

The mech didn't like the highway so much anymore and looped around an exit ramp. His engine slowed to a whisper but then a guttural growl as he kicked up his speed again. San Francisco was calm as a city could ever get. It was a calm that Sunstreaker preferred over other cities he has heard about on this planet.

None would ever outsize Cybertron's dazzling and breathtaking cityscapes.

Because of his low undercarriage, a few cracks and bumps in the road jostled Felicity more than it should have. He gave her a minute, nervous, glance before returning his attention to the road.

The mech only realized he was driving slower than normal when a couple of cars in the opposite lane passed by lazily. Huh. Tonight was different once again. Finally giving in to his apparent exhaustion, Sunstreaker found a partially empty parking lot and pulled into a spot. He cut his engine and his holoform appeared in the driver's seat with his arms crossed over his chest.

A strained and bothered look was permanently on his face. He gave a side glance to Felicity but then looked straight ahead. It was frustrating that he had to fight himself to just simply look away from her. He set his jaw but then sighed looking to her again. His expression melted away to a more relaxed state as he watched her breathe gently. His eyes trailed over her body. He watched as her chest slowly rose and fell. He noticed her dirty, clumped hair fall to the sides of her face as she breathed and shifted. Her hand was hanging over the side of seat. Her hands were cracked and scarred. The hands of an artist, stained with acrylic and dry from constantly washing hands. Her clothes were becoming dirty and so was she, but that never occurred to Sunstreaker. Even her human filth wasn't getting under his plating like he thought it would.

He was hers to protect. No matter what.

A slow sigh escaped him as his stare fell on her hand. Curiously, he reached forward but pulled back, hesitant. No. He placed his hand on his thigh and looked away from her.

Guilt.

It was guilt that stopped him from touching her yet again.

It was now a week after the destruction of her home and he still felt the same guilt. It wouldn't go away and never would he allow it to. Because in the end, even if she had assured him, this was his fault. He vowed he was going to get through this with her. But for how long? How long would they drive around? Would she just crumble right before him as he did nothing?

The question of 'what now' wasn't even asked. Sunstreaker silently berated himself. Because the answer was too obvious. Felicity was a poor woman, the lower class. He knew that all too well.

Being an artist was not a sure way ticket to riches and money. If it was anything like on Cybertron, rarely would artistry get a mech or femme somewhere. Unless you had connections. Very good ones.

And that is not what Felicity had.

Sunstreaker realized that the guilt he felt was not because of the destruction. But because, even when he promised her, he did not _know how_ to fix this. He couldn't bear the pain of seeing her like this anymore. She was homeless because of him.

Something had to give and he had to do something.

Sunstreaker placed his hands on his face and scrubbed them downward in exasperation. His intentions were in the right place. Just trying to execute the solution was all it took.

With a quiet groan he looked out of the dark glass and stared ahead of himself. His glance landed on a large advertisement, a billboard. He didn't take the information in at first. It was a credit card advertisement. Nothing much to be interested in but he was.

Never pay with money. No interest for the first twelve months. Zero percent APR for the first two. The frag was this?

Was it another currency the humans used? Wasn't this another for of credits? It was something to keep his mind active so he looked up what this piece of plastic did on the internet. Apparently it did a lot. It built credit and allowed for easier transactions. The security of fraud would always be covered as opposed to handling cash. It seemed the world was open to endless possibilities with this plastic. Rewards were even given depending on your lifestyle. Humans were so creative, even if they were so simple minded.

It was an interesting find. Sometime to pass about five minute of his life. He bitterly congratulated himself. But before he could close out of his search he paused.

Credits.

That's what made the world go round at the end of the cycle wasn't it? And having this piece of plastic, a credit card, seemed to make life easier.

Credits.

He looked down to Felicity.  
It was exactly what she needed. His mind raced as his holoform dissolved.

He knew what he had to do. He was an advanced robotic species. Hacking into the internet was pulling a curtain away. Hacking into the credit card companies and banks nearby was but tumbling over a brick wall with but his finger.

As said before humans were simple minded and primitive. Creating an existing account in Felicity's name was too easy. Changing and tweaking payments to make it seem she had this piece of plastic for years was simple. Collecting loose money in their economy and filtering it into her name was but changing a few lines of codes.

It only took him a half hour. It only took so long to assure that he left no trail behind, he crossed his t's and dotted his I's as he heard Felicity say once before.

He reactivated his holoform this time holding out his hand. Within it the rectangular piece of plastic was formed. He stared at it as he forged Felicity's name. With a final stroke of their human cursive the card materialized.

She had plenty now. Endless possibilities because of the amount she now had, always had, if he were to roll along with his hacking.

He wanted to set things right again. This was but a start. He knew that mere money or possessions wouldn't erase the guilt and damage he had done. He knew all too well. The twin just wanted to make sure Felicity was in good hands when he was gone. Sunstreaker closed his hand into a fist and the credit card fizzled out.

The thought of leaving her hurt his spark. But it was inevitable. Because of tonight his spark and mind could be at ease.

He knew she would be alright.

* * *

It was around five in the morning when the mech had woken out of a not so restful recharge. His wounds were taking longer to heal because of this.

He groggily checked in with his internal chronometer out of habit but was rudely reminded that they were out of commission yet again. Old habits died hard. He vented an irritated sigh and started his engine quietly also reminding himself of his human passenger. Today he didn't mind if she slept in. She deserved and needed it.

Sunstreaker took his time groggily pulling out of the parking lot and onto the main road. This morning was very busy. It was the start of a new work week. Cars passed by busily and others drove too close to his bumper for comfort.

He was irritated at the human's ignorance for road space. This was a main artery leading to the highway so it was bound to be so clogged. So much for being a peaceful morning.

He turned off of the road and was relieved by the new found space he had. Irritation was forgotten as he rode down a steep hill leading to the coastline. The red, orange, and pink hues of the sunrise glistened off of the water. Sunstreaker marveled at the view, driving slower to appreciate it.

He came to a stoplight and waited patiently for other humans to drive by and cross the road. He watched a couple cross the street in a flurry. From their fancy suit and dress they were on their way to their jobs.

He turned his attention back onto the bay below. It was a lovely view. It was peaceful and the salty breeze that blew by felt just as good. Unnoticed the light turned green. A car behind him honked their horn startling him out of his relaxed moment. Immediately he thought about the sound waking Felicity up and then the anger came from their rude action.

"Stupid humans." He muttered before he pulled ahead and continued his trek down the hill, the view disappearing behind shadows of half built buildings. When a car on his side of the road was at a complete stop did he realize that this construct was the cause of the delay. No wonder why it was so busy on the other road.

It was so damn early too. Why did humans get up so early? Were their lives that rushed and dismal?

It was moments later that the cause of the traffic jam was a pipe being set in the road ahead. Apparently new condos were being built right on the hill. He tried to get a better look and saw that the finished condos on the higher hill had a great view of the ocean and the bay he was admiring just before.

The traffic came to another stop. But that was alright.

This gave him a moment to see a sign held down by sand bags and planks of wood displaying what was being constructed. Condos. And it seemed like they were already renting out.

If Sunstreaker went as far as creating a fake credit identify for the human he so cared for, might as well go farther.

Hell, he was pretty sure even the great and mighty Optimus Prime would be disappointing with his cheating ways of securing a life for Felicity but in the end he would declare he had good intentions.

Sunstreaker always had good intentions it was just his past and his ways always got in the way. No one ever bothered to look past it all. Except Felicity.

As before Sunstreaker broke his way through the computer system. There were a hand full of condos to choose from, describing the beautiful view of the bay below and the sunrise. There was one in particular that stood out. It was single person unit that held the highest view of the bay. It was right at the peak of the hill.

And with just a smooth ease as before, he sent in a request, filling everything out that was Felicity's identity. The credit he had crated only last night was exceptional and fit the criteria they held.

It was high but she would mange as long as he kept an eye on the fake account. The request was approved on the spot via Sunstreaker reality and the first month of rent was paid as per their agreement. This was too easy.

He could have made Felicity into a rock star, gave her a mansion, given her riches and anything she wanted because of him. He would have done so in a sparkbeat. Given he anything she needed.

He would have done anything to help sooth what her past was and paved way for something new.

No one would have done that for him but by Primus...he would. For her. Sunstreaker carefully backed out of the site and closed all doors and tied loose ends. That condo was hers now. He gave her a life and a home. All that he needed to do was secure it.

He backed out of the site just in time as the traffic started to move again. He would erase everything he had done.

* * *

"Felicity wake up. I don't have all day." There was the sound of impatient clapping.

Felicity gasped opening her eyes and darting into a sitting position. "What-? The hell, Sunny?" She placed a forearm to her eyes in exasperation. What could possibly be so important to urge her out of a sleep. It wasn't like they had anywhere important to be... She removed her forearm from her eyes and slapped a hand to her face and scrubbed it down.

She looked over at his holoform and noticed he was...perkier than normal. Her suspicious grew. "What's the rush?" She mumbled. She tried to make her hair look somewhat presentable but it didn't do any good. Sunstreaker took pity and started to flatten her hair out. Felicity smiled, it was halfhearted. She slapped his hand away with a breathy laugh.

"Get out." He said with a tiny curl to his lips. "We have a lot to do today." Smoothly he did as he had told her and stood with a hand in his pocket.

Felicity looked out of the window and balked seeing a full parking lot around them and just after that a mall in front of them. "Sun-what? What are we doing here? H-hey! I can't go out in public looking like this!" She yelled as Sunstreaker opened the door for her.

"You'll be fine. Trust me." He was impatient, she saw this, he was just hiding it behind that smile of his. She bit her lower lip and finally stood flattening her shirt out and her jeans. Did she look alright? Did she smell? It had been a few days… Lost in her self conscience thoughts she didn't realize Sunstreaker had been walking already. She jumped into action catching up with his easy stride.

"Sunny..." She began flowing him towards the mall entrance. "Do I…?" She couldn't bear finishing the sentence.

"No." He thankfully supplied with a tilt of his head. "You could brush your denta though."

She bristled. "Sunstreaker this isn't funny. What the hell are you up to?!" How dare he make such a joke, especially during a time that was so sensitive. A mall? Right. Were they going to go on a shopping spree?

They walked into one of the entrances and stopped just so in front of all the stores. Sunstreaker looped his arm around her and brought her in close. She looked at him from the corner of her vision. "Alright, go in there first."

She followed his gaze. "A salon..." She deadpanned.

"Go. I already made an appointment. It's all paid. Meet me at…" He looked away from the salon and halfheartedly looked around for a moment before pointing to a clothing store. "That store over there. I'll get a head start."

He lifted his arm from around her and began his easy stride. She caught his hand and tugged him back.

"Wait! Sunny!"

He spun around, a smirk on his face.

She paused never seeing a smirk like that before. It was mischievous and something that she somewhat worried about. It was a smirk that told he knew something she didn't And she didn't like that.

"What are you doing?" She asked, her eyebrows knit in worry. " _Why_ are you doing this?" She nodded, indicating the mall itself. People passing by gave them curious looks. A man dressed in designer clothing arguing with a raggy women did set first impressions oddly.

Sunstreaker fully turned towards her, his body holding some sort of power she hadn't seen before. He was holding back one of his explosions that she thought were a sort of tantrum. But that tantrum never came. It dissipated into a long and heavy exhale. Never letting go of her hand, he straightened out his collar and looked around for a moment. His gaze turned distant before sharpening again. He looked to her with those unnatural blues. "I need you to just trust me. I'll set things right again." He released her hand giving it one last gentle tug.

With that he walked away and she did not follow after. She lifted her hand looking to it. That little tug... It was something so small but to her it was the largest gesture he could ever give to her.

It was assuring. It was something she could hold onto. She looked up to him easily moving to one of the front displays of clothing.

She turned toward the salon and looked at the receptionist who was chewing gum and very obviously watching what had just occurred. "You must be the ten o clock." She drawled, popping her gum.

Felicity nodded her head numbly. "Guess, I am?"

* * *

Never would she have had admitted it out loud or to Sunstreaker but the hair cut, facial, manicure _and_ pedicure were very much needed. Hell she couldn't remember the last time she had gotten a pedicure. IT was probably for prom night with her best friend.

She waved a little hesitant goodbye to the laid back receptionist who had talked her ear off about men and whatnot while her hair was trimmed.

Felicity turned toward the store where she had last seen Sunstreaker and walked. She was very much still confused about what he had planed for her but as he had begged before, she would let him do what he felt needed to be done.

With a little sigh and parting her freshly washed hair she moved into the store. The sound of an electric bell rang as she did so. As she moved about the clothes in this store weren't designer or low name brands. The prices weren't bad but still high. Of course in San Francisco the name brands were always expensive. What Sunstreaker wanted to do with her was out of her scope.

As if the fates were listening Sunstreaker seemingly popped out of nowhere with an armful of clothing. Felicity saw that excited smirk on his face. "That took a while. I had to have her help me find some stuff for you. What about this blouse? Any other fabrics besides acrylic?" Who was he talking to? Oh. Felicity then noticed a blushing woman next to him. Felicity sagged her shoulders. Did Sunstreaker used his charm on her?

"I can look in back for you, sir."

He turned and gave a dashing smile to her. "That would be amazing."

She smiled in return and hurried away.

He watched for a moment before the smile faded. "You look a lot better." His voice was genuine now. No longer the fab tone he had taken on.

She turned to him and she found herself blushing a bit. "It felt very nice...yes, thank you."

He nodded satisfied with her answer. "Now then..." Sunstreaker shifted all the bright and colorful clothing onto one arm and then gripped Felicity by hers. He gently escorted her to the dressing room that was to the side of the store. Two and two slowly added up. "Sunny, are those for me?"

Before she could fight or realize it, he had practically shoved her into a stall against her will.

Felicity banged on the door. "Wait Sunny what the hell!?" He shoved her into a stall against her will and leaned against it until the woman stopped beating against the door.

Unknowing to the woman he oh, so casually he flicked thought he articles of clothing. His voice matched his demeanor. "So, I figured bright flowing clothing would look best on your form." He said as she continued to struggled. She was fiddling with the lock when a top of sorts was placed over the door. She stared at it as she realized what he was doing. "Are we really doing this!?"

The question was ignored. The human turned toward the direction of his voice and hissed continuing to beat the door. "This cut will compliment your size…."

She stopped beating against the door expression now low to the ground. Those words...She noted how Sunstreaker backed away testing if she was done with her outburst.

Despite everything that was happening she remained focused on those _certain_ words. She took the shirts off of the door and felt the fabric. Tested how they felt on her hands. Slowly. Felicity came out of the stall. He anger was traded for hurt as she clutched the shirts to her chest. Did he mean well? Was he unaware of…? "Is that a fat joke?" She said in a tiny broken voice. She was sensitive about her size. She was...heftier than some. It was a lifelong struggle she held about herself. A heavy burden that always was in the back of her mind.

She watched as his smile went away upon her hurt tone. He tilted his head considering her for a moment. "No," He began, "your size is perfect, Felicity." He leaned forward and hung the remainder of the clothing on a hook inside the stall. The holoform glanced at her one last time before walking away to get more.

Felicity opened her mouth to reply but once again words fell on her and all she could do was remain silent. She watched as the woman came back with a top he had requested. That smile. She knew it was no smile. Fake as fake, it returned to woo the woman into the whims he needed to collect for her.

Slowly, she closed the stall door and looked at the tops, bottoms, skirts, and tank tops hanging around her.

Perfect?

Her? _Perfect?_

With a single finger she went through them slowly. No one had ever called her that before...

She looked toward the mirror and flicked her eyes over her tattered and torn self. Was he planning on helping her out of what had happened to her?

No, that went way too deep. This was maybe to lift her up. Help her elevate her spirits because that's what femmes of her race did when they were depressed. They went shopping.

Yeah. Otherwise he wouldn't have called her perfect. That was just an empty compliment...right? So why was her heart within her throat? Why was her stomach so heavy and light at the same time?

No. This was nothing. Just a compliment. Just a compliment that's all it was.

Sunstreaker seemed very in tune with what her body could pull off. He researched and in the end found out woman liked compliments. He looked at her closet one day while she wasn't looking. Whatever Sunstreaker had planned- She closed her eyes holding her head. She had to stop thinking. There was no deeper mean there was no end to all these thoughts. It was circling over and over again. She opened her eyes and sighed. She restarted her thoughts. Whatever…Sunstreaker had planned...she supposed she would go along with it.

Another calming sigh.

Taking off her shirt that hadn't been washed in some time, she tried on the tank tops and sweaters and other articles of clothing. If...if he were to get anything for her it would be placed on one hook while ones she did not like would be placed on another.

A tight forming shirt was her next try on. It was a stretchy material that had a halter top. Tight forming shirts were a big no no. She doubted it would look good on her but just to appease her curiosity of Sunstrreaker she tried it.

Tight forming clothing didn't get along with her stomach. She looked into the mirror and bit her lip. It looked good from the front but what about the back? In her struggles she had seen a multi mirror in the dressing room down the hall. Maybe she could sneak out there.

She opened the door peeking around if anyone would notice her in an odd piece of clothing. She was a T-shirt and jeans girl, rarely dressing up when needed. When she knew the coast was clear she made her way out and hurriedly made her way down the hall.

She slowly stopped just always from the mirror and slowly revealed herself. Felicity finally stood in front of it and found herself smiling. It was tight and yet...the back and front looked well. It was a smile she hadn't felt in a long while. She spun around to get a better look. The tie dye diamond pattered hid her stomach and slimmed her down very well.

Felicity stood with her arms to her sides and finally noticed the halter top went down very far and cringed. Sunstreaker probably didn't know she didn't like to be adventurous.

After considering the shirt once more, she registered the feeling of being watched and spun around hurriedly, facing Sunstreaker leaning against the doorway of the fitting room. He was clearly smug as he watched her. "Glad you like it."

Felicity crossed her arms over her chest to hide the skin exposed there. "How long were you there?" She whispered in a hiss. Her cheeks flushed a heated bright red.

"Not long." He shrugged one shoulder towards her stall. "I got more. Last load before we head out to another store."

She puffed her cheeks out and marched her way back into the stall refusing to meet his eyes. Sunstreaker watched with that same expression. Felicity ripped the top off and slapped it over the stall door. "Whatever you have planned, I'm keeping that, okay?" She admitted, defeated.

Sunstreaker let out a breath of laughter indicating his triumph over whatever he had indeed planned. "Are you going to finally enjoy yourself?"

Felicity ignored him and instead slapped another piece of clothing over. "That one too."

Sunstreaker took the shirts and flatted them out on the hanger. The woman came back with a smile. "Thanks, love."

She nodded and flurried away.

"Try on this and the dress." He gently handed them over the door.

A gasp came from the other side. "Sunstreaker, this is a bra!"

"I know." Was the bored drawl. "It holds your breasts in place. Yes, I know."

"Don't-don't ever say that again." Another gasp and groan. "How do you even know my size…?" Was the deadpanned yet horrified question.

And she would never know.

* * *

"Come out. Let me see." Relaxed and settling into a sort of routine, Sunstreaker, by now, found a chair and sat in it backwards in front of the stall she was in. They had been to most of the clothing stores within the mall. Weather she liked the brand or not, Sunstreaker would insist that she would go inside to just 'look around'. And because Sunstreaker was too damn good at playing barbie doll, they would indeed find something for her. At least ten bags hung by his arms as they walked their way through the mall. Felicity only hung onto a few bags, Sunstreaker insisting he held onto the heavier bags.

Sunstreaker seemed to be enjoying it more than she. Although, selfishly, she admitted, it felt good to be the center of attention for the day.

But that enjoyment was muted every time he whipped out a credit card shaped disk that had her narrowing her eyes every time he used it. It was definitely made of his holoform, or holomatter as he put it. And it worked each time. Sometimes though she saw his hand flicker or a part of his holoform cut out. But it happened too fast for her to come to a conclusion if it occurred or not.

He would turn to her and smile saying an 'onward' or 'let's go'. It was something that would distract her from the flickering out of existence that happened to the card. And each time it happened she forgot about it, less and less each time.

Despite this curious bit in her mind she tried on everything Sunstreaker would toss over the door. She too picked out a few t-shirts that had Sunstreaker grumbling under his breath.

Of course, after a while he would demand that she would come out and show him how it looked on her as they were doing now. Why, she didn't know. Again, her thoughts lingered on the possibility that he was just faking the compliments because femmes liked them.

"Let me see."

She jumped shaking her head from her thoughts. "Hold on!" She hissed from behind the door. "I don't wear dresses. The last time I did was..."

He was now awaiting a sundress that was a beautiful shade of light blue at the top that fringed a darker blue at the bottom. He rested his head on his forearm that was draped on top of the back of the chair.

Sunstreaker watched as she opened the stall and stepped out.

"Prom night..." Her words floated off as she watched him react. Sunstreaker lifted his head and studied her. Eyes moving along her body. It was at this moment she questioned if he really was faking it. No one has ever looked at her that way before. No one had ever changed their whole demeanor because of just the way she looked. Her cheeks flushed hotly again. She bowed her head.

Curiously and slowly, she turned around allowing him a full view. The smile disappeared from his face and was replaced with some sort of calmness. Content.

Felicity looked away when he hadn't spoken yet. Was he speechless. Or did she look bad in it? Her anxiety set in as she ruffled the edged of the straps.

"You...you like it?" Her voice was quiet. She flicked hazel eyes back to him and realized his demeanor had changed. It was sad and innocent. That caught her off guard. Did she indeed take his silence the wrong way?

He quickly recovered a little curve to his lips lifting. Emotions within surfaced and as he tried to show them. The woman knew he tried. She had never seen him like this before...

"It's beautiful on you." He confessed gently. Her smile that was growing drew dead. _The compliment_ was dead. It was deadpanned. She sagged her shoulders. Just when she had hope...He just couldn't get over his pride and tell her how he truly felt about her...He too became stiff upon the halfhearted confession.

Felicity knew the mech well enough to know he meant well...just...he was stubborn and she was used to it. But because she didn't necessarily expect what she was expecting, annoyance filtered into her mood.

"And, and I guess this goes on your magical credit card too?" The words were sad but underneath held a bit of annoyance. No, not annoyance, perhaps betrayal.

Anyhow, whatever it was he picked up on it very quickly.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" His words had a bite to them. Felicity cringed. He didn't realize he had been doing this all of the day to her. He hadn't explained anything. Hadn't told her what he was doing. He woke her up and told her to play along and in a way it was unfair. He _knew_ this was stressful without context. He _saw_ her eyebrows crease and flick to his hand when he hacked into each veriphone. He _saw_ this, yet that terrible thing called _pride_ kept in the way. He was a mech of few words who spoke with actions, loud and silent ones. Felicity knew he knew this too. But sometimes he failed on both fronts.

"Sunny-."

"Don't call me that." He said sharply. She hoped it wasn't anger towards her but to himself. He did that a few times in the past with her. When he grew frustrated with himself he acted out. It was an immature coping mechanism but in a way it was perhaps all he knew. Felicity saw that he caught himself too late. She responded justly.

"Where is this money _coming from_?" She indicated the bags nearby. "What are _you_ getting it?"

Another moment went by before her arms and shoulder sagged in realization. Her voice was heartbroken. "Are you _stealing_?"

IT was after another few moment that she could see Sunstreaker was mulling over his thoughts. Wrestling with whatever sort of demon he held within. It was so odd to see him like this. She wasn't scared but she knew something worse was coming.

"Why can't you accept what I'm doing for you and just accept it?" _Damn him._

She stepped out of the stall, eyes hard and critical. That something worse was overshadowed by the hurt. "Get over your damned pride and tell me!" Her voice was loud causing others look their way.

He stood quickly almost knocking the chair over. It had happened too fast. There was pain and the world shook a bit. A gaps and shout left her.

She caught sight of his eyes. They widened and in that moment he paused. He realized he was gripping her wrists tightly in front of herself and had brought her close. Her skin turned an angry white upon the unnaturally tight grip.

Despite it all she kept her stance firm. Out of fear or defiance she didn't know. Perhaps deep down she knew Sunstreaker would never hurt her.

After a moment she looked up into his eyes that were blazing bright blue. They stared each other down for a moment. Confusion. Hurt. Anger. Apology. All spoken and exchanged in a mere moment. Sunstreaker was the first to break away. Gently he lowered her arms to her sides and released his tight grip. The skin slowly went back to white, to red and finally to their original tanned color.

He bowed his head. "I just want to set things right." He repeated the same confession as before. It lead to nothing.

It was a long while before she moved. Too scared to perhaps trigger him again. She moved to massage her wrists. It was her turn to look away too. "This isn't your fault Sunstreaker…I thought I told you that." Her voice cracked upon how quiet it was,

He sat back in the chair heavily. "Please just trust me Felicity. I'll set things right again."

Silence again. "You never did anything wrong in the first place." She assured.

When he didn't move or speak, she sighed. The dress shuffled as she placed a hand on his head in comfort.

The woman wasn't all that surprised to find he flinched but relaxed upon the touch. "I think...It's okay to break through that wall a bit. I already did...so, so there's a point of no return and it's okay..." She murmured testing to see if her words would once again cause a reaction from him. He sighed slow and long. An agreement of sorts. He reached up to hold her hand and bring it to his lap. Another affirmation that her words were true. Gently he brushed fingertips where he had hurt her.

"When I lost him I never had anyone to lift me up when I fell. If anything, Felicity, I don't want you to go through the same…"

She flexed her fingers. "This is nothing like what you went through."

For a moment upon that surge of angry frustration he wanted to grip her wrists again. The grip twitched over her skin and she held her breath. "I lost everything! So did you..." His words were choked.

Felicity pitied the broken mech. She swallowed hard before bowing to gently place her forehead against his. After a moment of silence she lifted away and made him lift his head to look at her. "I fell, but you were already there. The day I fell onto my knees you were there to hold me. My parents, friends, neighbors, nobody would have done that for me. You're already a good person Sunstreaker. I know you don't think that but _you are_."

Sunstreaker looked into her eyes, so heavy and broken.

She smiled trying to make the situation light again. "You already lost your pride and ego to me. You might as well not hold anything back anymore."

The hand that was upon her wrist moved, brushing gentle fingertips across the skin before they were pulled away. He nodded once his demeanor changing again. Something more solid. A practiced facade. The walls came back up. "Sure." And the ego was back in working order to shield his delicate emotions and memories that laid within such a broken spark.

Felicity smiled. It was halfhearted. When she had figured that Sunstreaker was a complicated person just from first impressions it wasn't because she saw past his hard exterior. She read those unnatural eyes. She saw beyond. They were tired and aged despite how young he was.

Under those hard walls was a mech who was kind and true. Genuine. And that was hard to come by. A treasure.

"I collected loose money and excess funds from banks across the board." His voice made her jump, sucking her out of her thoughts. "Numbers and data. It was too easy to do. Your information net and systems are webbing compared to the walls of our technology. The card is just a gateway for me to access those ports call _veriphones_. A key to a lock. A few seconds and everything is accessed."

Felicity blinked. "Just using your holoform?"

He smiled a bit. "Correct."

"Can...can you hack anything?"

"The Decepticon hacked into POTUS within moments. We can crumble your world as you know it." The smile deepened.

She doubted him for a second and waited for a 'just kidding' but it never came. "Oh my God." She placed a hand to her forehead. "Just like...just like that?"

"Like that." He confirmed with a single nod.

It was silent for a moment longer before she pursed her lips and flicked her eyes over to him. "Can you look up a Suzy Carpenter? She owes me five bucks from elementary for lunch money."

Sunstreaker chuckled. It was good nurtured. It was nice. "Maybe another time."

Felicity sighed. "Right. So," The conversation wasn't going anywhere from here. "So, should we continue?" She said softly. "Now that I know you're not really stealing just...borrowing." She exhaled the word in humor. "I think I feel a bit better."

"Of course." Sunstreaker said making himself comfortable in the chair once more. He point to her. "Take that off. We're definitely getting that one."

Felicity looked down to herself. She liked it. Loved it as a matter of fact. "I'm starting to think I am just your doll that you can dress up..."

He ticked his helm."My credits."

"No..." She drawled as she walked back into the stall. "The U.S.'s money."

"If it makes you happy then I do not care who's credits they are."

She closed the door. Again the heavy and light sensation returned to her stomach. All doubts of his motives were placed to rest. These compliments were true just as the smile that Sunstreaker wouldn't be able to see, crossed her lips.

* * *

She had begged him for lunch or any sort of regular meal. If he were to buy clothes fr her surely a decent meal couldn't be much right?

When she had asked he practically jolted upon the very very important detail that, unlike them, they needed to, as he put it, refuel more often. He apologized and took her to the first place she saw.

Embarrassingly she couldn't stop herself or her hunger from quickly eating a meal from a chain restaurant. A sort of all day breakfast diner she enjoyed very thoroughly. She was starving. Bagged pretzels and peanuts and water bottles would only go so far.

She had also apologized to the mech many times as she ate. Sunstreaker however didn't seem to mind. As a matter of fact he was concerned, asking if she had eaten enough and apologized she was practically starving all day.

This lead to Sunstreaker remaining quite for some time. This meant he was thinking. Again. She paused mid bite to watch as he stared off out the window. His holoform flickered just so, a finger twitched. He had to be doing something.

"Sunny?"

Upon calling his name he quickly looked over to her and hummed.

"Oh, just making sure you're-"

"Finish up." He sat up to pay for the bill while Felicity hurriedly scooped the last of her eggs and took a piece of toast with her. She rushed after him tripping over the welcome mat as they left.

Afterward, she found out that his thinking apparently inspired him to a trip to the local super market. This time Felicity was following the holoform as he aggressively went aisle by aisle taking each product off the shelve with an accuracy that placed a soccer mom with four kids to shame.

Felicity remained quiet watching as he collected cereals, meats, and frozen pastries. Napkins to milk. Medications and to feminine products. Felicity remained silent even through checkout and even when they were finish she sat in the passenger seat with a sort of numb expression. That really happened. In what felt like an hour. She blinked and turned to the holoform sitting in the driver's seat.

"If I say I'm surprised at how much you can put in your trunk will you be insulted?" Was all she said to sum up the experience.

They managed to make their way out of the busy parking lot, a high end vehicle parking in a low class location was a sight for sure. Sunstreaker's engine rumbled as he slowly turned out of the parking lot and onto the road.

"Yes, and its called subspace. My alternate doesn't have a big 'trunk'." He sighed in exasperation.

Felicity pursed her lips into a flat line before a chuckle broke through them. "Junk in the trunk..." She cleared her throat.

"Ugh..." He rolled his eyes.

"Do you have a refrigerator to hold all of the groceries too? I mean, the meat wasn't necessary, I don't have anything to cook it with, wait, you do know humans can't eat raw meat. We're not meant to-."

Sunstreaker sighed in aggravation. "Alright, alright, enough." The mech grumbled placing his hand up to hush her.

Felicity quieted with an insulted expression."It was a legitimate question." She pouted.

"Also I hope you packed the egg on top. And the bread. I mean-whoa..." She stopped he eyes glued out the driver's side window. She had to lean a little over. Carefully, she placed her hands on his thigh to be able to look out the window. He grumbled pushing her hair aside to be able to see.

"...Look at that view." She said dreamily. The sun was setting casting an orange and yellow glow on the ocean water below and with it ending another day. Another day that was oddly filled with too much money spending and shopping. There was a sparkle in Sunstreaker's eyes that she didn't catch in time. He pushed her back into her seat.

He didn't say a word as he slowed down and flicked his directional light. Felicity raised an eyebrow. "Are we seeing the sunset? That would be kinda nice..." She hoped

"No."

"Oh...sight seeing?" Her blood froze. "Hiding?"

The panic set in. "A Decepticon?"

He was silent.

"Sunny this isn't funny. Is there another Decepticon!?"

They passed by expensive looking condos and Felicity looked around. Yes, this would be _a great_ hiding place wasn't it? Memories of the destruction from before resurfaced.

"Not here Sunstreaker, oh...please."

"There isn't a Decepticon." Again his answer was curt.

They turned up onto an another hill. Steep and tall.

She looked around when they reached the top. Another moment he stopped and cut his engine. Two muffled pops sounded as he opened his doors. Sunstreaker's holoform rounded the car and held Felicity's hand. "Get out."

"What are you doing?" She watched him with panicked eyes. "Sunstreaker seriously."

The holoform sighed and harshly gripped her arm and tossed her over his shoulder with ascary ease she never ever wanted to feel again. She was a heavy girl and he lifted her like nothing.

"Sunstreaker!" She yelled out. "Hey! _Hey!_ " Her cheeks turned red as he placed a hand on her butt to steady her. "You better move that hand if you want to keep it, _buddy_." She hissed lowly.

A chuckle left him as he walked along a sidewalk. Where it lead she didn't know she was hanging upside down and only able to life her head so much. He never removed his hand nor placed her down.

Sunstreaker stopped Abruptly and placed her down with ease. She stumbled a bit, the blood rushing a little too fast to her head. "You know what?" She looked around a little drunkenly holding her head with on hand. The sky was now a bleeding orange.

Sunstreaker stood there with a hand on his hip the other casually hanging by his side. "I hope you sincerely have an explanation for why we are in someones front yard."

" _Your_ front yard." He corrected too easily for her to catch on.

"Right. Okay..." She looked at the front of the small condo and stared at it and looked out at the view it offered of the bay bellow. It was breathtaking. It caught her so off guard it made her wish she could stay here until the night came. Stay here...wait.

" _Wait..._ " She looked back at the building then to Sunstreaker. "Excuse me?"

He indicated the condo by raising his eyebrows in a 'go ahead' gesture.

She looked back at the building.

And that is when she got it. When it clicked. When it truly set in. The true heaviness of everything came down to it all.

"My...front…?"

She hand went to her mouth as she fought a scream to rip from her throat.

He didn't...He didn't do this for her. It was _impossible_. But here she was. Sunstreaker said he could do anything. Rip their whole entire life down as he knew it. He said...anything could be hacked. So no, it wasn't impossible. Not for Sunstreaker.

Her knees quivered under herself but she felt Sunstreaker very close behind. Heavily she leaned against him. She looked up his, expression gentle and soft. The sunset highlighting that pretty face of his.

She turned to him fully, tears threatening to spill over.

"Sunstreaker…" Her voice cracked.

"You shouldn't be crying." He murmured.

It was then the woman broke into uncontrolled sobs. She gripped the sleeves to his shirt and bowed her head sobbing into the hard light human that felt too real.

Through the sobs she struggled to say thank you's. They were broken and sometimes incomprehensible but she knew Sunstreaker knew what she was saying. He backed her away just enough to look into her eyes.

Before he spoke she did. "I knew-I knew I was going to be fine with just you Sunstreaker, but-but this…" She wrapped her arms around him so very tightly. A grunt escaped his lips and his arms splayed out in surprise. It wasn't a long moment before they wrapped around her too.

She closed her eyes tightly. "Clothing, material things, food...not just these things make me happy. _Never._ Even...even this, Sunstreaker. I'm happy _believe me_ just... I think you, I think you just being with me does. You make me _so happy_..."

She couldn't see his expression or cut off what he was about to say because it was then she gripped his face and pressed her lips to his. He pretested a moment and released a surprised sound but before anything else could be done she backed away just as quickly to remain clutching him close. She felt him remain frozen from the sign of appreciation but he slowly released the tension.

He was silent this whole time but when he spoke, his rumbled words vibrated her chest in the best of ways. She closed her eyes. "Welcome home, Felicity..."


	10. Art Supplies

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Ten Art Supplies**

* * *

"At this point, I honestly believe you are a fashion designer with a side job of being an interior decorator." Felicity said shuffling out of her bedroom and into the new kitchen. "And maybe being an Autobot is just all a _ruse_." Before her, Sunstreaker's holoform was in a simple white t-shit and painter's pants. All around were tarps and plastic, protected what little furnishings she had.

He hummed, indicating he heard her. After another moment of laying down more tape, he turned around and walked a few steps from the wall.

Felicity watched with a hand on her hip and a smile, as he stuck his thumb up and closed one eye. He turned it this way and that. When he was satisfied with whatever he was measuring he turned to her with a curl to his lip. "The living room should be a deep red to bring out the material in the furniture."

"It's leather." She nodded moving to the coffee maker that gurgled and hissed. "Anything can honestly go with it. Especially with what you are doing." She said pouring a cup of coffee.

"That is the goal." He affirmed. He moved to the wall once again and brushed his hand over the painters tape assuring that it was a flush application. He backed away again and placed his hair into a loose bun ready to begin the next step. Felicity had to pause what she was doing to stare. He moved with agility towards the kitchen counter where measuring instruments and a few rolls of tape lay. "A few diamond designs would also break the red overbearing the room."

Felicity took a sip of her coffee and couldn't fight the fond smile that broke her lips. She could tell he was enjoying himself being in his element. That and the fact he meshed so well with human culture. He was learning everything for her sake. Anything he had learned was indeed for her sake and her sake alone. She lowered her cup on the counter with a tiny clack.

A month had passed since they had known each other. Another month laid ahead until the due date for the art entry. "A month..." She murmured out loud. She didn't intend for sunny to hear but he did.

He hummed another affirmation too concentrated on the way he he held a piece of tape with his teeth and carefully applied it to the wall. She remained silent as to not disturb such a critical moment.

She said nothing more and looked out the window to the sunrise. The condo that Sunstreaker selected had offered a beautiful view of the bay below and beyond. Later Sunstreaker had confessed that he selected this condo for just this reason.

For a week or so she and Sunstreaker had been renovating the condo to their liking using Sunstreaker's hacking abilities or what she called the magical credit card.

It was easy to find necessary things first. Other possessions would come in due time.

Felicity took a sip of her coffee. Excess was something she had never experienced and when she explained this to him he had agreed to only get was was necessary for now.

But until then he would do things to her living space as he please. And she didn't mind whatsoever. She swallowed, walking back into her bedroom and sat on her bed. Most of the place hadn't had much furnishing yet. Just the simple couch and chairs and a king size bed. The essentials as promised.

The condo was created for one person or a couple. Below was the garage that Sunstreaker was happily housed in. Going up the stairs on the side led to the hallway that opened up to the living room. On the far corner was the kitchen that had a curved counter that stretched from the left wall to the back wall. On the right was the bedroom that length the whole condo. The ceiling bay windows made up the whole right side of the room opening a beautiful view to the bay and road below. The master bathroom was nestled in the near corner.

Rent was on the expensive side. Sunstreaker said that she would make due with it somehow. Felicity bit her lip. She hadn't thought that far. Beyond when he would…

She took another sip of her coffee stopping that thought in it's tracks.

For the moment, Felicity simply dwell on the fact that she was blessed. That this beautiful place was hers, that Sunstreaker was there to never ever let her go. That he stayed despite the looming need to find his brethren,

Time was running out.

"Sunstreaker?" Her voice echoed. The space was still too empty but that was quite alright with her.

"Yes?" He soon answered curtly.

"Can we go to that art store you spotted a few days ago? I kinda want to get started on my painting..." It was silent after her request meaning he had halted what he was doing.

She heard his footfalls come closer until he was in the doorway leaning against it at his hip and rolling up a loose ball of tape. "Sure. You need new supplies after all." He raised an eyebrow knowingly before he walked back out into the living room. "And this time you will have my knowledge to help you select proper tools."

Felicity took another sip of her coffee and rolled her eyes. "Right." She breathed with humor. "You know, I've been painting for a long time too. I bet I know some things you don't know." She said, craning her neck over her shoulder towards the doorway.

She heard his footsteps again, this time purposeful and slow, until he stopped at the edge of the doorway with smirk on his face. He tossed the ball of tape to the side. "How long and…" He made his way over to standing just behind her. "...what are the things you know that I do not?" The holoform was looking down at her with a perfect grin.

Felicity raised an eyebrow, fully turned to him, and matched it. They were so close. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach. "Since I was a child." She said her voice quiet. What was this? Was this him being snarky? Flirting? No. _The_ Sunstreaker flirting? Right. "And-and that paintbrushes are made with either squirrel or horse hair." She recovered her voice.

For that moment his crystal blue locked onto her hazel eyes, looking deeper. It was something too intense for a moment like this. Something too intimidate...He bowed his head with a soft huff of laughter. "That long...?"

He turned away and Felicity released a breath she had been holding, slowly and quietly as to not make her emotions known. "Yes." She cleared her throat.

"Get dressed then. I want to continue my project as well."

Her heart still pounded in her chest and her breaths were choked and tight. She took a sip of her coffee attempting to act like nothing happened. Oh, but it had been already said and done.

She had indeed been caught in the moment and read far, far too much into it. "Damn it." She mumbled under her breath setting down the cup of coffee. She tried to smooth it out. Those panicked emotions. But they wouldn't go away so easily. She pulled her fingers through her hair and exhaled loudly and long, continuing to calm herself.

She turned to her closet. Right. Get ready. Get dressed. She willed her body to move but she found herself bumping against the bed and almost falling into it. She placed her hands on her face, feeling her cheeks heat up.

The little human finally made her way over to her closet, sliding the folding doors to reveal a wardrobe perfected by Sunstreaker. She moaned again, this time louder. It would take years to try and find something out of here.

* * *

He cursed under his breath as he left the room. His holoform disappeared with a quiet fizzle and he was once again focusing on his true form.

What the hell was that? What was that...that moment they held? It held on for longer than he thought, but apparently it was just a second. A mere moment. How did he get caught up like that…?

 _She's a human_ , he told his spark. _She's a tiny little human._ He reminded himself. He was a mech that held too many demons. Two entirely different species and yet… _No_. His spark ached against the casing. What was this? He felt aggravation and was that...? Was it fear? Nervousness? _Him?_

What he felt for her was companionship and nothing else. It was already hard enough to accept that a human had made it's way to his spark. No, that _she_ made her way into his spark. And that was a lie to cover up a truth he damn well knew.

He had confessed himself to her, who he truly was, had told her of his past. Allowed himself to be vulnerable and so very open to her. His innermost emotions shown on display for her to...accept them and take them as they were. She never shoved him away. She ... _needed_ him.

Him.

It had been a long while since anyone had come to him for security and It made him scared and nervous and in return _that_ made him angry. The unknown was always something scary. But he in particular didn't like it. Whatever was happening-.

"Are you ready, Sunny?" She heard her call down the stairs that led into the garage. His spark leapt at the name. He braced himself for the pain that was enticed from his spark from the name. There wasn't...any pain. There wasn't…

"Sunstreaker?" She called again. "You okay down there?" There was a sound of keys rattling together as she locked the door. Her footfalls were heavy but calculated.

"Yes. Just waiting." He activated his holoform watching her come down the stairs. She wore simple jeans and a t-shirt. Nothing special. She would warm up to the clothing she felt uneasy about. Sooner or later her confidence would grow.

The car door opened with a muffled pop and eased open in an upward arch. She slid into the seat and easily closed the door. She nervously smiled over the holoform. Her cheeks were still a deep red.

His eyes drifted to her hair. It had grown frizzy, perhaps from taking a shirt off. Sunstreaker hummed. He reached over and fixed it with one gentle hand. A small smile grew at the corner of his lip. All uneasy thoughts from before fizzled away and were traded with a calm content. When he was here...everything felt... _good_.

"Now are we ready?" She asked rhetorically with that Primus damn smiled.

Felicity shuffled a remote from his glove and pressed a button. The garage door creaked and began to open.

Sunstreaker pulled down the windows and started his engine with a sharp growl. Felicity took in a sharp breath. Had he scared her? Startled her?

"I will never get used to your lovely engine." She admitted her voice unsteady.

Oh. He excited her. He knew his alternate form was a form that many humans sought after. The Lamborghini was a status symbol.

But to this Felicity didn't seem to care for such status. She was humble. But when it came to that thrill that the humans sought she was not immune.

He reversed out of the garage and pulled out of the driveway.

When she was settled into the seat he looked away, easily keeping up the facade he was driving by placing a hand on the steering wheel.

The light expression was slowly trading for a grimmer one. As he drove his thoughts like to track their own way. Felicity had her elbow on the door her head leaning out of the window.

It was another hot day and the breeze felt wonderful. And as he looked at her now he realized how light she looked. How content and happy she was. The dark gallery where she had first met him was nothing compare to right now.

What he was feeling now within his spark was more than companionship. And the realization hurt his spark more than anything. The fear from before was not because he was a mech and she was a human. Not because these emotions were something he never felt before, no.

Whatever was happening he knew he couldn't have anything more with her.

And this he knew was a lie to protect the truth he very well knew: He didn't want to get too attached to her because in the end he would leave her behind when he found the Autobots. He looked away from Felicity as she waved to a random person on the street. He couldn't draw any closer to her. Those emotions he had tasted, just sampled being so close to her was something he could never have.

How he realized that yes he wanted her so close and allow her to dig deeper into his spark. He very spark was pulling at the two sides in a never ending battle of yes and no. And of course in the end, this was all because of her.

* * *

The art store he had spotted was down the road on a corner. It was a small little place, nothing to second glance at but it was noticed by him.

He was observant of the little sign that hung overhead the front entrance. On the worn out wood it proudly stated it was family owned and operated. Held the best quality tools, framing, and restorations. Sunstreaker parked on the side of road and rumbled to a stop.

A few on goers stared at the golden frame and holoform as he stepped out of the driver's seat. Although, deep down, he liked the attention, he didn't give them a second glance. Felicity stepped out finally and the on goers had by now looked away. Surprising himself though he wanted them to notice her too. She deserved to recognized. She was beautiful.

At this Sunstreaker quickly denied he ever thought this. She was beautiful artistically. Pleasant to the eye. Beautiful in proportions.

Anything to deny the growing way he felt about her. Anything to deny what strange things she did to his spark nowadays.

Felicity smiled to him hiding something.

"What is on your mind?" She was uncomfortable. Sunstreaker didn't want her to be this way. Not again. He wanted to enjoy the time they had together while he still had it.

He walked over next to her. Protectively he wrapped an arm around her waist and brought her close to his side. She was a masterpiece. Felicity raised an eyebrow at this. "You never held me like this in public before." She mused wrapping her arm around him too, placing her hand into his back pants pocket.

He jumped at the touch on his aft and raised an eyebrow. "And then again you haven't either."

She smiled warmly. "Touché my half a million dollar friend." She said nodding back to his alternate mode.

A small smile of humor crossed his lips to which she seemed more than pleased about. She had removed her hand from his back pocket and in return shuffled away from his hold. It was a gesture that went over his head for the moment. But the way she brushed down her side where his hand was something he did remember. But for now he did not pry.

They had made it across the parking lot and Sunstreaker went ahead in a few quick steps to open the door and allow Felicity to go inside first. A blush reached her cheeks along with a murmured thank you. He nodded his head once before following after her,

Compared to the hot air outside, the air condition inside hit them like a brick wall. "That feels great." Felicity sighed in relief.

Sunstreaker didn't mind the heat or cold. His frame adjusted to either perfectly. Extreme temperatures was only when he was in deep trouble and since on earth he hadn't come across such temperatures.

"Wow." Felicity's voice brought him back from such musings. He observed her closer. Realization struck him. It was as if she were a sparkling in a toy shop. How long had it been since she was able to step foot into a craft store? How long had it been since she was able to afford a paintbrush or paints? As an artist, it was torture to be deprived of such innocent pleasures.

Brushing fingertips across the tips of brushes, taking in the wide arrange of colors offered or once not known to the eye, witnessing sizes of canvases odd and traditional or simply creating your own, and the smell of wood and canvas seal.

"Where do we start?" She peeped. She looked to him with a lost expression.

Sunstreaker looked around. It was a small place, only three long rows of supplies and then a desk at the front end to check out. There was a framing center in the back and custom canvas shaping but that was it. Starting somewhere wouldn't be that difficult. They would be out of here in about an hour or so. Well, that is if he didn't get too lost in this heaven too.

The holoform smirked to himself. "Might as well start with the paints." He said. "Then we'll be able to pick out brushes and canvases."

"...And you're paying for it all again?"

"Yes." His voice was strict to further avoid any argument. But the strictness in his tone was nothing to worry about, the gentle grip around her wrist made sure of this as he led her towards the paints.

Rows upon rows of neatly placed paints upon pegs graced their eyes. Felicity stepped forward and smiled. "There's so many. It's been forever since I seen so many." She whispered. "I either got my paints at a dollar store or...just had them from when I was at home."

Indeed there were many colors. Bright to dull. Gray to black. They seemed to have them all. Watercolors, oil, tempera, and acrylics.

She took one in hand, a blue color. "Eight ounces for twelve fifty?" She took in a hissed breath. "Wow."

"Never mind that. Pick what you want." He said brushing his loose long hair over his shoulder. He too came next to her and began scoping the colors out. Crystal blues flicked to one color to the next. Humans were so creative.

"Any? How many? How many do we need? I mean just a few should do..."

"Pick what you want." He repeated.

"I mean I guess the primaries are alright I can just make my own-" She said offhandedly. "As a true artist that's what you're supposed to do right?"

Sunstreaker gave a side glace to the human. She still hated how she was getting spoiled by all her possessions. She shifted the bottle to her other hand. Then again it was her idea to come down here.

"I can't." She whispered.

He sighed. "We went over this..." He stopped himself. He should have known she would still have doubts. Even after the clothes, the food, the furniture and now this her humble conscience told her it was wrong despite his assurances. It was him who decided to do these things for her. It was his doing and his alone. She wouldn't be tracked down. She wouldn't be in trouble. It would be him. He would take the blame just so that she could live happily and pursue her dream that he never could because of war. But despite all of this her morals were still true.

Something Sunstreaker had not know for a very, very long time.

He pursed his lips as she looked up to him expecting him to continue with his exasperation. He stood where she was and reached from behind her. He held the bottle of paint in her hand in his own. Just as if he were instructing her, teaching her, his chest pressed against her back. She found this presence to be something solid and calming. Her heart rate would always slow and so would her breathing.

And just like before she reacted the same now. Her shoulders slumped and her breath eased. She watched as a bottle was selected.

His realistic breath poured onto her neck as he spoke. "Reds are good for depth," He said reaching for the said bottles. His voice was steady and strong calming her fraying nerves.

"Greens and blue express coolness and calm. You will defiantly need those." He held them in front of her indicating for her to take them. She did as she was hinted to do and because of this Sunstreaker continued.

"Yellow," he paused humming. "Adds joy and brightness to art."

"It does." She whispered tilting her head back so it rested on his shoulder. Her eyes were closed.

Sunstreaker tilted his head so that he could look at her. From above he could notice her eyelashes, long and plenty. They were perfectly curved and spaced, shivering as her eyes shifted underneath eyelids. He smiled. His spark sang. He continued to select colors. "Dark colors like purple and black add perception and distance."

She oped her eyes looking up to him as he focused forward. A small smile pulled to her lips as she looked at the bottles again.

"White is pure." By now more than twenty bottles were in her arms. He looked down and hummed. He pulled away from her and she turned to face him.

"We should have gotten a basket." She laughed.

Sunstreaker smiled. Short but noticeable. "Guess so. I'll be back. See if you like any other colors."

She nodded. "I will. Thank you, Sunny."

The appreciation was hinting to something ore, and to that he understood. Thankign him for steadying her frantic toughts and worries. He walked away and took a hand basket from the neat pile in front of the store. Too many were stacked and not in use.

When he walked back she deposited her armful into the basket. She selected a few more colors.

"How about brushes?" She asked quietly.

"Well, we aren't exactly finger painting, are we?"

"We could. I mean..." She left it open with a sly shrug.

He rolled his eyes. "As if." They both went down the next aisle. Next to the stencils, crayons, oil pastels, and colored pencils, were paintbrushes in all sorts of sizes, brush textures, handles, and designs. Fanned, to flat, to fat, to round, to small, and to even two bristles.

It seemed they had it all and Felicity couldn't just help herself. She rushed forward touching each of the bristles and handles feeling the weight and leverage it had. Sunstreaker allowed his apprentice to act with curiosity and excitement while he brought back old knowledge from way back when he held a brush and not a blade. He reached forward slowly, a sort of fond look crossing his features as slim calloused fingertips slid across the bristles. In his true frame he felt their softness and indulged in the sensation. Feeling such textures of brushes was a well know, yet unspoken and simple pleasure of each artist.

He traveled to a fanned brush that held a long orange handle. Plucking it from the cup it was displayed din, he twirled it and held it to the light. There were no fray bristles and they held in perfect uniform. It passed his standard of perfection. He placed it gently in the basket Felicity held in the crook of her arm.

Sunstreaker only glanced at the collection she was holding but paid no mind. She seemed more excited and childish than critical and serious. For the time being, he repeated the test on other brushes. He tilted his head this way and that, held them to the light, felt the leverage and balance each one had and, continued to make sure the brushes he were getting were well worth his excellence and hers. The price did not matter.

"All right!" He was broken out of his concentration to look over at an excited Felicity showing him a handful of rather dull and boring shaped paintbrushes. He scowled. "And…?"

She gave her brushes a second glance and then back at him. "I like them." She said about to place them into the basket. But he gripped her hand.

"Have you looked at the bristles? Were you not watching me? Did you feel the weight? Are they comfortable in your hand?" He showed her the ones in the basket. "These offer more verity and comfort, Felicity."

She creased her eyebrows in annoyance. "Okay, what if I don't like those ones? You have your own methods and so do I. I always brushed with these kinds anyway"

Sunstreaker growled. "Because you couldn't have these before." It was out before he could stop the words.

She recoiled and bit her bottom lip bowing her head. Her hands clenched around the brushes she held.

"And you're right." She murmured. "But...I don't want anything more than what you gave me."

He was a fool. An absolute inconsiderate fool. Since he could remember Sunstreaker had not cared about what he said to others, harsh or not, truth or lie. He did not care for others because in return they had not cared for _him_.

But since Felicity. Since he had met her. Words were careful little things. Careful pins and needles held close to a balloon or feathers upon the ear or audios.

Every waking moment with her he was learning that words had consequences to those that meant something. They held more dangerous intent than a blade.

Like he, she was born into poor situations. She never had much but what she did have was enough. There was a difference now since he came into her life. Of course having everything you ever wanted so suddenly could feel so lifeless and strange. But he was not doing this for materialistic selfishness, but because she deserved it. She had him for a security net. She had someone who cared. And he _did care_.

His eyes flicked to the brushes in her hands. Her hands were weathered and still broken and dry. Skin peeled at the palms and in between fingers. They were not feminine because hands that worked all their lives were hands that were scarred and broken. Just as he.

Sunstreaker reached forward and gently slid them out of her grip. "Each artist has their methods. I am sorry and you are correct. To change them when they have been the same all your life would be unfair." He spoke with a gentle voice.

She looked up to him, her annoyance and hurt disappearing and trading for something softer. It was an unspoken 'thank you' and appreciation. And was that pride he saw as well? It was a sparkle he could not quite read.

"I guess I can learn to use those too. You are the teacher, having about millions of years on me." She joked. "And besides I could learn new techniques, spice up the style I have."

"And perhaps I can learn some of yours as well."

The woman's smile was just as soft as the brushes he felt.

He became serious once again turning to face her. "If anything Felicity, if it will make you feel better...no more brushes after this."

She nodded. "That would be great."

* * *

As he examined another brush she watched him. She listened as he went on and on about the different shapes and sizes. How the handles with longer brushes offered more balance and less control while shorter ones offered more controlled strokes. She didn't mind it, some of it she knew already and some of it she had never heard before and even Sunstreaker came across brushes he had never seen. And when he did he was something so...childish.

His face would scrunch up and give it an offended look. "The hell…?"

She would smile and he would continue on and on saying how his brushes were metal and even made with other materials. Sometimes they would be metal itself working as a sort of fountain pen that humans had here on Earth.

Sometimes they were made with organic materials off planet. But mostly they served the same purpose: different strokes and different techniques.

All the while he thought out loud, his pupal also enjoyed watching the holoform. Whenever he moved it was graceful and meaningful, as if his actions were never put to waste.

"Would you like that one?" He offered after finishing up the lesson about this particular brush.

She nodded. He continued right along.

The little human smiled fondly. His arrogance was something that came to him naturally. He knew a lot and continued to spew information, to others he would look arrogant and pompous but she knew, closer, deeper than the surface, he was happy and content for someone to simply listen to him and share the same interest.

She knew it was one of the many walls he held up around his delicate core. She watched his expressions and his body language as he reached for another and yet another. The realistic fabric of his white button up shirt and dark pants moving in tandem with his motions.

After more than twenty minutes of searching through the reminder of the brushes they held a decent stash that was well mingled between each their preferences. The brushes ranged from eight something to well over twenty dollars. She exhaled upward causing her messy bangs to float momentarily. Guess that was the price of art. A price she had long forgotten.

"And this time do not leave them in the cups, you have a habit to do that and it makes my plating crawl." He moaned.

She made a sound in her throat to stifle the snort of laughter that wanted to come out. He looked ta her critically before turning away with a sound of exasperation. "Yes, teacher." She finally said.

Another groan.

She followed him to the next isle where accessories were neatly on display. They, once again, drifted to the acrylic section where wooden and plastic pallets hung. He chose a large and small one to which she agreed and was about to suggest. Alongside that he chose a paintbrush holder and empty closeable cups for used paint to be saved for later.

Sponges, sealers, and clear paints were selected as well as paint knives. He liked the metal ones with the wooden handle better simply for the traditional look. Plastic looked too cheap, he said.

They traveled to the back of the store and found a floor canvas holder. It was on sale for twenty dollars. Felicity eagerly scooped it up and found Sunstreaker himself smiling at her happiness at such a find.

She noticed him look over to the canvases and then a framing and restoration center to the side. She wondered why he gaze remained fixed on the old man standing in the center of the kiosk.

She knew that glare all too well. He was studying, observing, judging maybe. She went to open her mouth but he spoke. "Felicity, go to the canvases and pick a few sizes you like."

Felicity obeyed but before she could say anything else he walked away. "Oh, okay…" She mumbled watching him for a moment. She turned to the back wall and opened her mouth in amazement. She stepped forward with glee. There were so many sizes and value packs. There was a roll of treated canvas to make custom sizes, the wooden frames to the left of it in different lengths.

And in that moment Sunstreaker was forgotten.

* * *

Sunstreaker made his way outside. He walked to his form with purpose, his stride strong and proud. The late morning sun was now beating down onto his golden yellow painting absorbing the heat. It didn't bother him. The heat helped soothe old wounds and injuries still healing.

Because of habit he made it look like he opened his own driver side door with the holoform. The locked glove compartment was unlocked with a muffled pop and opened. Resting in it was the delicate sketch book that was kept wrapped in cloth. He gingerly took it out of the compartment and closed it.

The old human within the store was a curious human. He had seen many humans old and bright. But this one held something, a sort of grace that he recognized. Sunstreaker was too good at judging others, observing, and connection information if need be. It came with too many years of always having to watch your back for knives or traitors.

He backed out of the car and closed the door. He made his way back into the art store once again. But when he did, he noticed a 'help wanted' sign. It was missed before for the simple fact his attention was on Felicity. He noted it, making sure to keep it there in the back of his mind for later.

He made sure Felicity was still busy with the canvases. She was in her own little world turning around to lift a rather large canvas, He smiled and made his way to the frame and restoration desk. And still the delicate and frail human stood. His hand covered in dried ink and paint. Thin framed glasses rested on his nose.

Sunstreaker was taking a leap of faith to place so much trust into this human.

"Hello, sir." Sunstreaker surrendered the book onto the desk gingerly. He kept an assuring hand over the notebook, sadness and perhaps doubt creeping into his blue eyes. The man had watched him for a little bit before reaching forward wordlessly, taking the bundle from under his hands. His hands shook from age but with it came a sort of steady grace that only came from practiced artists. He flipped the cloth off of the cover and hummed.

"Can you restore and rebind it for me?" He asked lowly. If anything he wanted to fix one last thing for Felicity. Or at least give her something that she would remember him by whenever he left…if he ever would.

The old human lifted his glasses further up the bridge of his nose. He opened to the first page. Sunstreaker tensed but then assured himself. The man was being oh so delicate with those shaky hands of his. Another page and he realized his pointer finger was locked into place from age. "It will take some time but I will be able to do it, Sonny." He said with an assuring smile.

Sunstreaker jumped at the name but refrained from showing his shock. It was a term to call younger humans used by the older generation. His panic was quickly erased for a small sad smile.

"However long it will take." He assured. "Thank you. I'll pay whatever. I know it will be a lot of work."

The man looked up watery eyes shimmering under wrinkled eyelids. "Of course. Come back in four days or so. I haven't got much on my plate as you can see." He said with a laugh, placing the notebook gently into a drawer.

The holoform didn't remove himself as suggested by the closing of their exchange. Instead he remained hands clenching into fists. Sunstreaker couldn't help himself. He wanted to be assured one last time before leaving such a priceless possession. "I do not mean to be rude, but please take care of it...it means a lot to me."

The man smiled. It was assuring. "My family has passed this store down from generation to generation. We take pride in honor and servicing our artist community no matter how small it has become. You can place your trust in me, Sonny."

His words were scratchy and shaky from age but within that voice was pride. It was a vow and Sunstreaker felt respect for this human.

He bowed his head respectfully. "Thank you." He offered another smile and finally turned away. The man waved and smiled in return.

He walked to where he had last seen Felicity. It didn't take long to find her. In the corner of the store he heard a swear and then a loud crashing of items. He sighed knowing very well who it was.

Sunstreaker rounded the corner, Felicity was on the ground surrounded by fallen canvases that apparently came from the top shelf. He was impressed that she had managed to carry everything. After a moment of watching her struggle, he smiled with an exasperated sigh. "Need help with that?" He asked.

Felicity snapped her attention up to him and blushed. "Yeah, that would be great." She took the hand he offered her and effortlessly helped her stand. "Where did you go anyway?"

"I wanted to make sure they were hiring." He said in a knowing tone. He hoped it would catch her interest.

"Really? They are? You think they could hire me?"

Sunstreaker smirked. Hook, line, sinker. Perfect. "I wouldn't doubt it. You have experience. I wouldn't be surprised if they accepted you right on the spot." He said taking the four canvases and the canvas pedestal from her. She turned to place the fallen canvases back on the shelf.

"Do we have enough now?" She asked.

"If you are happy with everything then I would say yes."

Happy with her now cleaned up mess she took the basket in hand and in front of herself. "Yes." They walked towards the front of the store to check out.

"I would love to take the job. At least I won't feel entirely bad that you got all that stuff for me. I mean I could pay you back or something…pay for rent at least." She offered.

He hummed in distaste."Yes for the first, no to the second, and yes to the last." Sunstreaker said as they both got into line at the checkout. The cashier was a young woman about Felicity's age. She seemed overwhelmed. Sunstreaker raised an eyebrow. That was odd, this place was barely busy at all.

They were next in line and Sunstreaker stepped in front of Felicity. A minute smirk was her only warning before the smirk turned into a smile.

"Are you hiring by any chance?" He said placing the canvases on the counter.

She looked up to him and froze. A blush dusted her cheeks as she stuttered for words. "Oh uh, yes, would you like an application?" She said already reaching for it.

"Yes, that would be great. My friend here wants to find a job in what she does best." He said moving to the side to reveal a very annoyed Felicity.

"Really?" She deadpanned.

He shrugged a smile that was more like his twins was offered in consolidation. She huffed and waved him off. She was immune to such charm. It humored him to no end.

The girl however, looked disappointed from finding out she wasn't about to hire a Greek god statue. "Oh, sure." She still said politely, handing the paper to Felicity.

She started ringing up the items, the woman stealing glances from Sunstreaker. How cute. Felicity watched as the total kept creeping higher and higher. Sunstreaker stepped in front of her and made the message clear that she didn't want her looking. He did the same when they went on the shopping spree.

The woman pouted but obeyed looking away and distracting herself by reading the application.

The cashier cleared her throat feeling the air become too tense for her liking. "We could use the extra help around here. Granddad can only keep this place up for so long…" She said with a sad sigh.

So, that was why she seemed so stressed. Not by the business, but the lack of it. Such a shame. The values held here were something rare nowadays. Humans didnlt care much for morals and responsibility. Sunstreaker narrowed his eyes. But were his kind so different?

"Well, we'll become a regular. We live up the road in the new condo development." Felicity said making easy conversation with the girl. Sunstreaker snapped out of it when she spoke.

She slid a lock of blonde hair behind her ear. "We're also hoping that will bring more customers. Those homes offer such a beautiful view of the bay." She said with a smile.

She was done ringing up the items and placed them into paper bags. She was about to say the total out loud but Sunstreaker shook his head playfully indicating Felicity. "Oh, a gift. I see." She said winking and then blushing. "How nice of you."

She was now convinced that he wasn't available either. Sunstreaker easily swiped the holoform card down the reader and typed in his pin number.

Everything was set.

"Hope to hear from you soon!" She said with a friendly wave to Felicity.

"Yeah, me too." She said with a polite smile while also helping Sunstreaker carry the bags and canvases. He held the canvas holder under one arm.

They walked out of the store and Felicity immediately groaned. He raised an eyebrow at this and realized the temperature was slowly going up as the afternoon rolled around. He was going to make sure to turn on the air condition for her. He also realized her cheeks were still a gentle red. He smirked to himself. He always made the femmes flustered.

"You had to do that didn't you?" She pouted.

"It worked didn't it?"

When they reached Sunstreaker's form he popped open his front hood placing the art supplies into the trunk.

He had dumped the supplies in, leaving Felicity to organize and grunt with annoyance. "Yeah but that was just cruel. She really liked you."

When she was done she closed the hood careful not to slam too hard. He watched her look up through the windshield. Sunstreaker was already in the car.

He had the air conditioning on for her when she stepped in.

He didn't answer back but laughed at her. It was quiet as Sunstreaker backed out of the parking spot and to the exit.

"What you said back there. Is it true?" She asked as he pulled out of the parking lot.

He scoffed. "About what?" He turned onto the road going up the hill.  
"About loving what I do best."

He frowned. "Of course. You are the best, aren't you? I think that you should think so." He found himself lying less and less around her. Working there would be for the better. It was close to home and she didn't have to work at that strip club anymore. Even though it paid well she would have better working conditions and worked with what she loved the most. "I thought you would enjoy it."

"No, I know. I want a job as a matter of fact. To pay the rent at least." She murmured.

"As long as you're happy that is all that matters." He also found himself speaking truths more and more. Later on he never regretted saying it. It made her smile afterward. That's all that mattered. All that mattered...


	11. Brushes

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Eleven Brushes**

* * *

It was only an hour ago that Ratchet, Ironhide, and Optimus had arrived at the nearby military base. A day trip to the west coast was smooth and trouble free. When the N.E.S.T. team arrived they were transported by the Autobots. Staying in vehicle mode would provide cover from any curious eyes and protection for their human comrades if anything would arise.

Now, after local military and personnel were cleared and transferred from their new temporary base, they were allowed to roam freely in their bipedal modes.

An N.E.S.T. officer led them to a restricted hanger. The human below them held a tablet filled with information he was reading off. "We kept the Decepticon in this hanger in case the evidence would come in handy." The hanger's gates were open and the smell of old energon burned the Autobot's senses.

"The energon is still decomposing so suits are advised for humans." He said stopping at a rack with silver suits. Lennox raised an eyebrow and placed the suit on with no arguments.

The Autobots however, were looking at a mangled, once white, now grayed, Decepticon carcass. "Primus…would you look at that." Ironhide murmured.

Optimus narrowed his optics at the carnage in front of himself. On a large metal gurney was the still bleeding and offline Decepticon. He didn't know if he detected appreciation or horror in his weapon's specialist voice. He, however, was feeling neither. War had made him numb to the sights he had seen.

Nothing compared to this.

"As you can see, extensive spark damage was inflicted on the mech."

Ratchet stepped forward as the humans did. He scanned the still frame and let out a long tired vent.

Everyone was waiting on his analysis. "Well, let's start out with the obvious damage." He stepped forward transforming his finger into a flashlight sort of tool and leaned over the mech's inner workings.

"Dislocated left arm, lacerations in exterior armor and underlying protoform, energon leakage." He paused looking at the mechs' chest where there was once was white plating. "Spark pierced and mangled beyond repair. Cause of death: Spark extraction."

He looked down upon the frame seeing that there was an exit wound. Ironhide walked forward with a hum. "Defiantly a blade." Ironhide said tapping the outside of the wound. He noted the permanent smug smirk on the mechs faceplates and huffed.

"Bastard." The hulking Autobot mumbled in Cybertronain.

Optimus looked down at Lennox seeing his doubt. "An Autobot couldn't be that...violent? Could they?"

Ratchet shrugged. "Depends if feral instincts or defensive protocols took over. Cybertronians are more predatory than you think."

Ironhide's breath of laughter broke through. "Look at the spark though. The exterior ridge is smooth but then it's shredded to pieces through the back. If it were a quick strike it would be smooth."

"Someone was enjoying this and knew where to hit." The medic concluded.

Optimus's vent hitched at the realization. Only a few mechs that were Autobots wielded swords or melee weapon as their primary source of defense. A handful were so deadly. And only a few could be this violent.

Ironhide looked up to his leader upon the sound of his vent hitching. "Well I'll be damned, Prime."

Ratchet crossed his arms and bowed his helm. "So...all this time...he is really alive."

"There is only one mech in my ranks that has been known to discharge Decepticons with such taboo methods."

"Sunstreaker." Ironhide said with a nod of his helm turning to Ratchet "He's survived all those years without his brother."

"Should be impossible but if it is true that it is him, the evidence in this body supports it." Ratchet's words were heavy.

Lennox shook his head. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. You mean to tell me that an Autobot did this?" He said indicating the Decepticon with a stern hand.

The Prime looked down at the human and nodded his helm. "Sunstreaker and his offlined twin were part of the gladiatorial pits in Kaon before the war. There, is where they learned their violent battle skills and were awarded with the deadliest weapons on Cybertron.

"Twin-Cybertonian blades." Ironhide said with a smirk. "Lovely, but deadly. Only a few can master such weapons. They are just as rare as the twins were."

"Are." Ratchet grumbled. His correction was on deaf ears and audios.

"Why did you keep them if they themselves were against the Autobot rules? What you guys stand for?"

Too many times had he answered this very question. It was almost routine and it brought back a bad taste on his glossa. "They were loyal, trustworthy, and fine warriors among my ranks. Without them we would have not lived to see another day in some battles."

"Okay..." He started carefully. "So they did your dirty work is what you're telling me?"

"In so many words, yes, Major." Ratchet answered for Prime. A look was pointed in the direction of the Prime. An unreadable one that held some sort of unresolved distaste.

The major was quick to move the conversation forward. "You said his brother was offlined?"

Ratchet stepped in once more. "Because they were twins they shared one spark. After Sideswipe was offlined, Sunstreaker turned for the worse. His violence stirred again. With only a half spark he is bound to fade away."

"Christ." Lennox bowed his head. "So, so where do we find him?"

"If he has not contacted or detected us by now it would be a wise guess that his communications and location beacons are offline." Ratchet said.

"Our best guess is to wait until he comes to us." Ironhide said crossing his arms. "And judging by this sorry aft here, that won't be long. He's hungry for blood."

Lennox swallowed harshly. "The hell kind of mech you got here, Prime?" He murmured.

No one answered the human. Perhaps they themselves didn't know...or did not wish to touch such a topic. Ratchet turned away from the body.

"What do you want to do with the body, Major?" The man next to him spoke, timidly keeping quiet until now. "Do you want to put him in cryostasis to preserve the remains for future experimentation?"

Lennox sagged his shoulders in disappointment. Optimus stepped in immediately. "Absolutely not." His tone was quiet yet strict.. Both Ironhide and Ratchet nodded their helms, agreeing with their leader

"While the Decepticons are our enemies, we are of the same race. We do not wish for this mech to be used as experimentation or any sort of advantage to your race."

"Humans are not to be trusted with our technology." Ironhide said with a huff.

The man next to Lennox was shaking at the knees. "It will be done." He said shakily.

Nobody dared to disobey Optimus's decisions.

* * *

_Four days later_

Sunstreaker was happy to bring Felicity to her first day of work. Felicity on the other hand wasn't as thrilled. It had been a very long while since she had had a decent and steady job. A job that didn't require her to look over her shoulder every now and then or stay close to a bouncer.

She swallowed harshly once more. Sunstreaker tilted his head in her direction.

"You will be fine." He said with a charming smile.

She looked at him. She appreciated his genuine words. She really did. So, she matched that smile and hummed. "What made you think I wouldn't?"

"Well, you're stiffer than a rock and you haven't stopped gulping since we left. So, maybe fake that smirk until you make it." He opened the passenger side door for her.

A seething glare was pointed at him as she got out of the Lamborghini and made her way across the parking lot. Despite it all she could feel Sunstreaker's protective glare on her back. She combed her fingers through her hair and looked behind her. He flashed his headlights before turning his engine and rumbling out of the parking lot.

As she entered the store he opened his engine up allowing a rev to rumble down the street. She rolled her eyes, this is why he told him not to drive up to the front of the store. " _Showoff."_ She mumbled.

"Felicity!" She heard her name being called out by Claire, the woman that gave her the application the first day they came to the art store.

She was currently waving her over to the cash register. "I'm glad you could make it today."

"Yeah," She smiled with a laugh but then shrugged. "Well, I'm not really busy so..."

The blonde haired woman smiled in return. " _So,_ let's get started on your training."

For the whole day Felicity was taught how to stock, work the register, and how to take orders over the phone for certain items. Of course it was all the simple stuff. Since Claire's father, an old man that owned the store and took a specialty in restoring and framing art pieces, couldn't lift heavy items because of severe arthritis and age, it was a job for Felicity and her.

Among conversation Felicity had learned that the art store wasn't getting the attention or business it used to. Ever since a newer and bigger outlet opened not too many blocks away, customers were a rarity. They sought the cheaper supplies without the customer service and personal level of business, it seemed.

"So that's why I hope you don't mind minimum wage for now." She explained.

Felicity placed another bottle of paint on the shelf. "I don't mind. I enjoy this actually. It's sad that not a lot of people come here though. I think this place is great."

"Really?" She said hope in her voice.

"Sure." Felicity tilted her head this way and that. "It's not too small or big but just right. There are many selections and verities of supplies. Good for advanced artists or those who want to dip their toes into the water. I bet if someone were to just get you guys out there you would do great."

A growing smile was on the woman's face as she listed to Felicity. "Thank you for that. We don't get those sort of compliments here. Since we struggle with this place and all, it's good to know we're still doing well in some way."

Felicity paused, lowering the bottle in her hand that was ready to be put on the shelf. She was surprised at her appreciation. It was really nothing but to her it was everything. She smiled with a nod. How simple kindness was, and how it changed someone greatly.

"Never a problem, Claire." Was her reply as she placed another bottle on the shelf

* * *

_Two days later_

"No, like this. You are doing the same mistake over and over again." Felicity blinked as Sunstreaker leaned in close from behind. Despite the frustration that took over, she felt his amazingly realistic hair flow over his shoulder onto hers. And despite the frustration, she paused not knowing what to make of their close proximity. She was still getting used to his random signs of affection, well _his_ definition of affection. Like a simple touch of her hand or a small smile that only curled that little bit of his mouth. Or just a gentle discipline just as this.

She took in an unsteady breath as he rested his chin on her shoulder and then took his hand onto hers. Gently he pushed the hand farther back on the handle of the brush and swept the paint on the canvas. "You want the brushstrokes to be visible. It's up to the viewer to see what they're supposed to. Loosen your wrist."

Her chest felt tight and her legs became lead. What was this?

He backed away and observed her once again. "Relax. You're too stiff."

Of course she was! Didn't he see what he did to her? Just with simple touches and being so close her heart felt like fire, _lightning_. Felicity let out an aggravated huff. "I know, I know."

"Clearly, you need to-."

"Sunstreaker." She turned around and faced him with strict eyes.

He flinched and it was too late for Felicity to push back the tantrum he was going to put on. He was like a loaded gun. _Bang._ And just like that he was off. He was an untamed flame ready to burn down the forest. A ripple that could create waves. He was something else... "I'm just trying to help! You want me to teach you or not?"

" _You_ need to relax." She insisted gently. "Something is bothering you. Ever since you woke up."

Whatever was bothering him, he wouldn't; open up that easy. Not outright. That would be too easy. She bit her lip nibbling a bit of loose skin. She had to be brave. The human placed her paint pallet and brush down on the nearby desk. Hesitantly she gripped his forearms. He jumped from the contact. Never really did she ever touch him outright. It was a shoulder bump here, and maybe a quick whack of her hand there. And maybe just a tap on his shoulder but this...her grip slid upward holding his shoulders with a firm and steady grip.

He looked away from her, pouting. She smiled at his immaturity. Felicity forced herself into his line of vision. Anger and annoyance were forgotten. Her words were gentle. "Tell me." She soothed not noticing she was brushing her fingers through his so realistic hair.

"It's nothing. I need to recharge. That's all."

She noticed how truly tired he was then. It was heavy and his holoform felt lighter and not as solid as it used to. "Then why didn't you say something? I don't mind if we stop. We have plenty of time before the art is due."

"No, we need to continue." He said pushing against her. His words were holding something from her. She was almost in reach. These game she played with him were so exhausting but so very necessary.

"No. You deserve to rest after everything we went through…" She found her voice drifting out and silencing. When was the last time he had a decent amount of recharge since he basically reset her life? "Sunny..." Her voice cracked. The woman felt guilt. Heavy and bearing down.

He turned back to her, looking down at her in concern. "What?"

"I need you to go recharge right now." Why was he sacrificing so much for her? He was injured and he needed rest despite it all he was building her home, teaching her art, and most importantly staying by her side.

"Why? I'm fine. I told you I'm just tired. I'll recharge tonight. There's no worry."

"I am though. I am worried." She held his neck in her hands bowing her head.

She felt him freeze upon the contact. His hands were by his sides in shock. It was an assuring grip, one that was more intimate than she would admit but it _felt right_.

Slowly he lifted his hands and placed them atop of hers. She looked up as he tilted his head brushing a cheek against her hand. Dark hair fell atop his shoulder. He was something beautiful.

"My wounds will heal. And I will rest tonight. But you are my priority. I promise I will be fine."

Her eyes were stinging as she watched him. His eyes were half lidded looking down to his hand holding him. It was such a gentle expression. Tired and heavy. But his words were a promise and she held that to him.

She released her gentle yet intimate hold on him and bowed her head.

"Can we continue?"

"Yeah..." She murmured.

He recharged that night.

* * *

_Five days later_

It was true. He was indeed having a hard time recharging at night. He 'slept in' as Felicity said more and more. He didn't lie when he said his wounds would heal. But it took too much time. His arm only hurt the slightest and his frame held a dull ache. The lack of nannites in his frame were the culprit. Without them, systems were bound to lag. So recharge was the compensation. His recharge was anything but restful. It was strained. His systems lagged too much to be able to fully shut down. A sort of stasis licked at his consciousnesses when he fell into a rare too deep recharge. He would snap out of it and then lay awake for hours on end, observing Felicity's vitals as she slept soundly to pass the time.

A drive would only consume energon he didn't have. So they were kept to a minimal. Transforming sounded pleasant but then again he couldn't have that luxury. Sunstreaker kept Felicity in his forefront. His own needs would come later.

His selfishness was almost foreign to him now. Taking care of her was something too rewarding. Her happiness was the gauze upon old wounds. And no matter how many times he mulled over these thoughts in the waking hours of the night he couldn't figure it out. Couldn't crack that specific code.

He was brought back from his thoughts when Felicity dabbed her brush into the red and then the orange paint awfully violently.

He tilted his head toward her. "Hey, easy."

He was ignored and he pouted. She diluted it with a dab of water and then quickly and forcefully stroked the paintbrush across the canvas causing paint to splatter on the canvas holder. Sunstreaker raised an eyebrow at her unusual temper and harshness.

He sighed in exasperation and decided to take the bait. He uncrossed his arms and pushed himself from the wall he had been leaning against. "You're mad."

"Yes."

"Should I guess why or should you just outright confess?"

She stopped turning to him with that fiery glare that could match his.

Ah, femmes were emotional creatures weren't they? "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I don't like beating around the bush." He shrugged.

"Well, then wish I could say the same for you. God that's all I ever do with you. Emotional emo bastard."

Again he bowed his head with an exasperated sigh. "You just want an excuse to beat me up verbally."

" _Maybe_." She tossed the brush into a cup of water. He glanced up and watched the water bleed with an orange-red. He flicked his optics to the woman and waited. And waited.

And soon enough her fire was put out in a puff of smoke. Her shoulders sagged and her face relaxed in too easy of defeat. She was something predictable now. She had every delicate fire that couldn't last for very long. It was something fierce when it wanted to be though.

She took in a deep breath and sighed it out, long and steady. She sat heavily on her bed and Sunstreaker walked to stand in front of her. His hands were in his pockets casually as he waited.

"I think you're going to leave." She said in a low voice that broke his spark. "It's selfish, I know, but after I submit my art I feel like you'll pack up and leave me."

He remained silent for a long time and she made no fuss about it. He shifted his weight looking out to the bay below. It was sunny today. So many humans took advantage of this.

"It's not selfish." He murmured quietly.

She didn't move or make any motion to speak. Sunstreaker was about to move forward and truly make sure she was alright but stopped upon her too tiny voice.

"You didn't deny it. Why would you? God, deep down I knew. I know you will. You have your duties I suppose and you're in war. I'm just a pesky human...and-."

"Yeah, you are." He scoffed rudely, cutting her off but upon her surprised expression he smirked. "But you have helped me a lot, 'city. In so many ways that I can't tick off right now."

Her eyes glistened and they flicked over his expression searching for whatever it was she was making sure of. "Really?"

"Yes."

"So you won't leave?" She hoped.

Sunstreaker left the question unanswered.

* * *

And because of that question was left untouched for so long, it haunted him that night. On top of the lack of being able to recharge correctly he mulled over that desperate question she asked. Their time would come to a close eventually. When it came would it be just as torturous and difficult as he predicted?

And along with this torture his frame was denying him decent rest. His systems were straining now. His nannites count was critically low, used to repair the plasma wound in his side, which, without medical attention, healed incorrectly.

Nannites in a Cybertronian were the equivalent to white blood cells in a human. Except in a Cybertronian, the nannites had to be replaced once used. If he ever found the Autobots, their medic would have a time with him. Fixing his sorry aft was always a fun time.

His mind would not stop racing. Lack of rest. The troubling thoughts of leaving. He was his own enemy when it came to his thoughts. No longer strong enough to box them up and put them away he activated his holoform, stepping into living room in annoyance. He brushed his fingers through his hair holding clutching his head for moment before letting his hands fall. He made his way into the kitchen. For some reason he settled on trying to find Felicity to get his mind off of his inner musings. He didn't find her there.

It wasn't that late. Usually she stayed up to read or watch her mind numbing soap operas.

He hummed making his way into the bedroom. He stopped dead in his tracks seeing Felicity lazily and diagonally sleeping in the bed. On the floor was a book she once hand in hand. Sunstreaker sighed. How she ended up in this odd position, Primus only knew.

He walked to her side and carefully straightened out her legs and then her upper body. Perhaps to a normal human she would have been heavy but to his holoform she was light as ever. He pulled the blanket over her body.

She mumbled in her sleep causing him to freeze. He didn't want to wake her from her well deserved rest. Once he knew she fell back into a slumber he continued to pull the blanket towards her chest.

The holoform backed away and studied her resting form. She was peaceful, her face was relaxed and her breathing was steady. In this state she was mesmerizing. A smile pulled at his lips. At least she was getting some rest.

He turned to walk away and noticed her painting towards the windows. He grumbled upon seeing the open paints and brushes in the water cup. He glared over at Felicity hoping she would feel it in her sleep. He sighed wearily and began to clean up the paints and brushes.

A few trips to and from the kitchen sink cleaned the brushes. He made sure with precision that they were sculpted back into their original form. He placed them in a cup upwards and sighed at his efforts. The paints were lined up neatly on a nearby shelf and the used paint was discarded.

He was now studying her work of art. His eyes scanned over each stroke and each color used. Each paintbrush and each object in the painting. It was half finished but it was her best work yet.

"Sunny…"

The holoform flicked his eyes over to the human. She was currently still and quiet, sleeping. Sunstreaker turned toward her and watched her for a moment longer. Was she dreaming? She suddenly shifted uncomfortably, face scrunching up in pain. The woman called out his name again.

He made his way over to her and sat on the side of the bed.

Sunstreaker was hesitant to reach his hand out like he did that night so long ago. He didn't understand why he paused. She had touched him willingly that day. So what made it different if _he_ touched _her_? He finally reached out and gripped her hand in his, intertwining his fingers in hers.

Sunstreaker had done this so many times before when he was painting with her but the emotions behind the gesture were so different now. He brushed a thumb over her hand and in return she gripped it gently. He held his breath. He was about to let go and pull back but she gripped it more. "Don't go. Stay here."

Sunstreaker watched as she opened her eyes and wearily looked up to him, tears had formed. A nightmare. About what he could only guess, but seeing her this way made his spark ache in a way he hadn't felt in a long while.

She looked down at her hand in his. Her voice was garbled but he understood her all too clearly. "You protected me…gave me a home. You gave me so much but please just one more thing, Sunny. I want _to be selfish_. Just thisonce." She whispered.

" _Just, don't go."_

Sunstreaker's spark felt like it was suffocating. He set his jaw. His eyes burned but he willed his emotions away. Reluctantly he released her hand and stood for a long moment contemplating to leave.

She sucked in a breath of fear and sat up.

Their eyes met and for a moment the world was quieter than it was. Hazel blues met crystal blues that seemed to glow in the dark.

He moved against his will climbing onto the bed. She turned towards him wrapping her arms around his body and he brought his holoform close to hers. Chest to chest they intertwined and lay. A sound so desperate left her as she bowed her head under his own. She couldn't have clung any harder but to him it felt more securing that anything he had felt in a long while. With it came a song that rang through his spark and frame. With it came the peace of the moment. Nothing else mattered. Not the fear of leaving behind his human or the Decepticons or his spark giving out one day.

A sound just as desperate left his throat as he willed his eyes closed.

Just for now they would lay and be together. Just for now could they both rest and not fear the coming days. Just for now could they lay.


	12. Contour

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Jesus** **this chapter was a monster. Three cups of coffee were not enough...so apologies for mistakes**

* * *

**Chapter Twelve Contour**

Sunstreaker groggily onlined. His holoform was still activated but in a dormant state. He let out a long vent before he focused his attention on the holoform. Sunstreaker opened his eyes and blinked. He was still intertwined with Felicity. Memories from last night came flooding back in a wave.

The desperate need to be so close to one another was something so strange but not unfamiliar. It was a need that was protoform deep. Something his spark craved. But despite this strangeness he had recharged. Peacefully. Without slipping into a stasis. He stared at the ceiling not exactly sure how to go about these thoughts, events, or for that matter moving and peeling himself away from the human that wrapped herself around him. He didn't want to disturb her. If he de-materialized his holoform she would wake up from him no longer supporting her upper body. They weren't that intertwined...and yet the fear of waking her was something so innocent.

Her legs were intertwined with her own and his arm was wrapped around her chest hand resting upon hers.

He grumbled quietly. The things he got tangled into. Literally. In a stalemate he decided to just lay there for a little while longer. Felicity would wake up soon anyway. It was almost nine o' clock.

Sunstreaker took his time allowing his true form to rouse from recharge. He felt somewhat rested but still groggy from the lack of nannites in his frame. He could do nothing about it though. It wasn't life threatening but just something that bothered him if anything were to arise.

Too deep in his thoughts, he didn't realize that he started to circle his thumb on Felicity's hand. It was a soothing motion he didn't recognize he started. To his own surprise, Sunstreaker didn't stop the motion as well. He enjoyed being close to her like this. It felt right and filled the void that was left behind by his brother. The fact that she was a human didn't cross his mind either. She might be the only human that could possibly get this close to him. _The only being_. He corrected his thoughts.

Felicity hummed in her sleep, shifting. Sunstreaker gently raised his arm and allowed her to roll onto her back. His legs were no longer intertwined with hers but now she was laying on his arm. His other one was free.

He swore quietly to himself. He was so close to freedom. "C'mon Felicity…" He whispered pulling his arm from underneath her gently. He finally freed his arm and shook the tingling he felt from the light particles being so compressed. He shot an annoyed look to her but let it fall into a pout and then to something fond.

It seemed like she was the only one who could also make his arm feel numb and get away with it or else she would have been kicked onto the floor. Something Sideswipe would have been subjected to. A huff of laughter upon the fond memories.

Sunstreaker sat up and slid to the edge of the bed. He peered over his shoulder. Still sleeping. He leaned forward and stood up. His holoform was so numb. He grumbled from the over usage and made his way into the kitchen. He opened a few of the blinds allowing the early morning sun to pour through.

He walked over to the coffee machine and turned it on for Felicity.

He would think how much the human depended on the caffeinated drink it was a matter of life or death. Sunstreaker made sure to scoop enough coffee into the filter for her. She liked it dark and strong.

Back on Cybertron they had similar sort of methods. Instead of caffeine, boosters or minerals would be used. Caffeine and the ingredient on Cybertron did the same thing. Enhance performance and chase away last night's parties. Lithium was good for energy. He liked mercury in his energon. Sideswipe liked gold. But, those luxuries were long in the past. Since the war, energon rations were as good as it got. And those themselves were already diluted.

The brewer hissed and gurgled before the first drop came down into the pot. The aroma it gave off was soothing just like the chamomile teas Felicity drank.

She always made sure that she had them on hand, resting on the kitchen counter. Next to the boxes of teas was a calendar hanging off of the fridge. He saw that Felicity had her work schedule all written out.

When she applied at the art store down the road she, of course, got the job on the spot. With her artistic knowledge and how close she lived also helped her. She was adapting well. She enjoyed it. The first paycheck had her ecstatic. It wasn't much but it was something that had her proud of herself. And that was all that mattered.

He turned away from the fridge and rolled his shoulders. The holoform was still stiff and uncomfortable. He felt caged and confined and hadn't taken much of his frustrations out on the road lately. He couldn't take the chance of doing more harm to his already strained frame. He was stir crazy. Wasn't that what she had called it?

Maybe...maybe just a short drive would do some good. Maybe he could find a secluded area and just stretch. It had been so long. Too long as a matter of fact.

Sunstreaker took out a pad and pen and wrote down a note for Felicity saying that he would be gone for a couple of hours. His holoform disappeared and his engine came to life. He made sure to leave the garage quietly not to wake Felicity. Once he was down the road he allowed his engine to rumble and roar as he accelerated.

* * *

The couple of hours he promised were actually turned into most of the day. He was long off of the highway deeming it senseless if he were to remain at eighty miles an hour and burn energy.

For now, it felt good enough to keep driving aimlessly at a slower pace. It was relaxing and it gave the mech time to think. About what, he wasn't certain. His mind leapt from one subject to the next but the most bothersome of them all remained. What was he going to do once Felicity submitted her art? Would they accept her this time? Would they turn her down? Would they try again? What happened if he found the Autobots? How would he be able to leave her behind?

That damned question again. The question that burned him hotter than any coastal weather or plasma burn.

His engine growled in aggravation. He needed to stop thinking. But it was so hard to do so. Driving was his way to vent _and_ think. Time was running out for him and her. He needed to find the 'bots before anymore Decepticons showed up or his condition became worse.

It was a dangerous waiting game he had no choice but to play. And all of this was kept away from Felicity. For her safety and sake. She was too happy as of now. Everything was falling into place for her. He wouldn't allow anything to ruin this. Not if he could help it.

There was but one last piece remaining though.

He remembered the old scrapbook that he had restored. It had been more than four days, so surely the old man had it restored by now. Sunstreaker made his way down many streets and small alleys and finally arrived at the art store.

He could pick up the scrap book and visit Felicity as well. He knew she was more than capable of herself but making sure she was alright at all times was a nagging feeling that developed more and more as he spent time around her.

As always, the mech parked himself away from the rest of the humans and allowed his holoform to materialize in the driver's seat.

Sunstreaker opened the door and got out allowing himself to close it. He wore simple gray pants and a short sleeved polo. A black fedora completed his look. His hair was tied back with a small tie. Evidence of the five o' clock was starting on his features.

He made his way to the front entrance and entered. Upon doing so he made an effort to search for Felicity at the register. No one was there currently. Sunstreaker raised an eyebrow and made his way down one of the aisles. Maybe he would find her stocking. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and kept his expression firm looking this way and that for her.

Sunstreaker went by another aisle and this time found her, as guessed, stocking a shelf of rubber stamps. She was on her knees leaning over. She sat up and placed her hands on her back and bent forward with a moan. Felicity looked up and saw him.

Her smile lit up her tired expression. "Sunny! Hey! I've been wondering where you went all day. Was the drive good?" She got onto her feet allowing Sunstreaker to close the distance between them. She saw her arm raise into what would have been a hug but she refrained. Secretly he was disappointing but further down he was glad. He couldn't get close despite what his spark told him. Last night was a mistake. The point of no return, he reminded himself.

"I was feeling claustrophobic. It did." He said picking up one of the rubber stamps and looking at it.

"I'm sorry." She flicked her eyes down to the stamp in his hand. "The garage does get small huh?"

"Yes."

The conversation seemed to have died off there but Felicity started it back up. "I get off at five just to let you know."

He placed the stamp back with a firm nod. "I will be back by then. I wanted to stop by and see how you were doing." His sentence came off more concerned than nonchalantly.

Thankfully she didn't make much of this and smiled again ruffling her hair a bit as she placed a hand on her hip. "Good. Good. A lot better than my old job." She said with a humorless laugh.

"I'm glad. No femme should have such a dangerous job." He said with a grumble. "Especially humans, sometimes you are animals."  
" _Lets_ not get off of the subject, Sunshine."

"Don't call me that."

She rolled her eyes. "Anyway, five, alright?" She reconfirmed. "You stay out and drive. I can always catch the bus."

"Felicity..."

"You yourself are not a bus either, Sunstreaker. Take some time to breathe, find a spot to stretch out too. You deserve it." Her voice was concerned. Admittedly, it felt good having someone worry for _his_ well being _._

He gave in. It was true. She could handle herself. She had been before he had met her anyhow. Something was causing him to worry so much for her. The Decepticons weren't after her. She was a no name insect on this planet to them. So why did he feel the need to be by her side constantly? He was too lost in his thoughts to realize she was rocking on her heels.

She stood there biting her lip and leaning forward trying to drop some sort of hint. "I have to, you know, get back to this before the old man comes by." She finished with a breath of laughter. "You can still talk just I need to work as I talk." A smile.

"No, no. I'll leave you be." Sunstreaker was glad she didn't see his internal musings. She had a knack for noticing them right away. It was unnerving at times and yet it assured him that those thoughts didn't always have to be held within.

"He is here today?" That meant he could pick up the sketch book.

"Yes. Why? Need something?"

"No, just making sure you're not alone." A half lie.

"Sunny..." She never finished her sentence. He was already backpedaling away.

"I will see you later then." He spun around and waved over his shoulder.

"Hey."

He paused and looked over his shoulder. "Yes?"

"Last night was nice, Sunstreaker. Thank you." Her voice was low and sincere. It made his spark do funny things.

Sunstreaker remained where he was. His eyes fell onto the floor before he half turned to her. Words fell dead on his lips.

He didn't think much of him laying with her. Until now. He had only touched upon the surface of their night but nothing more. Now he realized just how significant the gesture was to her. And to himself. It felt very good to not be alone.

It felt good to watch her breathe, move, and remain silent. It felt good to be there by her side while she was so vulnerable. It felt right. To protect her when she was so vulnerable. Humans were so delicate. Humans were...she was…

He set his jaw. Primus on high. He did nothing but damned them both.

He nodded. "You're welcome." Were the stupid words that slipped from his mouth. He didn't regret them per say but he felt as if more was needed to be said. Somehow he managed to turn away from her and never look back.

And that in itself felt cruel. His spark wished for something he couldn't quite grasp. Something was telling him to say more but he couldn't. To apologize? To confess that in the end this would come to a close no matter what?

He looked back to her again and found she was smiling to herself as she stocked those rubber stamps. She was sad. He knew it. That smile hid her pain. He knew it all too well.

_She_ knew him too well, already.

The point of no return she had said.

* * *

Heavy steps had him over to the framing desk where the old man had his back to him. In his old age he had not heard him approach. Within his frail hands he was measuring a work of art to be framed.

"Excuse me?" Sunstreaker asked politely. He had respect for the retired wise artists. No matter what species.

He looked up pausing to recognize his face. "Oh, it's you. The one with the troubling sketch book."

Sunstreaker gave the benefit of the doubt. "Yes." He nodded.

The old man made his way to a drawer where completed works were held. He placed a key into the lock and opened it revealing a newly bound sketchbook.

"Some of the edges were water logged. I did my best to press and straighten it out, sonny."

Sunstreaker felt that same pang of panic upon the name, but relaxed. He took the book gingerly from the old human's shaky hands, eyes never leaving it.

It looked wonderful. The blue card stock cover was sturdy and the pages in between were thick. He was almost afraid to open it. It seemed so immaculate. Finally drawing some sort of courage, he carefully opened the front cover.

A relieving warmth filled his spark. With each page flipped held new pages of sketches they had both done. Some of it were works he had never seen, hidden within the pages were her own works of past. "It's beautiful." He said closing it and brushing his fingers across the cover lovingly. "How much do I owe you?"

The old man leaned forward placing his hands on the counter. "It would cost about three hundred-"

"That's fine." Sunstreaker said firmly.

"-but I'll offer you only fifty."

"What? No." His tone never changed. "Sir, I know the situation in this store. You are not in the position to afford discounts. I will gladly pay the price."

The old man looked him straight in the eye. Humans were a young species. They had such short lifespans. But this human held something wise within those eyes. They sparkled. His smile was creaky and unpracticed. "You are quite different, sonny. Kind, genuine, true. Something you don't see nowadays. Three hundred it is."

* * *

The new restored sketchbook rested safely in his glove compartment. More of his time was spent driving. It was nearing dusk and exhaustion was setting into his struts. The worry that he perhaps did too much seeped into his mind. It was time to go home.

...Home.

Sunstreaker let his mind mull over that word. It was foreign and a word he rarely ever said. Most of his life he had no home. The realization came before he knew it. Home was with her.

The warmth in his spark bloomed. The same need to be close to her arose. Being too far away from her felt unnatural. He wondered if she felt the same.

And too engrossed with that need and those drifting thoughts he left his guard down. He failed to notice a black vehicle coming up from behind. Slowly he crawled in and out of traffic going with the flow, completely hidden from Sunstreaker's optics. Dangerous and predatory.

Headlights turned from a regular white bled into red. He noticed the vehicle trail too close behind. Sunstreaker cursed startled from his thoughts. He shifted gears and gunned it roaring by a sensor that was hidden on a corner walk light. A red light flashed upon the detection. They continued the chase that was about to begin. To anyone it went unnoticed. For now.

* * *

"Two energon readings nearby, Prime!"

The leader of the Autobots walked into the hanger just in time for Lennox to announce his finding.

"What sensor outpost was it detected from?"

"It's pretty close. Five miles out.." Lennox said transferring the map on his tablet to the big screen to the side of the hanger. Both humans and Cybertronians looked up at the map. A square closed in on one location, only for another to light up a moment later. They were both moving in the same direction.

"Two of them."

"They're traveling." Prime added.

Ironhide hummed. "Looks like we have 'cons or Autobots. And if it is Decepticons…"

"Sunstreaker will be there." Lennox finished placing his tablet down on a nearby computer desk. He was already on the move. "Alright! Wheels rolling in five!" He announced. "Get a team ready for collateral I want to keep this tight!"

Ironhide watched as Lennox ran off with his men to prepare. "Bring Ratchet also."

The leader turned to his right hand mech and raised an optic ridge. The black mech shrugged and then smiled. "We might as well bring the old 'bot. Get his creaky gears grinding again. We are talking about Sunstreaker." He pointedly added.

* * *

The chase lasted only moments, moving from the city to the highway back into to the city and now here. They were neck to neck almost crashing into oncoming traffic too many times. Sunstreaker swerved out of the way at the last possible moment. But when he did the black Lamborghini was nowhere in sight.

"Coward." He bit. "All of you-" He couldn't finish his curse.

There was a growled rev of an angry engine and then a force was slammed into his side. He yelled out in surprise and pain. Hurriedly he transformed, the momentum flinging him off the road and down a hill leading into a park. He planted his hands into the soft earth and stopped himself, struggling to all fours. He slammed a ped into the ground and looked up gritting his denta. A handful of humans screamed in fear and ran the opposite direction.

They were ignored as the Decepticon transformed, slamming into Sunstreaker once again.

His claws dug into his plating as they scrambled for some sort of dominating purchase. With a grunt Sunstreaker kicked him in the chest forcing him off of his frame. He growled rolling to a stop as the dark mech easily recovered. His claws and feet dug into the concrete of the path, leaving gouges in their wake.

Everything fell silent aside from the humans fleeing and screaming. Hydraulics hissed as he slowly stood.

He faced Sunstreaker slowly displaying a thick and burly frame. Sunstreaker stood on shaky peds pushing his shoulders and helm back. He gazed darkly at the mech.

His hands were long shaped claws that clenched slowly into calm fists. His chest was proud and strong. Armor decals that looked familiar graced his shoulders.

"You are as skilled as they come, Sunstreaker of Kaon." His voice was deep but fine as he finished each word. A hiss escaped his mouth upon the taste of his name.

"I'm glad. I never like to disappoint." He calmly retorted, out of breath. But his tone was betrayed by his weakness. He felt drained from their high speed chase. He felt his energon pump in his helm and his chest tighten in strain.

The Decepticon growled charging forward. Sunstreaker fell into a defensive stance and took the blow. His neck was gripped by deadly claws and was swung into the ground. Sunstreaker offlined and onlined his optics from the surprisingly strong blow. "Fool! You hide your weakness through arrogance! Stand up!" He released him and backed away.

"Come, fight me gladiator of Kaon! Face me like you faced my brother!" He snarled.

Sunstreaker remained on all fours looking up to the mech.

"I am...sorry I have killed many. Can you be more specific?" It was an honest answer. Might as well know who the mech was avenging.

"My _twin_! He growled in a Cybertronian dialect that was hard to translate at first. "Jours ago you offlined him here!"

His memories from the recent battle with the white Decepticon resurfaced. He creased his optics. A twin. He killed a twin? How rare were they…? And he killed one? He set his jaw. He couldn't feel these emotions. The mech was a Decepticon. No matter if they were a twin or not, they all were to be killed. Eradicated. He stood, emotionless. "Suppose I have to kill you too." He mumbled.

He seethed. "How dare you have no pity for your own kind!?"

Sunstreaker growled. "I am _nothing_ like you!" It was he who charged, blades unsheathing by throwing his hands to his side. He released a cry as he harshly swiped at the Decepticon. As his blades moved they reflected the remaining bloody-orange light of the setting sun

He felt his frame lag during the attack. In return the Decepticon swiped at his chest. He spun easily avoiding it. His spark painfully pulsed. He growled to himself turning to swipe at him again. And again.

Sunstreaker back peddled creating distance. His vents came in unsteady pants from his mouth. The black Decepticon in front of him studied the blades. They were still crusted with dried energon. His twins energon. Anger shook his frame. He charged forward.

"You dare to fight me with my twin's blood crested upon their edges? How dare you mock me!"

As he charged the mech reached to his back pulling forth a long jagged and swirled sword. Sunstreaker took a step forward placing his blades to one side of his body before hefting them forward to meet his long sword with a deafening clang of metal on metal. Sparks flew spraying into their vision as they locked optics. The Decepticon towered over Sunstreaker but that did not stop him from being any less determined. He had fought mechs larger than him many times.

The nameless mech broke away regaining his balance.

Sunstreaker forced his imbalance into a spin facing the black mech again. It was a flawed prediction. He stabbed from the front. Sunstreaker had no time to react. The Decepticon shoved his sword into his shoulder with a dull squelch and then punched him aside, pulling the blade back.

He ignored the fire in his neural net and sliced at the Decepticon's legs blindly. Despite it being a messy attack it worked, causing him to tumble. Energon began to dribble down his shoulder and side.

The golden twin didn't give the Decepticon time to recover from the ground. He slammed down one of his blades. Instead of the Decepticon's head he dug the blade deep into the concrete. Sunstreaker snarled. "Bastard." He spat.

"You are the bastard, he who holds no shame." Again the mech rose on his clawed feet and swung the jagged sword at Sunstreaker's back.

This time the twin was able to deflect the blade, reaching to his back to defend the blow. The other blade was tossed to the side for balance.

"Shame is a weakness. A waste of time." He grounded out, the blade swung to his side coming down on the Deception. It dug true, easily cutting into metal and hard protoform. The black mech didn't say a word. No emotion flicked across his features. Anger was but his only fuel.

With each step Sunstreaker rose and dug each blade into the Decepticon's side. Again and again.. He backed away trying to block a desperate assault from the crumbling Autobot.

Sunstreaker snarled face twisting into anger and something desperate. "If I had known it was your twin maybe I would have offered a more painful death."

Right now this twin had his emotions in the balance tipping ever so more and more. This wasn't about Decepticon or Autobot. This was about revenge. A hatred so vile and thick that he too felt so long ago. And if he could use it to his advantage. To survive when he had so little strength left then so be it. Primus forgive him for his sins if need be. For the so many sins he had committed and bathed in.

The taunt worked. The Decepticon widened his optics in shock flaring a brighter crimson. A sound started within the mech's throat before it was released into a pained, anger filled sound. A sound that struck too close to sounding as if it were his own memory.

Sunstreaker backed away as the mech swung down. If he had not moved his body would have been split into two. The heavy sword slammed into the concrete sending the pieces to crack and bounce.

"Curse you to the pit, Autobot scum! Curse you! Damn you! _Damn you_!" He roared. It was a moment of hesitance from the black Decepticon. Sunstreaker took the chance and then ran forward blades at the ready. He was ready to finish this only blow to the spark. Just one blow and it would be over.

He had someone to live for. He needed to survive. Primus forgive me. _Primus forgive me._

His feet pounded into the ground, a cry coming from his throat. The Decepticon turned, desperation welling in his expression. To see something so humane within a _Decepticons_ optics, something so spark broken and agonizing.

All his life Deceptions were nothing but murderers. Just things that needed to be killed for a cause of his own justifications. But this?

This was too much. He saw himself in those optics. Something so young and angry and scared. Something that made his plating crawl. Why would he himself compare himself to…

Sunstreaker faltered just so. It was enough.

His blades met their mark. He continued to look into those optics, so young and terrified and desperate. He smiled. It was barely there. Small and half hearted. Why? He was the one that had the blade in his spark chamber.

Sunstreaker then felt it. There was a very familiar fire that rose in his chest along with the pain he already felt. He let out a low growl. Energon welled up in his mouth. He coughed, the blood splattering onto his chest.

His spark pounded against it's casing. He panted as they both stood connected by one anothers weapons.

A strangled gasp escaped from his mouth as the Decepticon twisted the blade. Sunstreaker's mouth remained open shaking as he felt his legs give way. They shook and quivered, the strength leaving him so quickly. The only support he held came from the blade welled deep into his chest.

Sunstreaker laughed bitterly energon stringing from his mouth.

"It is pitiful to use banter to break me." He leaned in close gripping Sunstreaker's chin in his hand. His voice was cracked and strained as his but determined to hold on for as long as he could. It wouldn't be long. Sunstreaker looked at his blade. It was directly on center. He was too skilled. He knew how to kill too damn well.

"I...I will break you so slowly, just so you, so you feel _every small sensation_ like I did, like-" His voice turned from determined to something shaky. It was garbled and wet. "When my twin was _ripped_ away from me." He clenched his jaw twisting the blade further.

Sunstreaker yelled out, feeling the fire spread to his spark. This was too close for comfort. Too close...he could feel it. His arms were falling limp, blade still within the Decepticon. He was letting go. No. Not now.

Sunstreaker had a second chance. He wanted it. He could live without Sideswipe. He would live on. He couldn't be ended like this.

What about Felicity? Upon the thought of her, his spark leapt as if a jolt of electricity went through it. Her smile, her laugh, her very being.

Her.

"S-Sorry, 'con..." He gripped his hands into tight fist gaining control of his blades again. "I-" He was cut off as the blade was jolted further within him.

The dark mech growled. "S-silence!"

Another twist and Sunstreaker offlined his optics. His mouth was shaped in a painful permanent gasp. Pain was something familiar to the golden twin but this? Something about this moment was something new. Raw.

He reminded himself again. Felicity. He had someone to go home to. _Home._ _Felicity._

He wasn't alone.

Sunstreaker onlined his optics and smirked. The Decpetion gritted his denta. Was he taking too long to die? Tough luck.

Sunstreaker bypassed the pain in his neural net and allowed the last of his energy and will into his arm, his blade.

"I just can't die but-"

He pushed the blade further and twisted it ripping main energon lines and spark casing. Ripping away the protection and the life force that was so delicate.

Sunstreaker laughed bitterly. "But-but If I do. I'm taking you with me. Straight to the pit." Sunstreaker spat the word energon sputtering onto his face.

They were both connected by weapon, by a deadly goal to kill one another.

"Damn you...damn you..." Words that were once clear became guttural and sloppy as each dying moment passed. As he yielded to death so much easier than the golden twin.

The grip on his blade was loosened and Sunstreaker dislodged both his weapons from his wrists. Sloppily he pushed the mech away. He stumbled backwards gripping the long sword within his chest.

He didn't watch as the black mech fell in a heap and offlined permanently. A peaceful expression was written on his face plates. Sunstreaker didn't have to guess why later on. Just like that he was gone.

Sunstreaker swayed on his peds before he fell to his knees. He fell forward catching himself with a shaky hand. Energon spattered upon the ground as a grunt left him from the impact. Slowly he collapsed to his side still gripping the sword that remained in his chest. He vented deeply gaining as much air into his frame as he could to build up for what he was about to do.

He panted through his mouth and gripped the hilt of the sword He held his vent and gritted his denta. He offlined his optics. With one swift motion he pulled the sword from his frame.

Sunstreaker yelled out sucking in hissed sounds. He tossed the heavy sword away without a second thought. The lingering pain became dull, the fire gone from his chest.

He choked once and then twice, coughing up the now freely flowing energon. He looked up to the Deception, frame grayed and long dead. The mech gave up so easily. The will to live. Even if he was a Decepticon deep down it was a shame. Perhaps carrying on without the other half was a burden not many could live through. A damnation that some would rather not live in.

He looked away and down to his chest where he held both his hands pressed into the wound.

Something started to lick at his conscientiousness. Hazy and demanding to give in. He shook his helm attempting to get up. He had to repair himself somehow. He had to get back to Felicity. No doubt she would be worried. No doubt she would be mad he stayed out longer that he originally said he would.

He smiled a breathy laugh. It was gone as he shifted wrong and collapsed onto his back. The mech looked up to the purple sky and treeline.

He laughed.

Sunstreaker didn't exactly know why …but he did. It was hysterical and...and...he wasn't scared. This is what it must have felt like when his twin was dying. It was…peaceful, calm. Assuring.

His spark felt numb. He felt as if he were just falling into recharge but something more was giving way. His hand slid off his chest.

Oh. _Oh_ , Felicity. Her damned smile suddenly came to mind. The way it curved her lips and created folds in her cheeks and creased her eyes just so. The way she tilted her head back when she laughed. In turn he laughed again.

" _Death isn't so bad bro..."_ Her smile turned into his twin's. Ah...that's why it annoyed him so much. His twins smiling and battered face replaced Felicity's smile.

"Guess it wasn't..." He breathed.

He wouldn't see Felicity again. He wouldn't see her smile that reminded him so much of Sideswipe's last. He wouldn't see her again. And for that he was sorry. He offlined his optics and felt a cool breeze come over him. His last vent came from his mouth. In. Out.

But maybe he would see Sideswipe again.

" _I'm sorry."_


	13. Water

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So with this chapter...oh boy. When I wrote it way back when I thought it was perfect perfection, what I failed to do back then was really dig into the emotions that should have been there. Maybe it’s overkill maybe it isn’t but you know what? A human never seeing Cybertronian gore and being thrust into another environment? I don’t think there is such a thing as overkill. So I changed a few things here and there and it seems to flow a bit better. As always enjoy!

 

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen Water**

* * *

It was over an hour and Felicity was becoming worried. She knew that Sunstreaker kept true to the time even when his chronometer wasn't functioning. When he said he would be home, he would be. When he would be there, he would show up. Sunstreaker was rigid and always kept true to his word.

But Felicity had gotten home a few hours ago and Sunstreaker said he would be home by then. She was worried. Maybe traffic jammed him up? Maybe he had to take a detour. Maybe he was just exploring a bit. But he would have sent her a message by now if any of those things had happened or popped up.

Felicity sighed and blew up the bangs that were in her face. She was beginning to paint another section of her canvas but that was proving difficult right now. Her thoughts were everywhere but her canvas.

To try and ease her wondering thoughts she began listening to the radio. It distracted her only a little, but when time continued on, the sun started to set and become dark that is when she was officially worried.

_He's a giant thousands of years old soldier robot._ She thought to herself. He could handle himself. He did without her before they met. He was...more than capable. She forced a shaky smile and continued on. When the song ended, the station's 'traffic scoop' came on. "Be aware of the highways folks, rush hour is slowing down the ride home. Another car accident is reported in Merriweather Park. Detours are posted. Expect some delays."

Felicity lowered her paintbrush and turned the dial. She didn't want to hear people talk or the news. She needed music. She creased her eyebrows in concern. Curiously enough, the same report was on a different news station. "-sightings include a yellow Lamborghini driving in the opposite lane before crashing in Merriweather Park. It is now closed off to public. Expect traffic buildup on the way home…"

It couldn't be. She placed her pallet and brush down.

She changed to another station more hurriedly. "Local authorities tried chasing down the black and yellow Lamborghini but both police cruisers were destroyed in the chase. Three are left dead, and two officers are now in critical condition and were transported to the nearest hospital by helicopter. The chase ended when both vehicles were run off the road into a nearby park…it is now..."

The news was left to play to an empty audience. Felicity was already gone.

* * *

Felicity prayed to God that the sightings were just another hot headed rich guy thinking he could own the road. Just another person doped up on drugs and as cruel as it sounded, just another human.

Just anything else but him, but deep down in her heart she knew. Felicity practically jumped off of the public transport and ran in the park's direction. The news station was right.

_She_ was right.

As before, when Sunstreaker collided with the other Decepticon, everywhere were people in black uniforms. Only this time, the local authorities were nowhere to be found. She was surprised she was able to get this close. The park was closed to its edges. She stopped dead in her tracks, her eyes shifted this way and that searching for what she dreaded the most. She frantically ran down the hill into the park managing to slide by a few guards. Felicity shuffled close to a bush and crept low past another guard. He looked over to her direction just as she hid.

Her heart pounded and her mind raced as she continued to look around. Sweat beaded on her skin even as the cool air of the night prickled at her body.

Finally, just as she dreaded, her eyes met yellow. There, across the bike path, was her Sunstreaker. He was in his bipedal mode and unmoving. What she could only guess was energon ran a thick river across the ground.

She was moving before she could stop herself. Her heart was in her throat and her blood pounded in her ears. She was scared.

"No, no, _no_..." She chanted with hot breaths. She didn't notice that her voice was getting louder as she ran faster. Of course her mind was only set on her Sunstreaker. Not the guards that noticed her immediately. Not the arms and hands that grabbed for her.

She was quick. She was desperate. She was a heavy girl and she could pull her weight when she wanted to. The woman was caught but she struggled free.

The closer she went the dread and desperation only grew as she saw what laid before her. Energon stung the air. Plating was ripped apart. Sunstreaker wasn't responsive to his name being yelled out.

Another guard was messily punched aside. No one would get between her and him. When she was oh so close, strong arms wrapped around her, spinning her in the opposite direction. She was almost thrown to the ground. She lost balance but remained strong. She gritted her teeth.

The man struggled and grunted against her as she reached for the still mech on the ground. He was putting up a damn good fight. " _Damn it_ , someone get the handcuffs!" He yelled.

"Sun- _ahg_ -streaker! No! Let _go_ of me! He _needs me_! I need to get _to him_!" Her voice cracked as she screamed. She attempted to headbutt him but he dodged. She yelled up to the darkening sky in frustration and despair. No one would get in her way. No one. Her heart ached and her panic was pushing her past her limits. She was growing tired fast.

Among her struggles, she heard the all too familiar sounds of transformation. It made whoever was holding her pause. "Major Lennox, release her." The masculine voice said above them.

And that was enough of a distraction. She didn't even pay attention to him as she struggled against the man loosening his grip on her. She threw her head back and was satisfied with the dull thud her head made when impacting his forehead. Her head swam for a moment but she pushed through. For good measure she elbowed him earning a grunt and freedom from her captor.

She turned to run that small distance toward Sunstreaker and stopped dead in her tracks just in front of his face. "Sunny!" His expression was that of calm. Too calm.

Did he welcome his death so easily?

The thought made her heart jump again. Her world was spinning too fast. She went to move again but realized something in the corner of her eye. There, a black colored Cybertronian lain. She placed her hands over her mouth stifling the shrill gasp that wanted to escape. Protruding from his chest were Sunny's twin Cybertonian blades.

The smell of energon permeated the air and hung heavy. Endlessly, it stung her nose. She felt sick. He stomach rolled.

She took another hesitant step forward and another. Her stomach lurched when her eyes caught a large crooked blade resting in a puddle of energon and Sunstreaker's hand. And then from hand, to arm, to shoulder, and then chest...or where a large part of it should have been.

Her hand fell away beginning to shake. Whatever she muttered from her mouth wasn't words nor coherent when she staggered closer to Sunstreaker. She was reaching her limit. Her knees stung as she slid to them heavily.

"Sunny?" Her voice was broken and choked, strained from before.

"Sunny, wake up. Wake up!" She reached forward placing her hands on his cheek shaking his helm ever so slightly. No. He can't be dead. He couldn't be. No. No.

Felicity felt eyes on her. Many of them and she looked up with panicked motions. Through the growing tears she saw other humans were watching her cower over the Cybertronian, no, her friend. She turned back. They meant nothing. Nothing. Nothing mattered if...he wasn't...

"Wake up..." She whimpered one last time. They, they were going to watch the sun set they were going to watch her favorite soap opera. They were going to go to bed and she would say goodnight. And the next morning they would wake up…

She never moved when yet another shuffling of transformation sounds reached her ears and as heavy steps made it's way towards her. They but stopped in his tracks when they noticed her. "Sir?" He asked.

The one that had been watching her along with the others nodded his helm in assurance. The mech moved forward.

And that is when she moved. Too close. Too close! Felicity narrowed her eyes and shrunk closer to him. Her voice was hysterical. "Don't you dare touch him! Don't you dare!" She didn't know where this anger came from. The need to protect him even though she damn well knew she couldn't. Not against giant robots.

Startled, the mech paused his approach. "Easy, I am an Autobot just like Sunstreaker here. I am here to help him."

Felicity wasn't convinced, not until her eyes fell on the Autobot insignia on his shoulder. Next to it was the universal medical cross. Medic. He was a medic. He could help him. He..

She looked up to the taller one. He too wore an Autobot insignia. Her body began to relax. She started to slowly uncurl herself from Sunstreaker. She soon realized that they were all Autobots. The black uniforms that the humans wore held small Autobot insignia on their shoulders.

She backed down, exhaustion taking over her. The adrenaline high was gone. She brushed her hands through her hair weakly. "Oh God…" Tears finally spilled from her eyes. "Oh God...please...please..."

And with that he moved quickly falling to his knees. She looked away before he could do whatever it was with the blow torch like tool that replaced his hand. She jumped upon the sound of the flame hissing against metal.

The same man that held her back, moved closer with caution. "Who are you!?" He demanded, holding his forehead.

Through the tears she willed her expression to become stone. She set her jaw. "Who are _you_?" Her voice tried to sound rough but she was weak.

The taller one decided it was best to intervene at the moment. "Major, may I?" He rumbled.

The man looked up to the large blue and red Autobot before he nodded and gave her a look she couldn't quite read. Not that she cared. She turned to the booming Cybertronian.

"We are Autobots. We are sided with Sunstreaker."

"I...I know that you guys are. I trust you. But, but the humans." She pointed to the agents and the one before her.

"They are our allies." It was a vague answer but it was enough to settle they were of no harm as well. She roughly pushed the heal of her hand into her eyes to rid of the tears. She was so weak.

"Okay. Okay But. Is he going to be alright?" Felicity hissed through her teeth from the frustration towards herself. Her body wouldn't stop shaking. Her heart pumped within her throat. Her head continued to swim. The sting of energon made her stomach queasy.

The green one spoke. "He has extensive damage but stasis lock was caused by the lack of nannites and energon in his systems. The blade missed his spark just so, although some major lines were severed. He will be stable for now."

It was enough to calm her nerves ever so slightly. He would live. He wasn't dead...he would live... She turned back to Sunstreaker. They would help him. "Oh thank god. Thank god..." She placed a hand on his forehead.

It was the proper moment to speak again. "My name is Optimus Prime and this is-."  
Felicity widened her eyes removing her hand from her mech. "You're the leader." She said in realization, looking up to him. "Optimus..." This time in awe.

"Yes." He said with a nod. He continued patiently. "This here is Ratchet, my medical officer."

A rumbled hiss of a diesel engine caused her to jump. Optimus nor the others seemed too concerned by it. She then looked over at a black pick up truck with a squad of soldiers climbing out of the truck bed. "This is my weapons specialist, Ironhide."

She nodded her head watching as the men hopped out of the truck. "I'm...I'm Felicity. I'm Sunstreaker's friend. He's been hiding here trying to find you guys because his instruments became all screwy when he crash landed. He's been stuck with me for a while." Hesitantly she glanced back to her friend. Her voice softened. "He had a clash with another Decepticon but this...this is the worse than before."

She was staying nearby Sunstreaker, placing a steadying hand on his forehelm always making sure she was within arms reach. Everything was happening too fast and even now he remained a set point for her.

"We are aware of his situation." Again the mech nodded once.

Ironhide didn't transform until the last of the humans had climbed from his truck bed. When he did, he barked an order to them and watched as they secured an area far to the left of the offlined Decepticon nearby. Felicity didn't even pay any mind to Optimus, the black one walking towards her made her feel the same fear she felt just moments ago. The so called, Ironhide spoke.

"What's yours?" He asked placing his hands on his hips. He had a deep, demanding, rumbling voice that made her heart skip a beat in fear.

Ratchet moved closer to where she sat and she hesitated to move. There was another smell in the air that made her stomach flip. Against the dark she could see sparks flying from the wound in his chest as he wielded it closed. She stood and moved away from the twin reluctantly but never out of her sight. She carefully kept watch as she did so.

It was cooler now but it felt thick with energon and other smells worse than oil and burning plastic. "Me?" She finally echoed. Her voice was strained, attempting to have control of her stomach. The man who had caught her, and named Lennox had stuck by her even as she moved away. She eyed him caustically. A sort of warning to not come any closer. "Sunstreaker found me. We met," she attempted to find her voice again. "met at an art gallery."

She watched as Ratchet looked up to the Prime. In return his demeanor was less enthusiastic. It was unreadable but she would get used to reading these bots too. If she even had that time. The others…She could have sworn her heart stopped altogether.

Now that there were other Autobots would they take him away and leave her behind? She gripped her hands into fists.

"Art gallery?" It was the medics voice that brought her out of her frantic thoughts. Though she still felt the panic, she answered. After all, it only made sense to explain what a human was doing with an off world killer robot.

"Yes, he was an artist before the war." She gave Ratchet a careful glance. "He told me everything."

"He told you...everything?" Ironhide echoed in doubt, raising an optic ridge.

Felicity didn't like their odd behavior. It reminded her of high school all over again. They weren't telling her something and she didn't appreciate this much. She creased her eyebrows and set her jaw in frustration."Yes, why?" She said turning to him.

"...No reason." Ironhide said quietly in thought.

She opened her mouth to question her most inner fear but her voice was lost when Optimus spoke. "How is he Ratchet?"

"I can only repair so much here. Energon lines need to be replaced and whatnot but I stopped the bleeding. He is stable for now but moving him back to base as soon as possible will be for the best." He flicked his optics to their leader. "You know I came here prepared."

"Good." He looked down at her for a moment, not quite able to read his expression "I will assist in transporting Sunstreaker with my trailer. The Decepticon will be transported on one of your vehicles?"

"Yeah," The Major exhaled heavily. "We'll get a flatbed and cover him up. The rest of the guys will clean up their mess. Damage control with the media and witnesses." Lennox said. He turned to Felicity. She narrowed her eyes at him hands balling into determined fists. With a nod he indicated her. "What about the girl?"

"She will come with us."

Felicity widened her eyes. "Wait, what? Really?"

"Thought so." Lennox said in reluctant distaste.

"She knows Sunstreaker and he knows her, if he were to wake up in an environment he does not know without her, chaos would surely follow."

Lennox blinked. "He's that much of a basket case, Optimus?"

Felicity growled at him. "Watch what you say, solider boy!"

The mech above blinked at her outburst. "For many reasons only Felicity knows." Optimus said in a respectful tone.

Panic settled in. She took a step forward but Lennox was there to stop her. She pushed his arm away. "Where exactly are you taking me? I'm not separating from him am I? I need to stay with him. Please." Optimus was quick to sooth her.

"To hide from the public eye we are resting and regrouping at a nearby military base. There, we can roam freely without the stress of revealing ourselves. If you like you can stay with us and not be separated from Sunstreaker."

Felicity released the tension in her body, She looked back over to the twin's frame and studied his handsome peaceful expression again. It was as if he were sleeping. As if this was the only peace he had ever felt in a long while.

She looked back to the leader and nodded her head. "Yes, I would like that very much."

* * *

Felicity had much experience driving in a sentient being from Sunstreaker, however it felt very odd sitting in the cab of Optimus Prime's vehicle form. He was a leader of an army and well she wasn't. Just a mere civilian. But once he spoke to her, that all changed.

She had told most of her life's story to the Prime and answered whatever questions were on her mind. As they arrived back in the base. They both became quiet. She was asked to leave the cab when he stopped. She had to say her gratitude for him listening to her. She watched as he transformed watching in that same awe she had from watching Sunstreaker transform.

Felicity only moved just so aways to allow Prime to unloaded Sunstreaker's delicate frame from the trailer. Ratchet drove into the hanger and transformed, immediately by his side. When Optimus was moving away with Sunstreaker easily being carried in his arms did she begin to follow after them. Her walk was numbed and tired, her eyes never looking away from the energon that split from his wounds and dripped down yellow plating.

She heard footsteps come after her but ignored them, that is until a hand caught her shoulder. She flinched and attempted to harshly shrug the hand off but the grip was firm.

As they continued to walk away energon droplets fell from his frame to the floor. When she spoke her voice was determined, exhausted and unsteady. "Let go of me. I have to follow them..."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." The voice warned. "Ratchet likes to work in solitude."

"Well, he better get used to me." She said creasing her eyebrows in determination, starting the second attempt to get away. She realized it was half-hearted.

"You know what, girl?" Felicity turned to face the one from before. Lennox was it? He was cringing in annoyance. "Let me put it this way. Cybertronian surgery is messier than human surgery. Trust me."

She finally got free from his hold but she didn't move from her place. She kept her gaze on the floor her thoughts racing a mile a minute. It was a warning that hid a deeper meaning. _Would you really want to see what they will do to him to fix him? Do you want to see that?_ She finally held her head and let out a shaky sob.

She saw Lennox take a hesitant step forward. "I don't know how you two are close but he's in good hands now..." His voice was soft and gentler. To this Felicity looked up to him, lowering her hands. It was such a different voice. It was...almost fatherly. Warm.

She swallowed thickly looking back where Sunstreaker was carried off to. She brushed back her hair and held it in her hand for a moment before nodding her head to assure herself of her own feelings.

"Sunstreaker has been good to me. He fixed my life and saved me from a lot of shit. I just…" She looked away overwhelmed. "He's important to me. Really important. We know too much about each other I guess." She said with a sad laugh. "It's just…I never seen him like this, so broken. Before it was just a plasma burn but now…"

Lennox remained quiet watching as she wrapped an arm around herself and held it with her other hand.

"I..." She started unsure of her next choice of words. "Maybe, I know you think it's weird to have having feelings for him but...but..."

The man raised an eyebrow. " _Really_? Try me miss…?"

"Felicity, is fine, Major." She assured. "And you?"

"Major William Lennox. Will is fine." He offered. "Well, here we treat the Autobots like family. We are soldiers before that, but family. I guess we're all weird here." He said with a smile. A smile that offered a truce.

And to this she smiled back. A truce was made. She relaxed her tense posture. Just by his assurances she knew she wasn't all that unwelcome after all.

"I'm sorry for hurting and yelling at you earlier. I was scared and..." She turned to him fully offering her sincerity.

"I understand." He paused. "You said something about an art gallery. Are you a painter?"

"Yeah, that's how me and Sunny really hit it off. We both like to paint." She said wiping her cheeks that were crusted with tears. Her skin was now itchy from them.

It seemed he couldn't close his mouth quick enough. "Who knew a psychopath Decepticon killer could be a painter."

Instead of striking out or an insult back as before she huffed a curt, humorless laugh. "He's something, I know. It took me awhile to wrap my head around it. But he's good, Lennox."

"Hard to believe..."

"Watch it." She flicked fiery eyes to him.

A grumble from Felicity's stomach interrupted the conversation. She groaned. "I didn't have dinner yet, sorry."

A sigh. "How about we get a bite from the cafeteria and get a room set up for you."

It was getting late and yet the cafeteria was bursting with ruckus. There were men and woman lounging around, eating, or in the rare and humorous case, playing with it. It was loud. Very loud. It was rowdy to the point of being chaotic.

"Whats the special occasion?"

"Taco Tuesday."

She scrunched her face in confusion. Well, that might be something to be excited over she supposed. It was when she was spot and center in the room did she notice the weird looks from all the people in the cafeteria from the lack of uniform. Felicity had been used to the glares or stares over time. After all, she always wore the same outfit whenever she went out into public.

It was a seemingly innocent glance from the Major that set them straight and back to what they were doing. If she was in the presence of him then it must have been alright. "Are you the leader here?"

He shrugged. "Both Optimus and I work to keep N.E.S,T. In working order. Our real leaders are the big wigs."

"Oh."

"But yes. If you're with me you're fine. You're no longer just a citizen. You know of the Cybertronians. You know of N.E.S.T. You are part of a witness program now and maybe more if Sunstreaker and you have something else going on."

She couldn't retort with whatever the hell that meant. Instead there was an odd pang in her chest at the mention of him. She stared at the ground focusing on the strange sensation within her lungs and throat.

Sunstreaker. Would he make it? The gap in his abdomen bleeding energon and other fluids was glued into her mind. The bloodied blades. His peaceful expression. She shivered. She hadn't realized she was slowing down and lagging behind.

Lennox turned around upon the absence next to him. "Felicity, you alright? You want to go somewhere else?" He noticed that a lot of his men were staring at her again. This time he sent them a warned look and they all returned to their business.

She jumped upon his voice. "Um, yeah can we just grab and go?" She said swallowing thickly. Despite her growling stomach she didn't feel all that hungry suddenly.

"Sure."

* * *

Lennox led her to the food bar and grabbed what he could pile atop a plastic tray. Behind the bar were a few men in fatigues cleaning up from dinner. Felicity numbly followed as they walked out of the cafeteria. And as they walked away the muffled voices turned into a blur and then disappeared.

She seemed to be a good girl. Quiet and too innocent to see something that was the Cybertronians' civil war. So how could this young woman be so connected to such an infamous psychopathic warrior of the Autobots? The one who killed countless on the front lines? The one who was the exception to their morals and used as their fail safe or golden key when all went to hell.

But no, she said he was good. He was something to her.

How could she see what she saw?

He continued to look at her as they made their way down another hall and into a room that branched off of what seemed to be an interrogation room that the military stationed here used. It was soundproof. It was enough to earn them a moment of much earned quiet time.

Lennox eased into a metal folding chair and set the tray down shoving it in the center for them to eat. Mostly for her though. He watched as she sat numbly in the metal chair. She just...looked at it. Wasn't she just hungry?

Chips, nacho cheese in a cup, unidentified meat crumble, a juice and milk carton, some chips, cookies, a small salad and to top it off a weird crunchy bar of oats or cereal. It wasn't much but it was something.

He broke the silence to attempt to ease her. "Sorry, the menu isn't a five course meal."

Felicity seemed to snap out of whatever troubled her and offered a polite, yet shaky smile. She hesitantly took a chip and tried it. He knew very well what forced her to not eat. But it was overwhelmed by the natural urge to sustain herself. She dug in. She was starving. "Not at all. Food is food right?" She offered.

Lennox sighed in relief as she ate. He was glad that she was. It was the first step towards something coherent. Cybertronians were cruel beings when it came to the art of battling. Most soldiers or friends he had never really were the same afterward. And him?It was even unsettling to him at times but somehow he managed to keep it together.

"So…" She said all of a sudden, playing with a tortilla chip. "Why aren't you asking me to be debriefed, or locked in a cell for questioning, or in handcuffs?"

Well, Lennox didn't know the answer himself. Protocol would have called that action but he didn't. She was too damn innocent for that. She was already scared and she meant no harm. "Optimus assured me, I guess. Besides, I don't think you are the type to steal classified data from giant robots that could squish you in a blink of an eye."

Felicity smiled lightly, looking down at her food. "No, all I steal is your food."

A nod. At least she was positive. Lennox didn't watch her eat bits and pieces of the food. He was lost in his own thoughts studying her features and looks here and there. She was quite pretty. A hefty young woman who could hold her own if forced onto such a situation. But she was delicate and graceful.

And art? He knew that Cybertronians had culture but to be so alike with humans was something he was surprised by. Especially by the likes of this Sunstreaker. Lennox shifted causing Felicity to jump in surprise. He felt bad. He really did. She must've been lost in her musings also. "Can I ask why Sunstreaker decided to stay with you?"

Felicity held the carton of milk in her hand, lips slightly parted to take a sip. They closed gently upon the question. She was thinking about the answer already wording it in a way that would make most sense to him. Wording it carefully. She was a very readable person to the point of it making her so humble.

She made a sound within her throat and brushed fingers through her hair. "He ah..." She started. "Sunstreaker promised his twin…that he wouldn't give up his love for art. Sideswipe then died and he broke that promise. War was cruel to him, Will. I think it is to anyone. But he..." She shook her head. "Anyway, he just thought that day was the day to start keeping his brother's promise." Hazel-blue eyes looked up to the man. They were fiery and bright. It was only a moment later did he realize she was challenging him to judge. If he would say something she didn't like, she was ready.

Sunstreaker was much more than just something to her. They held something dear and for a moment he thought of himself and his daughter, little Annabelle. Her daughter of only five fell in love with their Autobot guardian the moment she met the brutish Ironhide. One of such strength and stature and with a well known career among the ranks itself, melted upon the little innocent child.

No matter the cost, the deed, or labor, the bot would do anything for their child. As guardian he vowed it so.

Was this any different? Was what they held something of the same or…?

"I hear from Optimus that Sunstreaker doesn't like organics though." He decided to distract himself.

Felicity nodded again unaware of his receding thoughts. "Humans? Some of them." She shrugged. "He focuses too much on the bad ones though. Gives him the wrong impression." A fond smile crossed her lips. It was faraway and loving. "Well, I guess he only gets along with me because I forced the pain-in-the-ass to. Since then, he's had nothing better to do but...I think, I think..."

She placed a hand on her chest.

And to this Lennox knew. Just like with little Annabelle and Ironhide.

Annabelle was the saving grace the very old war veteran needed. The retribution and the reward for being an Autobot all those long thousands of years. Protecting the weak and vulnerable.

Felicity lowered her hand and sighed pushing away the tray of food. "And then after that..."

"He left a good trail for us to follow." He answered.

"Oh?" She blinked at him in question.

"The first attack he left the Decepticon body out in the open. It wasn't hard for local authorities to call us. We stuck around here for a while before Sunstreaker decided to pick another fight."

Felicity creased her eyebrows shaking her head, at the ready to defend the Yellow twin. "He didn't pick the fight! They came after us! He-he only did what he had to do...he only does if it's necessary. He protected me and so many others." She tried to convince herself.

Lennox pursed his lips. "Well, we also found out from the nearby apartment complex that a female was missing. Felicity-"

"Don't say it." She warned, that same fire returned to her eyes.

"Okay...just to know where we are and how to take care of you when this blows over, where are you living now?

"Why do you know so much about me? And why do you care? He's not leaving now is he? You guys aren't up and going are you?"

That would depend on the healing time of Sunstreaker. They wouldn't be able to leave until his health was passed by Ratchet.

"Government branch, we have everything. And no, not yet."

Felicity scoffed. "Of course. And where do you guys hide? The basement of the White house?"

Funny. Her quip was clever and it almost made him smile. He crossed his arms eyeing her carefully. It was like a tango with this woman. The emotions were not wasted, expressions were deliberate. She was a curious woman.

"Our main base of operations is Diego Garcia, an uncharted island. There are more Autobots than just here."

"That's great. An island off the coast of India? Deserted I suppose? Clearance needed? No one can get there without a boat or plane..." She spoke aloud and to this Lennox wasn't too sure to reply.

"Yes…" He answered carefully.

Finally, after so long, she sat back in her chair and exhaled. Her voice was quiet and her expression was relieved. But she was sad. "Sunstreaker will be fine there…" Lennox didn't really dwell on it for the fact they both knew what would happen in the end. He could understand. Those goodbyes to his family grew more painful.

* * *

Lennox sat up from his seat after this and told her he would be back. He would find a room for her to rest in for the time being until something was figured out. Right now everything was in the air and since she was now in the picture they couldn't just up and leave. And to this Felicity felt like the greatest burden to Sunstreaker.

After he closed the door immediately her mind was set free. It was as if those thoughts were hiding in fear and now there was no distraction they could flow freely and freely they did. She sat in silence in the interrogation room mind going a mile a minute with the thoughts of Sunstreaker. Was he alright now? Did Ratchet fix him? Would she be alright dealing with such a secret branch of government? Would she make enemies or allies? Was she truly being selfish by holding him back?

Would the Autobots disapprove of whatever….Sunstreaker and her had? And upon this Felicity felt her chest tighten as if a sudden case of acid reflex started. She felt her skin prickle. She closed her eyes tightly and leaned forward on the table.

Her mind flashed to the gap in Sunstreaker's chest. The energon. The smell of the food on the corner of the table was replaced with that hideous smell.

She muttered words but she herself didn't know if it was a beg or a plea. She just wanted the world to stop spinning.

The door opened and in turn she jumped with a gasp. Sweat rolled down her forehead..

"Felicity? I found..." His expression changed to worry. "Are you alright?" He walked into the room more.

She panted for air for a moment before she nodded her head and blinked. "Yeah sorry, I think I was just getting stir crazy."

"Sorry to leave you for so long. But I...hey, are you sure you're alright?"

Wait, how long had it been since he left her? She looked up to the clock. What felt like agonizing moments was almost an hour.

"Felicity? Do you need a doctor? Are you sure you're okay?"

The woman stood up and held onto the table as she did so. A strained smile left her. "Stir crazy." She assured again. Lennox kept the door open and watched after her carefully as she walked out into the hall. She was greeted by the hulking bot from before. "Jesus!"

She placed a hand on her chest to still her ever racing heart. The Autobot lowered himself onto one knee and observed the femme with a closer optic. Only then did she look up and realize one optic was no longer lit by brilliant blue light, but damaged by a mean looking scar that crossed half his face.

"Ironhide." She swallowed.

"Felicity." Ironhide nodded. "Do you require a doctor? My scans indicate heightened levels of adrenaline."

A panic attack. She was having a panic attack. Was she so disconnected with herself that those moments went unnoticed by her very self?

She shook her head. "No, what were you saying before, Lennox?" She turned to the man to purposely advert the attention from her to the Major.

"I found you a room. Right now Ironhide will take you there. I will be gone for a while after this but if you need anything don't be afraid to use the intercom in your room or call for Ironhide."

"Though I warn you, girl, I'm not your servant." He rumbled offering his hand onto the ground and waited.

For a moment she stared at the hand before she realized what she was supposed to do. Felicity gave the Major a ridiculed glare. "What? Can't I just walk? Can't I just…?"

"It will be quicker this way, human. Hurry along."

Felicity looked up to the Autobot and huffed in disbelief and then back to Lennox who said nothing and was expecting the same. This was just cruel. What if he dropped her? Squished her purposely?

"I will not drop you human, if that is what you are afraid of."

Yes, yes it was exactly what she just afraid of. Her worries were slightly pushed aside as she walked forward. She hesitantly sat upon the edge of his hand before pushing herself back and clinging onto his thumb.

"Get some rest alright? ...figure this out tomorrow." The man offered.

Deep down his offer was appreciated but at the same time she wanted to know when he would leave, if Sunstreaker was feeling better. If she would be set back to her old life without her mentor.

When looking over the edge became a little too much for her spinning head, did she look away and exhale to steady herself. Her heart still raced painfully.

He began to walk and with each step she could feel the hydraulics, hear the clicking and grinding of gears. It was a welcoming distraction. By the sound of this Autobot he was creaky, as if older than Sunstreaker. He seemed so young despite being thousands upon thousands of years old.

Sunstreaker. Again her crazed mind drifted to him. Was he alive? Ratchet said he would. So why did she have doubts? He had worse he had said. So why did she worry so much? It would take time to heal...so why?

"Will he be alright?" The medic had plenty of time to repair him. It had been a few hours.

The mech holding her made a sound within his throat. It sounded indifferent. "Sunstreaker is one of the best warriors the Autobots have. He will be fine." He rumbled.

And then the plea left her mouth before she could stop it. "Please, let me see him."

Ironhide continued to walk before blue optics flicked down to her. She didn't dare to look up to him. She opened her mouth to speak but nothing came forth. Not what she wanted to say anyway. "You wouldn't understand." She murmured her body frozen.

Her throat felt tight.

Ironhide remained quiet as he continued to walk. Did he hear her? He had to have. Sunstreaker could hear things she couldn't at times. And because of this Felicity words reverberated in her mind. Did she even speak? Did she even mutter those words? Was she just believing she spoke them when in fact they were just said within her mind? She groaned holding her head.

Her throat felt numb.

"As a matter of fact." He spoke coming to a stop. Her neck snapped because of how fast she looked up to the bot. "I would."

He stepped forward turning around a corner and into a large hangar. She didn't have time to really observe what was in there because before her, Ratchet was hovering over Sunstreaker's prone frame. She gasped moving to the edge of his hand. "Sunny..."

Ratchet kept focused on his work. The wound within his chest was well sealed but still a work in progress it seemed. Energon wasn't cleaned but now dimmed and dried onto once pristine yellow. What was his usually strained and focused face was now relaxed and more beautiful than ever. His face was so young. He seemed so helpless…

"How is he?" She jumped from Ironhide's voice.

He grunted, his finger curled around a tube to which she would realize was an energon line, an artery or vein human equivalent. She covered her mouth trying not to look at the internals. It looked like a mess of wires, flexible mesh that looked as if it could be metal.

She realized Ironhide didn't draw too close giving the medic ample room to move to a desk nearby. He shuffled around for a tool and then back to Sunstreaker. He had to be in a balanced state for him to be so calm.

"The damage was a shock to his spark. The lack of energon and nannites triggered a spark rebound during the battle."

Ironhide's frame groaned as he stiffened.

"Wait, what's that?" She exchanged nervous glances between the medic and Ironhide.

Ratchet lifted his helm to give the girl a glance and it was the last time he would look away. "Of course you would." He muttered.

Ironhide growled.

"Seriously please. Is it like a heart attack in humans? I know he's been having bond withdrawals. I was there when he had a few while he was with me."

The medic sighed, agitated by their presence. She didn't care. She had to know. This was generous of Ironhide to do for her. "No, a spark rebound is nothing like a heart attack. A spark rebound is a sparks energy rebounding off of the _spark's casing_ when it is strained or damaged. The energy creates ripples and disrupts the pattern of the spark's pulsing causing it to become unsteady. During this battle or long time before, an injury was inflicted on his spark. Only the stress of this battle triggered it."

"Perhaps when he crashed landed."

"That or the lack of updated firewalls, proper coolant and Primus proper anything. Fraggin' mech was crossing the stars without a care." He huffed.

"So..so he's not okay?"

Another grunt. "I will do all that I can to stabilize him." The medic assured, his voice distant. Felicity looked at Sunstreaker's face again. She wanted to go over to him, beat his beautiful face in, and demand that he would wake up and come back to her. Her impulse quickly dissipated for panic.

"I need a straight answer. I need to know for sure."

Ratchet narrowed his optics setting his jaw. "I understand you needed to see him Miss Felicity, but as of now I need to be left alone and concentrate. It is up to Sunstreaker if he wishes to recover from stasis. He needs to build his strength." He sounded like he was trying to keep his patience but an agitation Lennox had warned her of was surfacing.

"Felicity, perhaps it is time for you to rest." Ironhide got the hint loud and clear.

She shook her head. "I can't sleep if I'm not with him. He promised he wouldn't die on me. Not now…" She muttered.

"Come, human." He began to turn and Felicity reached around his hand to continue to stare after the twin. "Wait, just wait for a second. Sunstreaker..." She couldn't find the strength to yell for him because they were already out of the room. She closed her eyes and gritted her jaw tightly. "Damn mech. Damn him for being so stupid. God damn it."

She sat on her legs and held her head within her arms. She tried to remain in one piece but she sucked in an unsteady breath as the sobs rolled from he rlips. It was all too much. Everything came crashing down, her upon the palm of the Autobot third in command.

"Do not waste your strength for tears and worry human," he rumbled. "You should rest while you are able. Sunstreaker would want this of you."

The human could bar to look up to him. She sucked into another desperate gulp of air. His words rang true. He would want her to rest. Not to worry and be as focused as ever. Felicity could hear him now.

Breathe. Be calm. Steady.

Upon those familiar words did she unclasp her head from her arms and look ahead to the hall they were traveling down. "Ironhide..." She started. "Thank you for being so kind."

The mech nodded his helm once. "It is only what I would say to my own charge."

She stared. And it all made sense. "You have a human charge too..." She guessed.

He did understand after all.

They stopped reaching to where they were supposed to be. Her room. She thought. Slowly he crouched placing his hand on the ground for her to step off. His other hand assured her shaky steps preventign her from falling over. She was weak and tired and no doubt he knew this. She truned to face him.

Ironhide nodded once again and moved his fingers in discomfort. "Sleep well human." He dismissed himself even if he was hesitant to do so. Felicity watched after him until he turned the corner and was left alone once again.

**S** he spun around and placed her hand on the handle and opened the door and peered inside. A light was already on meaning someone had prepared the room for her.

It was cramped but she wasn't complaining, anything at the point was perfect. A single bed and a small toilet and shower was a bathroom. Felicity didn't mind. She closed the door and locked it just for privacy. There was a phone on the nightstand next to her. The intercom Lennox was talking about.

Felicity didn't have a need for that at the moment or in the future for that matter. Her body felt heavy and sluggish. Her eyes burned and her throat felt tight. Her body ached as she fell forward into the bed and curled into a ball the best she could for her plus sized body.

It felt so odd without Sunstreaker nearby. It felt so odd without the security he offered just being there in her garage. She placed the blankets closer to her face for comfort.

Until Sunstreaker came into her life she wondered how she ever slept at night. How did she ever function without him. Now he was here in her life, without his presence it was numbing. It was painful.

Her thoughts went to the one night he had slept alongside her. It was wonderful. She never knew her heart could sing so much. Her body so secure and safe. His holoform so strong behind her and protecting her from her very self.

And what was something so minuscule to him was everything to the little human, even if what she meant wasn't to actually stay with her. And to this he didn't understand. She knew he didn't or he ignored it. She was pleading for him to stay with her and not leave her altogether.

And that struck _hard_. Hard enough for her to choke on another breath. Hard enough for her chest to close in on itself. The burning was back and it left her pleading for the darkness of sleep to deliver from this never ending hell of thoughts.

Felicity didn't want to be left alone. Not again.


	14. Caffeine

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers**

**Hasbro owns Transformers**

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen Caffeine**

* * *

Felicity woke up. She blinked a few times before she remembered and registered where she was. Yesterday's memories flooded her and she narrowed her eyes before closing them tightly.

Sunstreaker.

She had dreams about him last night. Funny, she could have sworn she had gotten no sleep last night. How in the world she manged to have dreams was mind boggling. No sleep equals no dreams. No sleep, terrible day ahead.

Groggily, Felicity sat up from her bed and wiped her crusted eyes. The only remaining evidence that she cried herself to sleep.

The woman groaned as she stood up and made her way to the bathroom. She did her morning routine and walked her way next to her bed where she placed her pants and shoes back on.

A sudden loud bang made her look up to the door to the hallway. She hurriedly ran over, opened the door, and was greeted with a lift truck carry planks of metal ceiling beams. The woman driving it was currently scolding the solider next to her for not tying them off properly. One of them came loose from the bundle and hit the ground. She placed a hand on her racing heart.

She hopped off and began to fix the bundle with a disgruntled sigh.

Nothing like a good scare to wake up a groggy soul.

"Sorry to wake you up there." The soldier took notice of her. He placed a hand on his hip and looked up at her hair. Felicity became well aware of it and straightened it out hurriedly. She didn't really talk to humans before her morning cup. After the second then she was ready.

"It's fine. I slept in. Hope...hope everything okay." She vaguely waved a hand at their current situation. "Um, um, you wouldn't know where major Lennox is by any chance?" She blinked pushing her hair back again.

The solder blinked before rubbing his neck. "Sure, I guess you can find him in the main hanger. That's usually where Big Buddha and him hang out.

_Big Buddha?_ She shook her head dismissing the question. "Where might that be?"

The man paused for a long moment. "You're that new girl that came along with the new Autobot, huh?" He said that same smile returning.

Felicity's cheeks flushed angrily. She cooled down though. "Yes, Sunstreaker. I'm Felicity."

"Alright 'city, how about take your there?"

She sighed. Sure, she could use some help getting around. The sooner she found Lennox. The sooner she found coffee.

She didn't really like the nickname. Only her friends where allowed to call her that.

The time they spent going where Lennox supposedly was, was filled with small talk. The guy next to her was the same age as she was. She saw him in the corner of her eye opening and closing his mouth. He wanted to say something but wasn't sure of it.

"...Yes?" Felicity sighed, crossing her arms on her chest as she walked. The gesture as meant to show her irritation. She was not a morning person. Dealing with people at the crack of dawn was the next thing she didn't do.

"Were you there when it happened? When they, ya know, duked it out?"

Felicity was bothered by the question. It was rude and ignorant. Their civil war wasn't something to be entertained by. What was he trying to get at? Despite her growing ire she swallowed her emotions. "No…" She had seen Sunstreaker fight once and she hoped it was the last. "You wouldn't want to see it." She mumbled as an after thought.

He smiled. "I have, though! Oh yeah, Shanghai. Big 'con he was. They're scary, huh?"

She turned her nose up in disgust and shook her head. The hell was wrong with this guy? Nothing about this was anything to smile about. Her friend, her mentor...was hurt and in stasis because of the war. Yes, Sunstreaker was harsher than most Autobots but he was because he was a fighter. Forged in the front lines of war. He was weakened and the Decepticon took full advantage of that.

She turned to retort negatively but she stopped herself.

His smiled had faded away for something sad. "But let me tell ya, they put the gladiators of Rome to shame..." His tone was quiet. "It's honestly an art to them by now."

Had they been fighting for so long that it had been created into an art? Something so natural? Felicity closed her mouth. She considered Sunstreaker for a moment. He was deadly and yet gorgeous in battle. No motion was put to waste. No intention was spared. Just like with the brush, he was smooth and deadly with those blades of his. Blades that made the air quiver in fear when it passed through. It was almost as if he were dancing, putting on a sort of morbid show of death.

So...

_Was_ it an art? To Sunstreaker at least?

Finally she spoke. Her anger seeped into her tone a bit more than what she would have liked. "You're new to N.E.S.T, aren't you?" She said raising an eyebrow.

He wasn't bothered by her bluntness. He laughed. "Nah, just never spend much time on the field anymore. Would love to be back out there, that's all." His tone was heavy. She had gotten good at reading underlying emotions. It seemed to have been a talent she grew being with the golden twin.

"Let me guess, demoted?"

He brushed a hand down the back of his head and cringed. "You can say that." He turned into a large hanger. "Anyway here you are."

Felicity didn't push the topic. She looked around for Lennox. Among the hustle and bustle she found him standing in front of a Peterbuilt truck with a familiar red and blue fire paint job.

He had his arms crossed, casually talking away. A hand was placed out gesturing to something he was talking about. It was funny, to an outside human he would have been crazy, but here it was more than normal.

Lennox heard their approaching steps and faced them just as he needed their conversation. "Hey, Felicity. How'd you sleep? Alright?"

She wanted to give him an honest answer. How she couldn't sleep at all and stop thinking about Sunstreaker? "Fine." She said with a forced smile. Politely she turned to the truck and waved with a tiny bow of her head. "Hello, Optimus."

"Good morning, Felicity." Was the rumbled reply. The smile faded for something tired.

"Need some coffee?" The Major laughed.

The young man that escorted her chuckled. "She was dragging her feet all the way here. Want me to take her to the cafeteria?"

Lennox shook his head. "That's alright, kid. I will, thanks for offering."

He nodded his head. "Well, I'll be off. Gotta get back to my sister before she bites my head off." He performed a lazy salute before jogging his way back.

Felicity watched after him only to break her gaze away when the Major spoke. "He's a nice kid. His sister took him off the field because of that." Lennox said staring after the young man until he turned out of the hanger.

"He wants to go back, he told me." She murmured.

"Yeah well…Lisa doesn't agree." He turned towards Optimus and patted his hood. "I'll talk to you later, alright? Got to give our guest her morning cup before she falls asleep on us." Lennox was already starting to walk away.

Optimus chuckled softly. "Of course, Lennox. I hope to see you too, Felicity."

She paused from following after Lennox and turned to the Peterbuilt. "Sure. Of course, I mean." She said with a nervous smile. How was she to speak to the leader of the Autobots? Wasn't he military too? She might develop a sore neck from nodding her proper respects to everyone.

She caught up with Lennox and was finally able to speak her concerns. "Major Lennox?"

"Please, Will or Lennox is fine." He said with a polite smile. "You're not military. It's alright."

She bit her lip for a second and gave in. "Alright."

The base wasn't that large. From earshot she could hear the mingling murmurings of staff and military. They entered the cafeteria and Felicity immediately pinpointed the smell of coffee. A table off to the side had a small coffee pot and about five thermoses of coffee. How the hell did that little thing make enough coffee for a whole squad of soldiers?

Anyhow, she continued. "I was wondering about something but I wasn't sure if I could. I wanted to make sure with you."

"Alright, shoot." He lifted one thermos after another and frowned. All of them were empty.

The pot was empty as well. No big deal. Felicity opened a can of coffee grounds. "I got it."

"Thanks, as you were saying?'

As she scooped the coffee into a filter, she sighed and then spoke. "I was wondering if I could bring some stuff from my place here." She closed the filter holder and pressed the start button. The machine gurgled and growled. The starting drops of coffee came down into the pot. "I'm not sure how long I'll be here and I have something that's pretty time sensitive I need to complete. If that's alright?" She asked meekly.

Lennox thought about it for a moment before he nodded his head. "Well, the Decepticons aren't targeting you, so you won't cause any trouble. After all, like you said, you might be staying for a while. Who knows?" He shrugged.

She sagged her shoulders in relief. She was in unfamiliar territory and she needed something familiar to keep her company. Sunstreaker was out of the question. That enough made her on edge. He was being flexible and she was grateful.

"Thank you so much, Will. It's only a few things I promise."

"Whatever you need." He nodded.

They both looked back to the coffee maker, the people behind them forgotten and the low murmuring of conversations lulling them into their own musings. Felicity smiled a bit. Ever since she had met him, despite their shaky start, he had been nothing but accommodating and kind. Granted she was younger than him but a fatherly tone was always within him. He was caring and hardworking. True and genuine. His concerns for his men and bots was admirable. He knew everyone by name. The pot continued to gurgle.

"Thank you Lennox…you are very kind." She mumbled another thanks.

Her compliment was unexpected but he remained composed. "I'm just doing the best I can for you guys." Again heavy words.

The light turned off as the last drips ran down the pot. Felicity poured some coffee into a Styrofoam cup and handed it to the Major. "I know. And everyone knows that too. I appreciate it. Really I do." She poured herself a cup. "Sunny will too."

He paused before stirring his coffee. "I have never seen a human so close to an Autobot before. My daughter adores Ironhide, he's her world. It's...different seeing you two though."

"We're close." She reminded him. "Nothing more." They both knew she was lying right through her teeth. Lennox hummed as he took a sip of his coffee.

* * *

After her breakfast and a shared half a pot of coffee. Lennox had guided her to another hanger and to an armored truck. It was brown, big, and completely unnecessary. She smiled and cringed at it and the four soldiers that came along with her.

When asked if it was all necessary the major replied with "Can't take any chances."

It was admirable the gesture and all, but an armored truck and four guys with tiny metal pellets wasn't going to bring down a Decepticon if one turned up. But she kept her comments to herself and genuinely appreciated the safety the Major wanted her to have.

It wasn't too long of a ride. Being in the presence of heavily geared soldiers with large semi automatic rifles was a sort of sight she wouldn't get used to. She felt uncomfortable and a little scared to be honest. They saw this, used to how civilians thought and acted. They shared small talk and delved into a conversation about where they were each from. Their stories were diverse and interesting and she took each of their stories to heart. She started to relax as much as she could. She thanked them for their service with small meek words.

"I lost a good friend to Mission city."

"Just doing what we have to"

Right...right…She could never be as brave as them. Or Sunny or Lennox.

The conversation quieted down before someone suggested going through drive through for a burger.

It was much needed comic relief. Soon they were at her apartment. A few waited in the tank of a car. The other two trailed behind her, their equipment clanking and shuffling as they walked. A woman walking her dog stopped to stare at such a sight before hurriedly making her way down the road.

Such strong men by her side felt overwhelming but yet again it was appreciated. And again she was reminded that these men did care.

She opened the front door and walked in. She assured them they could come in as well and offered a drink awkwardly. They chuckled and declined, studying their surroundings.

Sunstreaker had finished the living room décor not too long ago. It looked brilliant and it painfully reminded her of him. Her heart ached the more she collected her belongings. She knew he was going to be okay. She hoped. His spark would just have to hang on. He did all these years…

She placed all her paints and brushes in a case and carefully placed her canvas in a big plastic folder.

Alongside her supplies she gathered a few clothes, snacks, and toiletries. She walked into the living room where they waited patiently for her. In arms she held two bags. One of them snorted. "Women..."

"Just a few things." She reminded with a pointed fiery glare.

* * *

Felicity made her way across the base with her armfuls of supplies and belongings. She memorized the halls very closely. She knew exactly where she was going.

As the woman walked on, she received many odd looks and glares. Some even asked if she was allowed on base. She told her quick story and they backed away. Some even asked if she need help. At this point the rumor about a girl and a 'bot arriving should have been spread pretty far. "Guess not." She mused quietly to herself.

She finally reached her destination. Felicity slowed down and got a better grip on her belongs before she peered into the closed off hanger. This time the med bay did not smell like energon but some sort of strong cleaning solvent. She crinkled her nose and sniffed before hesitantly going in.

"Ratchet?' She called out timidly to the medic. She knew he had a temper…or so Sunstreaker claimed.

She heard giant footfalls but somehow they sounded lighter and careful. Ratchet appeared from behind a makeshift curtain separating one makeshift berth from another, even though the one next to Sunstreaker was empty.

"Felicity?" He gave her an odd look once he saw all her belongings in her arms. "What are you doing, my dear?"

"I wanted to see Sunstreaker." She said timidly. "Can I see him or…?"

Ratchet raised an optic ridge before he bent down and offered her his hand. When he did Felicity climbed on and kept her balance by leaning against his thumb.

The green medic walked his way over Sunstreaker. She became tense letting her emotions be blocked by a stern wall. Sunstreaker looked better than yesterday. If that excluded the many tubes and lines that went under his chest and arm plating. She could have sworn that his brilliant yellow plating was duller than normal. His face looked as calm as ever. His optic ridges weren't creased so painfully like they always were.

"He is stable for now but he needs to decide when he wants to wake out of stasis."

"He's in a coma?" She asked when she was placed next to his shoulder. Felicity fought the urge to run up to him and hug the side of his helm.

"I suppose, in human terms." He replied quietly with a slight shrug of his shoulder. He was too focused on watching the human behavior she was demonstrating.

Ratchet saw her hands clench and unclench into fists as she stared at him for a long while. Suddenly she ripped her gaze from him. She went to her belongings and started to unpack. Ratchet was still puzzled by the human at how vague she was. Was she trying to hold back her emotions? She didn't when she was at the med bay yesterday.

"What are you doing, Felicity?" That was the second time he asked that question while she was here. This time it was more curiosity than annoyance.

"I'm going to paint." She answered sternly. She didn't care whether the medic liked it or not. She was ready to defend herself. She opened her case of paints and brushes. She was being selfish invading the medic's work area but…

"May I ask why?" Ratchet asked.

Felicity was expecting him to kick her out and be annoyed but he wasn't. She paused and looked up to him. She placed a stray lock of hair behind her ear and looked over to Sunstreaker. She swallowed hard before she spoke. **"** He would want me to continue painting. And I want to be near him." She answered in a whisper.

"Paint…?" He narrowed his optics crossing his arms in front of his chest. He listened as she went on about he gave up painting ever since his twin passed away. How he regretted doing so because Sideswipe made him promise that he wouldn't give it up.

Ratchet knew all of this already. Sunstreaker was his patient may times during the war. Hell, he performed every medical procedure known when it came to him and his twin. Ratchet knew the mech inside and out, whether Sunstreaker liked it or not. He was just wanted to see how much Sunstreaker revealed to her. Apparently it was more than he first thought, no less from a human.

Surprise and pride welled in his spark. Sunstreaker finally was taking the steps to make peace with himself.

"When he found me, he rediscovered his painting and drawing talents." She finally looked up to him and was surprised to see a faint smile on his lips.

Ratchet finally spoke. "You are." his eyes flicked to her with heavy, tired intent, "What he needed most, Felicity."

* * *

Ratchet allowed her to stay in the impromptu medical bay. He even allowed her to make trips for coffee. Even though the medic complained about the substance being harmful and not to healthy for humans, she continued to make the trips and drink the "unhealthy compound". The trips offered her some time to walk, think, and stretch too.

He asked why at one point. She didn't really give him an excuse. She preferred tea over coffee but this was all she had right now. The real reason was that she was exhausted from not getting any sleep last night. Pretty soon she would get a crash.

A tiny pile of Styrofoam cups was stacked near her bags. She looked at the cup of coffee she was recently drinking and sneered at it. She took the last gulp and cringed as the coffee grinds rubbed her throat the wrong way.

She made a sound of disgust before tossing it to her pile. She shook her hand that was growing tired and sighed.

The woman placed her paintbrush down and pursed her lips. "He spoke about you. Once."

"Oh?" He turned his back on her to rub a cloth over a tool of sorts.

"Are you their dad?" She asked.

He stopped his motions. She looked over hair draping over the side of her face. His shoulders sagged.

"Yes and no. When war came they lost everything. Afterward...well." He paused to gather his thoughts. "When they were Autobots yes, In a way I looked out for their well being. But nothing more. A medic can not play favorites, miss Felicity."

It was quiet for a long while. It was long enough for her to begin painting again. She dabbed her paintbrush into some red and then orange paint. She went to the canvas and remembered how she had to show the actual brushstrokes of paint. That's what Sunny taught her and that's what she would do. She made her body relax but most importantly her wrist.

Ratchet turned to her and a vent escapes him, slow and long. "I see Sunstreaker's talent in your work."

"He taught me well." She said with admiration, giving him a short glance and then to Sunstreaker. She smiled sadly. She vowed that she would make the best of the time she had with Sunstreaker before he went off with the Autobots, even if he wasn't awake to experience the time they shared together.

* * *

Nighttime came agonizingly slow. Her exhaustion got the better of her. He eyes drew heavy. The caffeine crash was long gone and she didn't have the need to eat dinner, thought it had been since yesterday she had eaten. As a food lover her heart ached upon this natural state she grew into.

A groan escaped her lips. She had just finished cleaning her brushes and paints when her eyelids started to sag. Maybe she could rest her eyes a bit. It wouldn't do any harm. Felicity sank to the ground in front of her canvas. The clean paint brushes and pallet still in hand as he expression relaxed and her body followed.

Outside Ratchet was returning from a discussion with the Prime flicking through the reports from the Decepticon they found alongside Sunstreaker. When he wasn't greeted by the human he looked up to where Felicity was painting out of habit but was alarmed to find her on the ground.

"Felicity?" Worry laced his voice as he hurriedly came to her side. A quick scan found she was simply exhausted and fell into sleep.

He sighed through his vents heavily, relieved. He just couldn't quite fight his jumpy actions when it came to medical impulses. Seeing still bodies and... He looked around his med bay and grumbled under his breath as he gathered stray clean rags. Those were thoughts to stray away from.

The old medic folded them and piled them neatly on top of each other.

Ratchet gently picked Felicity up with both his hands and placed her on the makeshift bed next to Sunstreaker's side. It would do more better if they were close. Growing suspicions became stronger the more he watched the curious human. And he had no doubt would they produce promising results.

The medic would not admit it was him who put her there the next day


End file.
